- Imagine, una canción algo conocida pero modificada para dedicársela a un relativamente bien conocido sistema operativo.
- Write In C, otra canción de The Beatles Programmers. Adivinen cual es.
- Bill Gates Mozo. No comments.
- Cómo Microsoft ayudó a un helicóptero en problemas, acerca del servicio técnico en línea de Microsoft.
- El Tao de la Programación. Sabiduría Oriental mezclada con bits.
- The Online Book of Genesis, de cómo dios hizo al mundo usando Unix.
- Top Secret Microsoft Code
- Giggles Galore, un montón de links.
Imagine
Imagine there's no WINDOWS
It's easy if you try
No fatal errors or new bugs
To kill our hard drives
Imagine Mr. Bill Gates
Leaving us in peace!
Imagine neverending hard disks
It isn't hard to do
Nothing to del or wipe off
And no floppy too
Imagine Mr. Bill Gates
Sharing all his world
You may say I'm a hacker
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And our games will fit in RAM
Imagine 1-giga RAM
I wonder if you can
No need for left-shift or setups
And no booting again and again
Imagine all Operating Systems
Working all life-time!
You may say I'm a hacker
But I'm not the only one
Maybe someday I'll become a cracker
Then I'll make my WINDOWS run!
Write In C
Friends and colleagues come to me,
Speaking words of wisdom:
"Write in C."
As the deadline fast approaches,
And bugs are all that I can see,
Somewhere, someone whispers:
"Write in C."
Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, oh, Write in C.
LOGO's dead and buried,
Write in C.
I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,
For science it worked flawlessly.
Try using it for graphics!
Write in C.
If you've just spent nearly 30 hours,
Debugging some assembly,
Soon you will be glad to
Write in C.
Write in C, Write in C,
Write in C, yeah, Write in C.
BASIC's not the answer.
Write in C.
Write in C, Write in C
Write in C, oh, Write in C.
Pascal won't quite cut it.
Write in C.
Extraído de http://www.rdrop.com/~giggles/GG/write-in-c.html
Bill Gates y su Sopa (o Acerca del Microsoft Technical Support)
- Cliente:
- ¡Mozo!
- Cliente:
- ¡Hay una mosca en mi sopa!
- B. Gates:
- Buenas, mi nombre es Bill y seré su camarero de servicio técnico. ¿Que problema cree que tiene?
- B. Gates:
- Pruébela de nuevo, quizá la mosca no esté ahí esta vez
- Cliente:
- No, todavía está ahí.
- B. Gates:
- Quizá es la forma en la que está Ud. usando la sopa. Pruebe a comerla con un tenedor.
- Cliente:
- Aunque usara un tenedor, la mosca seguiría ahí
- B. Gates:
- A lo mejor la sopa es incompatible con la taza: ¿qué clase de taza está Ud. usando?
- Cliente:
- ¡Una taza para SOPA!
- B. Gates:
- Hmmm, eso debería funcionar. A lo mejor es un problema de configuración. ¿Cómo está configurada la taza?
- Cliente:
- Usted me la trajo con un plato. ¿que tiene eso que ver con que haya una mosca en mi sopa?
- B. Gates:
- ¿Puede recordar todo lo que hizo antes de encontrar la mosca en su sopa?
- Cliente:
- ¡Me senté y pedí la Sopa del Día!
- B. Gates:
- ¿Ha pensado actualizarse a la última versión de La Sopa del Día?
- Cliente:
- ¿Tiene usted más de una Sopa del Día cada día?
- B. Gates:
- Sí, la Sopa del Día es cambiada cada hora.
- Cliente:
- Bueno, ¿cual es la Sopa del Día ahora?
- B. Gates:
- La Sopa del Día actual es de tomate
- Cliente:
- Estupendo. Tráigame la sopa de tomate. Se me está haciendo tarde.
(B. Gates: se va y vuelve con otra taza de sopa)
- B. Gates:
- Aquí tiene, señor. Su sopa.
- Cliente:
- Esto es sopa de patatas.
- B. Gates:
- Sí, la sopa de tomate aún no está lista.
- Cliente:
- Bueno, tengo mucha hambre. La comeré de todas formas
(B. Gates: se va)
- Cliente:
- ¡Mozo! ¡Hay un mosquito en mi sopa!
Cómo Microsoft ayudó a un helicóptero en problemas
Un helicóptero estaba volando sobre Redmond algunos días atras, cuando una falla eléctrica hizo que todos los instrumentos electrónicos de navegación a bordo dejasen de funcionar. Debido a las nubes y a la niebla, el piloto no pudo determinar la posición del helicóptero y por supuesto tampoco la ubicación del aeropuerto.
