Relm:  Daddy, daddy!  Guess what I learned in school today!  I learned how to write in cursive!

Clyde:  Cursive?!  Why on earth do you need to know that?!  Vector is REALLY lowering it's standards.

Strago:  Relm!  Take off that hideous fake mustache!

Relm:  I'm not wearing it.

Strago:(Squints), Are you sure?

Clyde:  Strago, you're getting WAY too senile.

Relm:  Oh well, I'm gonna grow up to be an artist!

Clyde:  I'll have none of that!  My girl isn't going to grow up to be an artist, at least not while I'm alive.

Strago:  Oh Clyde, let her do what she wants to do.

Clyde:  NEVER!  She'd make an excellent assassin, with my training, that is.

Strago:  No way.  My little granddaughter is not going to grow up to kill people.

Clyde:  You don't have a say in this, old man!

Relm:  Um, what about m.... never mind.  Tomorrow is the day my teacher gets fired!

Clyde and Strago:  WHAT?  Why is Mr. Kefka getting... oh.....

Relm:  heh heh, we're gonna have substitutes until the cows come home!

Clyde: Hmm..... this gives me an idea

Clyde:  Good morning principal Buttsavage.

Buttsavage:  Good morning Mr. Arowny

Clyde:  I'm here to apply for the teacher's job.

Buttsavage:  Ok, just fill out this form.

(Celes enters room after 2 hours)

Clyde:  (Huff)  (Puff), I... finally.... finished.

Celes:  You aren't actualy thinking of hiring Clyde here for the job of teaching, are you?!

Buttsavage:  Why not, oh great leader?

Celes:  BECAUSE HE'S AN ASSASSIN!

Buttsavage:  Oh, well we'll have none of that here.  I'm sorry Mr. Arowny, but we can't hire you.

Clyde:  But, but, but, I wasted all that time making up the.. I mean filling out the form!

Celes:  heh heh, oh well Clyde.  See ya later.

Clyde:  Grrrrrr......  I'll get you for this, Celes!  One way or another!

Buttsavage:  I guess it didn't really matter anyway, there's only 2 more weeks of school left.

Clyde:  Until Summer?  Hmmm.......

Clyde:  Hello, Mr. Mercos.  I would like to buy some property.

Mercos:  Ok, where would you prefere?

Clyde:  Somewhere safe and secluded.

Mercos:  Well, we have a nice opening at Baron Falls.  A nice little island just rose up from the river.  Full of lush, green grass and..... aw, who am I kidding, it's just a big dirt clod-like island.

Clyde:  I'll take it!  And I would like to buy a Big Castle that's futuristic and such.

Mercos:  Well, we have the most futuristic housing ever made to man kind.  And thanks to the technology of the Epoch, it's the best technology we would EVER have!

Clyde:  Cool!  How much for the whole thing?

Mercos: 1,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 GP.

Clyde:  Geez, I'm not even going to try and pronounce THAT number!  I'll bet even WICKED couldn't afford that!

Mercos:  He couldn't.  I've checked.

Clyde:  Well, time to put in the ads.

(AD:  Assassin for hire.  Will take any job.)

Celes:  I got a job.

Clyde:  Really?  What?

Celes:  But I gave it to Yuffie

Clyde:  WHY?!  She sucks!

Celes:  She works cheap.

Clyde:  Grumble, grumble.  Then why'd you ask me here?

Celes:  GUARDS!

(In prison)

Clyde:  Hey guard, I'll give you something if you come here.

Guard (Kefka):  Ok

(BONK)

Kefka:  Where's this thing?

Clyde: Hmmm..... (Throws star and hits Kefka in chest)

Kefka:  I'm waiting.....

Clyde:  AAH!  (Slits Kefka's throat)

Kefka:  You liar!  (Goes back to work)

Clyde:  I don't understand it!  Am I THIS bad an assassin?  I mean, we could've killed Kefka with his power using bare hands, and no armor!

Kefka:  Zzzzz

Clyde:  Oh well (Opens door, and leaves)

Strago:  Clyde!  I'm Very dissapointed in you!  What kind of an example is this for Relm?

Clyde:  I stole money from Kefka!  How he got it, I have no clue.

(On TV)

Reporter:  And, in other news, a crazy clown like man attacked the charity fundraiser to help disabled clowns.

Clyde:  I can use this money, to buy that house!

Clyde:  Here's the money, now gimme!

Mercos:  Wow!  Ok, I'll put our team of experts RIGHT on it!

(Soon enough, it was made)

Clyde:  Our new home!

Relm:  But daddy, what about my friends?

Clyde:  Honey, Summer's coming up, and besides, you'll make new friends.

Relm:  How?  Like you said, Summer's coming up.

Clyde:  You'll see, in due time.

Strago:  My my, how the day's go by so quickly!

Relm:  Daddy, daddy.  In the news paper it had a front page article on how we have a new house, and something about a Ninja School.

Clyde:  I know, I know.  The police'll probably try and shut us down soon enough.

*Ding dong*

Leo:  I'm shutting down this operat........?  (Sees a bunch of Amish folk standing in front of him)

Amish young man:  I assure you sir, I have no clue as to what you are talking about.  Now will you please excuse us?  We have to churn some butter.  (Pushes him out the door, pulls a lever, and he goes flying away on a spring)

Strago:  ZZZzzzzzzzz......

Clyde (Taking off the costume):  You moron, wake your old self up!  The students will be coming here any minute!

*Ding dong*

Clyde:  That must be them!

Lots and lots of kids:  We wanna become Ninjas.

Clyde:  Eeeeeexelleeeent......

Mysterious squeeky voice:  Me too!  Me too!  I wanna master this course, like I fail... I mean mastered my last one!

Clyde:  Oh god no!

Yuffie:  Hiya Teach!  What's up!

Clyde *groan*.  Hi... Yuffie.....

Yuffie:  We're gonna have such fuuuuun.

Clyde:  Yep, *sigh* yep we are.........