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George.W#2 and Sadam.H. idiots all
G o d b l e s s A m e r i c a
Edgar G. Robinson gangsters
landlord grumbling I took a nap
chinese food last night
early morning walk to computers
sorry................there was NO yesterday
this is only today
....................................................................
there is hay
there were había
there was an old sign for a bar that disappeared long ago
into a dark alley where only smelly piss left behind .
OVER THE HOLIDAYS, when I wasn't looking
the sign also disappeared
las cuatro reinas
t h e f o u r q u e e n s
and I am not
sure whether this means
a d i s t u r b a n c e in t i m e and s p a c e
or merely a
[disconnect]
n e t s p l i t
like chatters used to say in the undernet
seven years ago when I was chatting
after work at work in the palacio municipal
al otro lado en San Diego
before I grew my hair long and
moved to tijuana to write poetry
with my cousin Michael
-- Oh Dani, Danny, Danial, you know perfectly well what happened only
t i m e a n d s p a c e
w a r p
a n d f o l d a r o u n d
the
Aztec calendar between 3rd and 4th and A and B
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there are robots on Mars with less computing power than you, reader,
and I writer
share between us here
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"it's funny how I find myself in love with you
if I could find my...."
there's a new mix on the radio in the morning cafe at six a.m.
ay Tere come home come home come home
I ask myself how much do you
it's my life don't you forget it it never endssssssssssss
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Took a nap yesterday I'm getting like Ronald Reagan vibes losing an
afternoon's sleep over one world crisis or another
except for me they are word crises
"word" not "world"
and for you it could be world "cruises" heh PHIL: link to freighterworld site, please...................
heh
ah yes God bless America (I say from across the line where "America" means
"the Americas", too, and also and ever flash bam stars and streamers the Uniteystates yes too
God bless the union my boys mmm southerners suddenly growl
why they heck you make us scroll all the way out here for what northern propaganda
damn yankee we rebels
will never forget never surrender never bla bla bla
"outlast, outwit, outplay" SURVIVOR the series talking about REAL idiots, heh, even
worse -- much worse -- than the BUSH number two administration
are those socalled reality game shows heh
Jesus Christ have mercy but the world REALLY is a quick ride to hell
well I have plenty of bla bla bla
so you must imagine, whoever you are
that I AM very very grateful to have been born USAmerican
God bless America I feel perfectly free to obsess over wordy crisis
bla bla bla my word crises yes
and self-censorship and silence in the face of oligarchy goes and comes
cheek by jowl with freedom of speech so [deleted] don't you doubt
mmm yes don't you doubt it we all walk around thinking no way I'm gonna yell
FIRE in no damn theater if they aint nothing burnin'no no no no
BUT and something IS burning the United States is destroying itself
s l o w l y s o s o s l o w l y
God bless the U.S.A. where we can obsess over words
and elect idiots for president number TWO squatting superweapons behind the bush
sending our men and women to die for someone else's problems
for his own guilt over his father's failure
QUESTION:
(now that sounds familiar, Danny, no, hmmm?)
mmmm Danny where is your spirit to save the world now?
ANSWER:
down the tubes with car bombs and Leonel's chicano nephew from Tijuana in Irak
who saw his buddies BLOWN TO BITS when the rocket propelled grenade
hit
their HUmveeeeeeeeeeee
at the corner in Bagdad (this was true, he swears, knowing only that he
heard it from the man himself who
cannot believe his nephew is over there almost killed for
an exTexas governor who executed more prisoners than anyone ever before)
and then Danial opens his mouth and says hey
where are the facts where are are the are thehehe truths here in this
mess
all we know is what we read in the newspapers
WILLIAM RANDOLPH HEARTS
has no hearst
has no hearse
has no horse
my kingdom for a horse
and meanwhile
and mean very mean
and smiling about voting against idiots (all of them) who led us to war
against dirty rats hiding in a hole you dirty rat you tried to kill my brother
I mean my father behind the bush yes
so come out of your hole you dirty rat from Irak aw heck what do you mean
you aint got no weapons of mass destruction down in that palace hole with you
oh sucking shiite what the frack we gonna do now
simple: you won the war, just like your father (God bless him, too, yes)
AND you will lose the election, just like your father (God bless America, for this
freedom to hurl the leader OUT of office every four years yes).
AND if he wins
and if bychance he wins
well, I can live with that, too
the price of freedom is tolerating
when people elect idiots to lead us blind
it means four more years of writing for me heh
bla bla bla bla they are all the same anyway tweedledum and tweedledee Gore Vidal yes
*sigh* what -- was life really easier in the golden ages of the great depression
under those shining stars of Jimmy Cagney and Edgar G. Robinson ?