El piloto vió un enorme edificio, voló hacia el, dió algunos giros, escribió un letrero y lo puso en la ventana del helicóptero. El letrero decía "DONDE ESTOY?" en enormes letras.
La gente en el edificio rápidamente respondió al helicóptero, dibujando un enorme letrero y sosteniéndolo en la ventana. Su letrero decía "ESTAS EN UN HELICÓPTERO".
El piloto sonrió, miró en su mapa, determinó el curso a seguir al aeropuerto SEATAC y aterrizó sin ningún problema.
Después de que estuvieron a salvo, el copiloto preguntó cómo el letrero "ESTAS EN UN HELICÓPTERO" pudo ayudarle a determinar su posición.
El piloto dijo "Supuse que estabamos frente al edificio de Microsoft, pues, al igual que su soporte en línea, me entregaron una técnicamente correcta pero completamente inútil respuesta"
The Online Book of Genesis(How God make Earth with Unix)
In the beginning there was the computer. And God said
:Let there be light!
#Enter user id.
:God
#Enter password.
:Omniscient
#Password incorrect. Try again.
:Omnipotent
#Password incorrect. Try again.
:Technocrat
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.
:Let there be light!
#Unrecognizable command. Try again.
:Create light
#Done
:Run heaven and earth
#And God created Day and Night. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Sunday, March 1.
#Approx. funds remaining: $92.50.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Monday, March 2.
:Let there be firmament in the midst of water and light
#Unrecognizable command. Try again.
:Create firmament
#Done.
:Run firmament
#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Monday, March 2.
#Approx. funds remaining: $84.60.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.
:Let the waters under heaven be gathered together unto one place and let the dry land appear and
#Too many characters in specification string. Try again.
:Create dry_land
#Done.
:Run firmament
#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Tuesday, March 3.
#Approx. funds remaining: $65.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.
:Create lights in the firmament to divide the day from the night
#Unspecified type. Try again.
:Create sun_moon_stars
#Done
:Run sun_moon_stars
#And God divided the waters. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Wednesday, March 4.
#Approx. funds remaining: $54.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
:Create fish
#Done
:Create fowl
#Done
:Run fish, fowl
#And God created the great sea monsters and every living creature that creepeth wherewith the waters swarmed after its kind and every winged fowl after its kind. And God saw there were 0 errors.
#And God logged off at 12:02:00 AM, Thursday, March 5.
#Approx. funds remaining: $45.00.
#And God logged on at 12:01:00 AM, Friday, March 6.
:Create cattle
#Done
:Create creepy_things
#Done
:Now let us make man in our image
#Unspecified type. Try again.
:Create man
#Done
:Be fruitful and multiply and replenish the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the fowl of the air and over every living thing that creepeth upon the earth
#Too many command operands. Try again.
:Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 6 errors.
:Insert breath
#Done
:Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 5 errors.
:Move man to Garden of Eden
#File Garden of Eden does not exist.
:Create Garden.edn
#Done
:Move man to Garden.edn
#Done
:Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 4 errors.
:Copy woman from man
#Done
:Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 3 errors.
:Insert woman into man
#Illegal parameters. Try again.
:Insert man into woman
#Done
:Run multiplication
#Execution terminated. 2 errors.
:Create desire
#Done
:Run multiplication
#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
:Create freewill
#Done
:Run freewill
#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
:Undo desire
#Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
:Destroy freewill
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
:Help
#Desire cannot be undone once freewill is created.
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
:Create tree_of_knowledge
#And God saw man and woman being fruitful and multiplying in Garden.edn
#Warning: No time limit on this run. 1 errors.
:Create good, evil
#Done
:Activate evil
#And God saw he had created shame.
#Warning system error in sector E95. Man and woman not in Garden.edn. 1 errors.
:Scan Garden.edn for man, woman
#Search failed.
:Delete shame
#Shame cannot be deleted once evil has en activated.
:Destroy freewill
#Freewill is an inaccessible file and cannot be destroyed.
#Enter replacement, cancel, or ask for help.
:Stop
#Unrecognizable command. Try again
:Break
:Break
:Break
#ATTENTION ALL USERS *** ATTENTION ALL USERS: COMPUTER GOING DOWN FOR REGULAR DAY OF MAINTENANCE AND REST IN FIVE MINUTES. PLEASE LOG OFF.
:Create new world
#You have exceeded your allocated file space. You must destroy old files before new ones can be created.
:Destroy earth
#Destroy earth
#Please confirm.
:Destroy earth confirmed
#COMPUTER DOWN *** COMPUTER DOWN. SERVICES WILL RESUME SUNDAY, MARCH 8 AT 6:00 AM. YOU MUST SIGN OFF NOW.
#And God logged off at 11:59:59 PM, Friday, March 6.
#Approx. funds remaining: $0.00.
Top Secret Microsoft Code
