Tigers and Sharks

Aqua Games again! Oh well at least there's warm water this time. Abe scores a virgin, then a punch!

Analysis

Before I begin my analysis, I would like to mention something that annoyed the heck out of me during the half hour of this program Monday Night. Now you'd think after years of being force-fed cheesy lame Road Rules advertising gimmicks I would just bite my tongue and swallow. But just look at the sleazy promo there're advertising for the Latin American season for crying out loud--dubble by the cast trailers:

• Josh - "The Nice Guy!"
• Holly - "The Softy!"
• Brian - "The Flirt!"
• Sarah - "The Skeptic!"
• Abe - "The Bad Guy!"
• Gladys - "The Fist!"

Now on with the show!

Wow!

From just watching this episode you can see what really attracts viewers to Real Rules: jealous love triangle, strong character interactions, an exciting mission, one night stands with your usual "tell all!" gossip afterwards, and the "Big Fight!" payoff at the end. "Tigers And Sharks" has all of the above.

I imagine anyone with access to the Internet and two cents will make some sort of pun intended on this episode. On the same level, I think it says something about a society when violence attracts this much attention. As everyone well remembers the week of the infamous RW Seattle "Slap Episode", every Real World message board was flooded with Real Worlders and non-Real Worlders giving their opinion on the matter. But I don't want to get into comparing the two incidents because the events which led up to the "slap" are a complete 180 in contrast to the events which led up to the "blows".

The plot is another reason this episode gets a 5. Up until "Fight the Bull!" we were given shows with a somewhat interesting A story only to be distracted and annoyed by a pointless B story usually involving a mission. This time around, everything stays on track! No derailing into annoying B and C plots that have 0 relevance to the main story.

Here Holly attempts to use some buddy-buddy therapy in hopes that she'll be able to change Abe's attitude towards woman, and look apond them with a new found respect unlike a great explorer looking for a conquest. Ha! Like that's gonna happen! They don't use the phrase, "Can't teach a old dog new tricks!" for nothing! One thing that had me stratching my head was this seemingly out of the blue jealously Holly directed towards Abe and Susie. Where the hell did this come from? Back in "Cobwebs and Margaritas" Holly made it plain that Abe wasn't her type age, and maturity wise. Here she's acting like there're going steady, sprouting a jealous streak that coincides with her removing one article of clothing, then another (Just some food for thought). AS IF! The producers needed to add a bit more drama to the soup, and offered her $50 bucks to stir up some "controversy" to make the meal a delight! But I digress.

Memo to viewers, if a character's attitude or personality change doesn't coincide with previous situations relevant to the current, it usually screams in big bold letters......"SCRIPTED BY BMP!"

It was nice to see the Aussie cast again even though we didn't hear much of anything from them except their mascot, and BMP's golden ticket Susie (Who I'll get to in a moment). And it was also nice to know that they have an abundant amount of spare time in their seemingly busy lives to do "another" guest appearance. Now I have nothing against the Australian Cast, But AS IF! These people sit by the phone waiting for the call from MTV or BMP telling them they've scored them a new gig! This is the forth time either the whole cast, or a cast member has done a guest appearance on another show, in less than a year no less! At least the Islands Cast knew when to stop! I'll swallow their guest appearance here, but they need to give it a rest. Oh, and would some kind person please donate acouple grand to Chadwick for laser surgery to blast that tattoo off his chest?

And like last season which earned the title, "Road Rules: Australia Starring Susie", the little blonde girl remained the center of attention, cooing for the camera while her other cast members just mellowed around to serve as nostalgia, and comic relief (a la, guys doing synchronize swimming). here Susie imploys the "Sweet naive innocent virgin factor" along with sexual innuendoes to hook in yet another unsuspecting guy.