Warner Brothers gangsters shooting tommy guns in their unknown Sadam Husein
fantasy novels that never got written
yes, my children and cousins I am so old I remember Jimmy Cagney
and I actually saw Edgar G. Robinson
one night at an electronic art opening at UCLA
in 1969 with my buddy Jesse Garcia
when I was 18 and life was sweet in the
city of lost angels
because I pulled a high number on the draft lottery
and knew they would never send me to suck up
mud in Vietnam
that same year I realized I wanted absolutely nothing
to do with Hollywood
only write poems
after working eight hours in an office
to survive
not sixteen, twenty on any damn set movie TV or well, yes, maybe on the stage I
still did that, yes, and still do, technically,
when I give a reading yes and yes
sing in a church choir
maybe
but never work for the furcking entertainment industry
(turn on your profanity filter, dear reader)
no, never mind. I'll keep the rest to myself.
no gay casting couch for me no
some things should be free
not bought
but but where was I?
oh yes I slept yesterday afternoon, that's what started all this
I did.
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I took a long, sweet nap, dreaming of my father coming home again
Ramon's worker Gonzago saw me through the back window curled up on my bed.
Snoozing while he cleaned up dog poop (the world IS unfair) and washed away
their fresh piss from our balcony (sometimes I slip him twenty pesos without
telling Ramón). Later I hear that the boss was yelling again Oh that pinche gringo
he never works just sleeps all day long and goes to the library and plays on
computers and then goes to art openings and sucks up their free wine and won't
even mind getting down on his knees to suck their CENCSORED CENSNSOROSND
While the fact is I tend to avoid art openings now, unless it is something
by someone I know and want to support them by being there
although truth be told I really should be writing about those events not my
selfish little boring life reading and writing and reading and writing and
eating and sleeping and reading and writing and reading and writing and
well tonight there is an art opening I am going to
I know half the artists and
well, you go live somewhere
for five years and you start
to know people yes
and your poems, Gringo [he says to me]
they're nothing but piles of words stacked up going nowhere
without any sound or fury and certainly no conclusion
where is your conclusion you must have a conclusion everyone must
have a conclusion
*sigh*
you must understand
I actually LIKE the guy
he is a bloody fanny spanking native of this crazy town
full of whores and bars and postmodern burros painted like
zebras he gives insight into this burg at the edge of the world
but I refuse to stay up drinking with him afterhours in his restaurant
that does not exist I will not go there
so I took a nap, then went out to the computers (again)
and came back to eat Chinese around the corner down past the park
and to bed again full of rice and vegetables and monosodium glutamate
they call it "savor" incidentally
if you want no MSG in your chinese food you say
SIN SAVOR por favor
which HEHeeee heee literally means "without flavor" ho ho ho
or perhaps "without flavorING" would be a more accurate translation yes
so I went back home again and read some more of my book on AngloSaxon England
and fell asleep around around eleven
all of which
nap and night
meant I woke up
at Five A.M. to scribble
this first draft in my little notebook
and went out through the predawn streets at 05:49 to where I shall type
this all into cyberspace while morning comes up outside and the world goes to
work
me too I suppose I choose this work this madness of word crisis yes
word word word letter letter letter
"it's funny how I find myself in love with you"
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it's my life don't you forget it it's my life it never ends
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but it will end. I will die. The fragrant flowers will fade, the beautiful
poems I have read (maybe not so much written)
shall echo into
no t h i n g n e s s
"Oh yes, my friend"
is it not so? perhaps you don't realize it yourself?
(these are echoes from an Aztec poem 600 years ago)
so I shall go
so I shall walk through the streets at dawn
I like to do this
I wrote about this shining darkness once
and so I walk through the streets at dawn listening, watching, tasting reality
glancing at the scattered one or two who sleep on the street nearby my house
catching a look in the eyes of one or another early morning workers headed
off to a day at one job or another
the look in the eyes, a universal question, what gets you up before dawn
a look in his eyes that is culturally different
but biologically and organically the same
the taxi stands are beginning to get ready
for their morning rush
somewhere someone is shouting in the distance
is it possible the street preachers
are already at it
up and at 'em
boy god
cathedral chimes bong bong bong belong belong belong
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a taxi beeps at me - that's what I get for wearing clean clothes
on 2nd street the morning traffic is beginning to rush toward the border
I PAUSE BEFORE THE HEART the corner of 2nd and Constitution
where the diagonal plaza of Santa Cecilia points toward the old
city palace now the arts&culture institute being gutted and rebuilt
for who knows what future on the edge
and
there, down the block, is the yellow 2-storey internet cafe
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
more coffeeeeeee
and typing
but now it is all over
I h a v e a r r i v e d
w h e r e I b e g a n
and it is time to say
okei bai okay bye
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