Episode #201
Broadcast date: 11/09/98
Location: San Francisco
Summary
Then we get shots of some security types barring guns. And if you put two and two together, you'd suspect things don't look good for these to-date nameless people.
A white stretch limo is flying down the highway follow by a armored car. Inside the limo, we find a tug-of-war being wedge over a blanket. When the battle is finished, we see another familiar looking face. Hey, it's David from RW LA who is this seasons "Mr. Big"! And no, don't correct your TV color settings. He's decked out in flashy fire red suit that even James Brown would admire!
Mr. Big tells the audience that he's "David from Real World LA". While he's speaking, we get a flashback to the glamorous-hallway-incident that was almost as infamous as the "bitch slap" scene. Then he says that he's here to give 12 young people a run for their money. All the while having the time of their lives.
Roll opening credits
* * *
The two cast are there, and are still clueless as to what's going on. Playing for team Road Rules are Mark season 1, Roni season 5, Noah season 5, Kalle season 4, Kefla season 6, and Anne season 5. Playing for team misfit-I mean Real World, Neil season 4, Janet season 7, Jason (who's gone bleach!) season 6, Beth season 2, Nate season 7, and Montana season 6.
Mr.Big gets a phone call and he tells the person on the other end to put him on the PA system pronto!
The football field fills with the charming slick voice of Big informing the two teams on what's happening, and the importance of getting the golden dollar. Mark's claiming he'll give Michael Johnson a run for his money after seeing the fastest white man alive dart after the golden bill. Nate's taking a more mellow approach saying he's just going to get it first! No hype!
Then out of nowhere in comes a chopper that flood the whole field with greenbacks. The two team scramble for the golden bill. Apparently, all that earlier hype about seeing a particular-fast-white-man-score-a-golden-bill was all a bunch of smoke because when it clears, Nate ends-up finding the bill.
When everything settles, the two teams realize who there're competing with. They do the regular greeting jesters: "hello, how are you, my name's so-in-so." Neil's not too thrilled with his travel mates. He compares them to a freakshow. Well, there's Jason's hair!
Soon the stretch limo-followed by the armored car pulls-up. Beth recognizes the face on the bill and informs us that David is her favorite roommate from LA. Ya, the same "favorite" roommate you screamed rape on, had a mock trial and kicked him out of the house thus trashing his career, now she's slobbering all over him? Get real! Mr. Big hops out and everyone's AHHH-strucked. Big tells the kids that he'll be their travel director the next few weeks. Montana feels that Mr.Big's suit is two sizes too big. And I can think of a lot of things that are too big for her, but I won't go there.
Anyway, where were we? Oh ya, Mr. Big tells everyone that they'll be competing in different events for a grand prize of drumroll $50,000 bucks! The kids eyes go wide and smiles are from ear-to-ear. And to let them know he's not screwing them, Mr. big calls over some stocky security guard carrying a bag full of dough. The two cast lick their lips as they drool of the brand spankin new bundled 50's before them. And it's clear in the nester's eyes that he'll do just about anything to get it even though Mr. Big reminds him that this is a TEAM effort....Ugh, ya!
Big wants to know which team has the golden ticket. Nate whips it out and as first prize, the winning team (Real World) gets to ride in style in the stretch limo. Leaving the losers (Road Rules) a dumpy van. Big tells them where the next event will be held and both teams hightail it for their rides.
Note: Big doesn't give any specific directions on how to get there. No problem says Janson since RW already has a limo driver who knows his way around. On the other hand, team RR doesn't have the luxury to sit back and whine about getting paid, and living rent-free.
In the limo, the Real Worlders make small talk while Nate's on the phone reporting to his parole officer Stephanie while gulping down a bottle of whiskey. Meanwhile, team RR has to nearly run other people off the road just to keep-up. When they catch-up, both teams proceed to doing middle school antics such as Nate spitting on the opposing teams vehicle, Noah mooning the RW misfits, and other immature stuff I unfortunately witness back in the 5 grade. Mark's betting Neil's wondering what the hell is going on here. And I'm guessing Neil's thinking the same thing because he has that what-the-hell-am-I-doing-here look on his face. Nate changes tactics. Deciding that spitting on RR's van is not his style, he rallies the others around the we're smarter than thou mentality. Neil's getting into the mood informs them that he's now Dr. Neil. Everyone is surprised by the news and congratulates him. Note: Why is this presented like it's something new? We've known that Neil was working towards his PHD every since the Real World Reunion.
They arrive and find out that there're going to do some roller derby. Everyone gets excited while Neil is still looking a little uneasy. The two teams meet their captains. RW's Cap is Jan, a redhead middle age women, and for RR Ice-Box. A big man in a BigCrusher/Heavy-D sort of way.