And as expected, Abe rose to the bait imploying some of his own scoring tactics such as using Menudo as a pawn to butter up Susie. Then the lowest came later that night when he ask Susie what's her religion's stand on fornication? A question that obviously translates: "You know what I want!" But why am I allowing myself to get upset over this? After all, this is the Abe we have come to love and hate over the past six weeks. It's not like this is the second episode where we're just tapping into the character's personality. We know what Abe is all about: a manipulative immature attention seeking player. And one of his obvious goals on this trip (To Score) has finally been accomplished!

So what's next on the "Abe Agenda"? Well, there's that little ole hotel skirmish involving Gladys that reread its ugly head in in the last few minutes of the show, thus leaving us hanging till next week to find out Gladys's fate. But suffice to say last week I told ya so! I told ya so! Whether you side with either Gladys or Abe depends on your perception of the characters over the past weeks. Not just the events that transpired here.

The arguments leading up to the fight revolved around Gladys's disapproval of Abe's choice in women, and that it's unbecoming for a virgin to behave in such a manner (Gladys should've seen Susie in action Down Under!) Things begin to escalate when Abe starts digging into the past. Bringing up the taped private conversation incident in "Trust" where Gladys got in the middle of Abe and Brian's feud as a example of Gladys sticking her nose in places it doesn't belong.

Now granted Abe's conclusions were warranted. I've commented in the past about Gladys's gung-ho "Everything is my business!" attitude....."Cobwebs and Margaritas" "Trust". However, there were occasions where she stepped in to comfort rather than confront like in "Cinema Spaghettios" when Abe was worried about his dad. But here it just seemed to be another case of Gladys butting in other folks business.

Throughout the episode Gladys stated that she doesn't like the way Abe is using this girl because she herself has been used in the past. But honestly I think Susie's the kind of girl who wants to be used! That's exactly why I didn't have any real objections to Abe's pursuit of Susie. Here Abe declared himself an honorary player with the line, "I'm determined to really get to know this girl. Whatever it takes!" Translation=Score. And Susie has demonstrated in the past how she likes to be played. So there're in effect made for each other!

So that still begs the question..."Why did Gladys get upset?" Some say Gladys may have had a thing for Abe. Pointing out dreams she had where she and Abe got it on, then along comes this ditzy little blonde to screw everything up! So both could've been contributing factors, but I don't agree with how Gladys handled the situation. Going off on Abe, and giving him the beating of a lifetime instead of doing the lady-like thing, giving a "Talk to the hand" jester and walking away!

On the flip side, I disapprove of Abe's temper testing tactics he performed on Gladys to tick (And I use that word lightly) her off. Abe knows exactly which buttons to push with Gladys, but calling her a "bitch" was out of line! And for those of you who disagree with me, and approve of Abe calling Gladys a "psycho bitch", then you can very well justify Stephen for calling Irene the same thing given the situation. So in a nutshell, what did Abe expect? He punched in his calculations, and got the final result! Kudos to Brian for stepping in and breaking up the fight before it really got out of control because Sarah seemed too concerned that she would break a nail, or mess up her doo if she intervened.

So what's next? Well we have to wait and see if either Abe or Gladys will be hitting the road next week. I can tell you right now that one of three scenarios could happen: 1. Abe leaves 2. Gladys leaves 3. They kiss and make up, or 4. The producers make Gladys sign a partition promising never to go off like that again, or it's home sweet home. As it stands right now, I'm leaning towards option #3. Abe and Gladys remind me of Antione and Belou with this love-hate relationship, and the way they bicker and snap at each other. Never letting each other get away with stuff (See season 3).

Personally I think it would be in the best interest of the show if Gladys stays because she along with Abe are seemingly the most and only interesting people on the trip. Besides I seriously doubt that Gladys's fellow travelmates (Including Abe) feel threaten by her in response to this incident. I'll probably have more to say on this when we come to the conclusion next week. Till then....enjoy!

(This review is dedicated to Susie who is alas, a virgin no mo.)


NEXT WEEK: Is someone leaving the trip?

Jump straight to "Sticks and Stones". Or go back to "Fight the Bull!".

Other Reviewers:

• Billy and Tracy
• Kelley
• Carla

Road Rules Reviews Copyright © 1999