If I was given to flights of fancy and conspiracy theories, I might wonder once again if the one true Superman is still dead or missing.

by Star Bright, stringer for the Underground Daily Planet

Despite the attempt at fairness and the intended lack of bias by Len Collins, this reporter believes that an important aspect of the work by our good-will ambassador, Superman, has been ignored. True, he has been attempting to impose order in a world of chaos. True, he has no time for debate with those who will not give him time for explanation. True, he is no longer with his wife. All these things make Superman a fascist whose unbending goal of world domination is intolerable and ultimately evil---FALSE!!!!

First is the fact that the world is a mess. In Brazil, off-duty police officers acting in hit-squads kill children the way we kill rats-to improve life and (particularly) business. (Keeping the streets clear for all those people who have money.) In Nicaragua and other parts of the world, the people are still troubled by the effects of hurricanes and earthquakes. People are homeless due to the ravages of Lexcorp. People of China are thrown into jail for speaking their minds; and, these same people find themselves shipped off to internment camps where their organs are harvested to provide the government with operating funds. Superman is working to change these things. How can anyone with a conscience speak against actions intended to change such evils…despite the “political correctness” of the Clinton Administration.

Second, is the fact that Superman is willing to speak to those with an open mind. He demonstrated this fact when he took time out of his busy schedule to stop in Manchester to give aid to Impulse and, again, when he rejoined Impulse to allow both Impulse and Superboy to explain what they had to say to Superman. Though, Superman did not have time to talk to Superboy when he, Steel, and Supergirl called him for a confrontation, he was willing to openly discuss any questions or concerns with Superboy in an open and honest forum. Superboy’s timidity in the face of his mentor is all that stopped him from expressing concerns. Superman was ready and willing to work through any conflicts. In fact, after these encounters, Impulse has begun to rethink his entire life strategy and would like to join Superman in his endeavors.

Lois Lane chose to stay with her profession and her life. She could have gone with Superman to his fortress of Solitude and made it her home, but no, she would not share his life. She knew he was the ultimate Superhero when she married him. Superman is first and foremost a defender of truth, justice, and humanity. Any woman who is so blessed as to marry Superman should get down on her knees and thank God above for the opportunity to have such a wonderful man. I feel no pity for the woman who could callously spurn such an incredible opportunity just to sit at a computer terminal like I do.

Superman is a good and loving man who has been endowed with gifts and abilities far greater than the average mortal man. If, in his quest to bring about safety and harmony in the world, a few radicals and weirdoes kill each other or feel that their freedoms are impinged,; Superman should not be held accountable. Does the dog feel bad when a tick dies? Of course not. Neither should the world cry when one of the many bloodsuckers of mankind is pulled loose from the bloodstream of humanity.

Let humanity rejoice in the love of Superman and know the world is blessed to have this protector. This is not the Millenium of Christ’s rule on Earth, but it just may be the best rest we will ever have on the road to Armageddon. Go about your life. Be happy. Enjoy the peace and contentment you have always wanted. Know that you are able to enjoy this gift from God: Superman, the world’s bodyguard.

Editor’s note: In light of the recent events that transpired during the ongoing Kingdom and hyperverse debacle, let us keep in mind that you, our reader, may not live in a world where Lois Lane married Superman. You may not even live in a world where Superman has revealed himself. Do not trouble the Lois Lane of your Universe/World. She may not even have met Superman or his parents. Further, the views expressed above are those of a freelance reporter, or, stringer as we call them.

Here at the Planet, our suspicion is that Star Bright is in fact one Lana Lang, a woman who was rejected by Superman in our reality. In fact, she was the one who revealed the identity of Superman to the world just three short years ago. Now, still blinded by her love, we believe she is writing the majority of all Superman propaganda and putting it out under pseudonyms.

Lana Lang does this because her credibility is in question. Shortly after revealing the identity of Superman, she began a campaign of attacks on this same Superman. She abandoned the tenants of good reporting and fabricated a large number of “facts” to support her wild accusations and to promote attacks on Superman by other journalists. However, these “other journalists” did not join in the attacks. Instead they researched and exposed Lana Lang for the fraud she was and is today. Please keep these things in mind as you consider the “’rebuttal’ by Star Bright.”

Superman Movie Flies Again
Recently I received an e-mail telling me that the Superman movie looks like it is on again. They have apparently done what I said I would do. They have gotten a script that won't cost them so much and are making Nicholas Cage work for his money. This information came to me from Victor Oddy...and before him from J. Ryan in the Daily Variety. I don't think I want to go into the relist of the many potential actors for the upcoming film, but Ryan seems to think it is very likely that Nicholas Cage will not be backing out of the production, but he did say that Tim Burton's agent would not comment and that the likelihood of Burton staying with the production was "cloudy."

The fact that Burton is very well liked by comic book fans as a general rule, does not change the fact that he does not play well with others (reportedly). Not that I know this personally, but the reports always paint him as an individual who likes to take total control of the "vision" of a film. He is said to be the reason the script from Kevin Smith turned into a reported 140 to 200 million dollar script. Ryan suggests that the new script could bring the film in at less than 100 million dollars.

You might wonder why Warner feels it is necessary to bring an action hero like Cage to a project like Superman. The fact that the first major Superman feature starred a relative unknown: Christopher Reeve, and turned him into a major star would seem to indicate that the role of Superman does not need such a "box office draw" actor. The fact that the first Reeve's film made over 300 million dollars might indicate that American viewers like Superman. But things have changed a lot in Hollywood. The perception is that the story and characters are not as important as the personal draw of the actors and the magnitude of the special effects. With the current thinking it would seem Warner Brothers would likely drop Cage if Leonardo Dicaprio winked at them.

DiCaprio is in fact thought to be a major reason for caution. Many older film stars have seen their projects dropped or put of hold in light of the perceived "new audience." The idea is that suddenly a group of young female viewers came out of nowhere and fell in love with a stalwart, baby-faced, young man named Leonardo. In this view, film makers did not make money on recent films because they had the wrong man as star. Maybe they are right. I won't say that there was a strange or unusual storyline in "Titanic" or that seeing a ship sink is so unusual. However, I might suggest that the romance and mystery surrounding a familiar legend presented in an appealing manner might truly be the star of "Titanic."

I do not deny that Leonardo DiCaprio is an actor who appeals to young women, but I would have said the same thing about Christopher Reeve twenty years ago. Perhaps the truth about Hollywood is that it has not changed. Maybe only the current perception is different. The first Reeve's film took years to finally be brought to the public. Rumors showed up in major news publications as early as they have for this film. The DC representatives I talked to in 1993 were keeping their fingers crossed in hopes that the licensing for Superman would continue to be unused so that Warner could go through with its plans for a major blockbuster that would overshadow the Reeve's films. Hollywood is always full of hope and fear. The studios skrink in fear and jump at every shadow when a film like "Speed 2" opens up; and, then they puff up and pronounce victory when "Titanic" blows into town. The same studio, Twentieth Century Fox, is responsible for both of these films and the same fear that resulted from "Speed 2" resulted in a lion's share of the profits from "Titanic" falling into the coffers of Paramount.

Whatever happens, maybe we should be satisfied if any kind of Superman movie gets made. And, if it does well enough, maybe the next one will be better. But remember, if we don't pay to see the first one, they won't make the second one.