**
After a brief info on the rules of Roller Derby, the teams try some practice rounds. The kids are still working on their balancing skills, taking a few spills along the way. Neil's totally cluesless to the sport, comparing it to Cricket. And from hearing that, I know RW is in trouble. Then he makes a move on Kalle that receives a round of applause, and a lighthearted scolding from a referee who re-informs him that taking out your opponent doesn't require him to be on top.
After another pushing-shoving match, and a few more spill. Both teams compare and contras the opposing team players. And as it stand right now, RR has the upper hand with Kefla, Noah, and Roni. Mark could drag his but in there as well, but he's too preoccupied on giving commentary as team leader. On the other hand team RW seems doomed from the start. We have a failing actress, a would-be poet, a clumsy redhead who doesn't have a chance judging from her performance in the first RW/RR Challenge, and a guy who (going on his earlier comments) doesn't even know what rolloerblading is. And if you put two and two together, RW might as well save themselves the embarrassment and forfeit! That is as it stands right now. Nate seemed to be the only one cut out for task at hand.
Ok, back to the show.
All that rough stuff leaves both teams tuckered out, so they all take five before the main event. And it seems we have a our first couple of the season. Kefla informs us that he and Roni have been hitting it off since they first met during the RR Aussie/All Stars event. The boiling romance is temporally put on the back burner when Roni spots some beefy looking guy wearing a resort club outfit strollin offering free massages. The girls are a drooling (except for Montana, after her last experience with Oscar she knows not to ask a guy for a massage) for the magic touch even though the guy already had his pick, just like a cheetah zeroing out a gazelle. He makes a beeline towards Kalle while the other girls are forced to watch in envy.
After the break, everyone suits-up in their shiny new red & blue T-shirts, and snap on their headgear. It's time to rumble! Even after putting both shoes on the WRONG foot, Beth insist that she and Montana act as jabbers for the RW while Nate's looking rightfully concerned. Not some much for Beth's safety but for his teams overall performance. So after a team high five followed by a pep-rally and some horsing around, everyone gets down to business.
The two teams start out on a even note. A lot of pushing and shoving, and a few spills. Soon RR gets the upper hand when Flying Noah scores a point, then Roni. So Nate gets all pissed off doing a over-the-head motion with his helmet just because his team isn't putting as much effort into the competition. Then he's up in the referee's face barking demands. In return, the ref tells him where to stick it or he's out!.
Nate looks angry enough to chew duranium! RW is ready to kick some serious but! Then they shoot themselves in the foot when Beth takes a nasty spill and ends-up busting her leg. This devastates Nate who believes they've lost the only girl who could stand up! Given Beth's past performances in outdoor events I'm surprised he thinks that highly of her. The RW tries to make a last minute comeback, but no such luck.
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Road Rules ends up winning the event. And as first prize, the gang receives a PHAT bus that would make the winne look like a pinto. Their own personal driver named Wayne, nice carpet, TV/VCR, kitchen area, roomy sleeping quarters, same old laptop thought. But hey! It beats what the Real World got. On flip side, the Real World is thrown in what looks like something from Sam's used car lot. Dirty carpets, numerous duct tape patches, smoggy windows, and on the back wall is a poster that reads...WoodStock or bust. As for the bathroom (if you'd call it that) well, I won't even go there! Let's just say I would stop at a service station to make a nature call! Where's the laptop you ask? What laptop? Screw the laptop, these twerps better be happy there've got something to cruise in!
Beth, not looking forward to her new living quarter puts on her best pout face in a attempt to bribe Mark into letting her ride for free because her poor little leg is broken. But Noah ain't buying it! He tells her to haul her butt up in the hippie mobile or else! Speaking of which, BMP throws in this cheesy horn on the rag in an attempt to improve their moral. Making it as though the Real World has something Road Rules doesn't have. Which they are correct, something crapy. Ice-Box and Jan bid their good-byes to teams and gives them their next clue. So the two groups travel down road, winners in front, and the losers rightfully taking up the rear.
The teams arrive at a trailer park to spend the night, and it's here we get a quick subplot to win money. BMP throws in a stuff bear for the kids to fight over for a chance to an extra $3,000. then we're subjected to some more grade school antics which is just there to annoy the heck out of you!
Later on the two group mingle, and for all of you Jason/Janet fans out there. It turns out that all those rumors were right. If only Janet will give the guy a chance instead of blowing him off because he makes a single mistake. And it appears that some of Lindsay's sexual innuendoes have rubbed off on Janet.
Beth wants to get her leg checked out, and Montana offers to go along with her. [It seems Beth & Montana are pairing off into a buddy team. But unlike Janet & Lindsay, these two seem to act more mellow.] The doc tells her that she'll have to sit back for a few weeks. With 50 grand at stake the rest of the Real World gang isn't taking this news well. And Nate's demanding that they ship her sorry butt back home (although some of the other guys were calling for her dismissal, Nate led the campaign) and suggest MTV yank some poor soul from their "real life" just to take orders from the army brat!
