A tale of two lovers...

Aleesa and K'Ston

I used to frequent a MUD in the not too distant past. On this MUD, my
character and another character had a very long relationship...a friendship
turned courtship. At one point in time, my character became very confused
about her feelings, and wasn't sure about herself or the relationship. In
questioning her feelings, he decided that what was best for them was time.
In doing so, they were pushed away from each other. This is her tale, to
him in poetry, of her feelings. (And yes, they did get back together)

Appology

My mind cries out. My heart cries out. What have I done?
I can't push you away. I don't want to push you away. What have I done?
What I've done, I yell at my foolish heart for.
What I've done, I scream at my senseless mind for.
You try to talk to me. My ears refuse to hear. What have I done?
You try to open up to me. I start to walk away. What have I done?
What I've done, is ignore my screaming heart.
What I've done, is ignore my frantic mind.
I try to touch you. My touch feels awkward. What have I done?
I try to speak to you. My words get stuck on my tongue. What have I done?
What I've done, is what I least wished to do.
What I've done, is move too fast for you.
Please help me to do what is right.
Please help me correct what I've done.

To give (our raw selves)

I grow, I learn. Your emotions rarely surface,
though you still try to show them to me.
I show, I yearn. Your love you start to give,
as I try always to show you my own.
I laugh, I cry. Your words make me feel,
my own emotions overpowering anything else.
I smile, I sigh. Your touch is gentle and soft,
hesitating for fear of going too far.

To you

When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
The rain falls upon my face,
slowly moving down like the touch of your fingertips.
When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
The rain is soaked up by the malnourished ground,
which embraces it like the touch of your arms around my body.
When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
The rain cleanses the dust from the air,
revitalizing the plants like your words spark a newness within my mind.
When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
A feeling of purity cascades with each drop,
like the love pulsating through my body as I gaze at your face.
When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
Drops fall off the leaves,
like the tears of sorrow and joy that flow from my eyes.
When it rains, I'm reminded of you.
When we are together, it rains.
When we are apart, I want it to rain
so I can feel close to you always.

AEM - 1998

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