“Sephiroth!!” said Cloud, as if on the recieving end of a particularly nasty bolt 3 spell.
“Call me a liar if you must.” Said Vincent “But isn’t he dead? The fact that Cloud Killed him would suggest that he is.”
“He could still be alive” Murmered Aeris. “I mean, he fooled us with that “Being dead” routine before, didn’t he?”
“Who cares if he’s dead or alive? Let’s find him, and bust him up for good! Right Barret?” Yelled Cid.
“Dam’ Shinra!” Screamed Barret. The rest of the crew ignored him.
“Anyone know where he is?” Exclaimed Cloud.
“We heard he was at the nothern crater.” Said Tifa.
“Geez, what an idiot.” Said Yuffie. “Couldn’t he pick a more original place?”
“Get Cait Sith and Red XIII” Said Cloud, jumping from his chair. “We’re going to the Northern Crater.”.
“There’s just one burning question.....” Mumbled Vincent.
“What diabolical plan Sephiroth is scheming to make real his evil lust for power?” Interrupted Aeris.
“No” Replied Vincent. “The burning question is......”
“How can this insignificant band topple the incredible power and strength of the mighty Sephiroth?” Interrupted Tifa.
“No!” Shouted Vincent. “The burning question is....HOW THE HELL ARE 9 OF US GOING TO FIT ON 1 CHOCOBO?”

When they reached the Northern Crater, Cloud tied his gold chocobo’s leash around a tree, and Cloud, Barret and Cid clattered and bounded down a steep hill of falling rocks. Vincent, Aeris, Tifa, Cait sith, Yuffie and Red XIII took the escalator. When they reached the bottom of the crater, they regrouped and saw
Sephiroth sitting on a stool reading a newspaper, and smoking a cigarette. When he noticed the group staring at him in disbelief, he threw the newspaper to the ground, spat ou the cigarette and leapt up to face them.
“Aaaah! Cloud. I’ve been expecting you.”Said sephiroth through an evil smile.
“You defeated me in the video game, but now, through the medium of this ridiculous, low-grade parody, I shall have the revenge I deserve.”
The group looked at each other and then at Sephiroth, who continued his speech.
“You and your pitiful crew foiled my evil plan to crash an enormous meteor into the planet, drain the lifestream that flows out to heal the wound by absorbing it into my being, and become a god, but my new plan will destroy you all!”
The crew stared at Sephiroth with extremely bored looks.
“Who needs Sleepel with this guy around?” Muttered Yuffie.
“So what exactly is your new plan?” Asked Cloud.
“Aaah Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.......You worthless humans are so impatient!” Screamed Sephiroth. Aeris stepped forward “Hey, I’m an Ancient!”
“QUIET” Yelled Sephiroth. “My new plan will soon come to fruition. I shall create a new crisis by crashing this planet into another planet on the opposite side of the solar system. The immense distance they will be forced to travel will accelerate them to the speed of light, and their collision will nearly destroy both planets. I shall then suck the lifestream from BOTH planets, becoming the most powerful being in the universe.” The group gasped in dreaded amazement.
“What other planet are you going to destroy?” Asked Vincent.
“Another planet full of worthless humans” Spat Sephiroth. “The planet EARTH”

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