For those of you playing the home game, Mark is apparently the leader for Road Rules. So guess who's calling the shots for Real World?
* * *
As closing credits roll, we get a scene at breakfast where the age-old season premier subject of how old are you comes up. Beth tells everyone that she's 29, then Noah starts mocking her. Suggesting that her presence would be better served on VH1 instead of MTV. Beth wisely avoids the truth of that assertion blows it off promising to get back at (in her view) the little twerp in the next event that will hopefully have hand held metal objects.
Analysis
For a season premier this one was pretty good. Let me start off by saying that I'm glad to see some of my favorite cast members back in front of the camera struggling with the daily pressures of life.
It was also nice to see David again who's this seasons Mr. Big. Yes, Puck has passed down the flashy suits and jewelry to another loud controversial black sheep cast member. And if this any indication of the future, we'll probably see either David or Stephen hosting next season.
With RW/RR Challenge, another spin off to the BMP franchise, you wonder how far they can actually go. First, there was Real World, followed by Road Rules, then Road Rules All Stars. Now we have the RealWorld/RoadRules Challenge. I imagine MTV can only go so far With all these road trip series. And unlike RW, RR's days seem to be numbered because with RW, there's a host of cities here in the US and around the world for the picking. I suspect RW producers have at least another decade (provided no one gets seriously injured or killed) before they run out cities.
As for RR, They've already done at least 6 shows (if you include all stars and this series) where they traveled in the US. And it gets pretty old after revisiting the same places over and over again. I mean how many times have they been to LA, San Francisco, or New York? Hey MTV, there's a whole world out there to explore. Provided MTV's done this with shows in Europe, Caribbean, Australia, and soon to be aired Mexico in January. But there are plenty of other places they can visit such as South America, Africa, or Asia. They could even do another European show because there were a lot of countries the cast didn't get a chance to visit. Or they can even do another Island season in the South Pacific.
MTV must have some serious cash to burn. The last time I saw MTV blow money like this was when they surprised the cast of season 2 with new cars. Apparently buying 5 Hondas blew a whole in their wallets because the following season, the European cast were left with a lame home entertainment system. Provided, HES are not by any means cheap, but they could have done better. I have to admit for what all these kids have to go through, the last few season (Besides Aussie) have had some pretty lame rewards. What kind of compensation did Noah or Roni get for the theft of their guitar and Victoria Secret collection? A crappy TV/VCR, or something like that! This season, they have a luxury bus for the kids that only rock and pop music stars ever get to cruise in. Add that to the 50 grand awaiting one of the teams and you suspect MTV must have some pretty deep pockets!
The RR cast were great! Noah's cool, Kefla and Roni seem to have something going on. They've been hitting it off since the Road Rules Assie/All Stars challenge, and I suspect to see some more chemistry between them. Anne's on my cool list also even though she was kind of annoying during season 5. Kalle's her beautiful self as usual. The only person that was missing was Kit to go along with Mark. I would like to have seen Kit on the show, but one of the other girls would've gotten the boot. Mark and Kit have made several appearances on both shows, plus making a road trip vedio. I enjoyed watching them in RR season 1, mainly because they brought a certain type of chemistry (the whole partners-in-crime/comedy-team) to the show that other couples haven't. If you could name two others that would come in a close second, it would Timmy & Christain.
As for the RW team, well I guess it's no surprise from viewing the breakdown that I'm not that much of a Nate fan. I'm sorry, but Nate's attitude pisses me off most of at times. I must admit, I thought both Anne and Montana were pretty annoying on RR and RW. But here they seem to have changed. Nate on the other hand hasn't changed since RW Seattle. If anything he's gotten worse. I think his attitude during the whole show was immature, and as a result, he makes the rest of the RW cast look bad. I would rather have had Dave take his place anytime. As a matter of fact, I would rather have another guy from RW to take Nate's place. Dave has a great personality, and is a down to earth guy. But if Nate continues to moan and bark orders, team RW isn't going to win crap!
For the rest of the RW cast. Jason's cool. He was one of my favorite cast members from Boston. The only negative comment I have is about his hair. Let's just say going blond isn't for everyone. Neil and Janet are cool. Poor Beth still can't handle the outdoors. Seems like when ever she goes on a road trip she ends up breaking something. If she plans to stay and tough it out (which she should. Hey Oscar did!) She should consider straying away from certain events that require wheels.
As for this whole peachy clean friendship between David and Beth.....I'm sorry, I'm having a hard
time buying it. Beth was considered enemy #1 to David half of the time while he was living in the
house. And now since the RW Reunion, there're the best friends in the whole world. I'm not saying
that people can't change, but it seems odd to me that the same woman who called rape on him, led
the campaign to get him booted from the house, and didn't even offer a stated apologize (at least
that's how I viewed it during the reunion) would suddenly change and act in a let's pretend this never
happened manner is kind of confusing to me.
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