1) Join your dog for a refreshing swim in the toilet
2) Name all of your brain cells MT
3) Take your toothpaste for a walk around the block
4) Ask the old water buffalo across the street if he's your mother
5) Grow a hair-ball tree
6) Change you name to Matilda Stefflebean
7) Marry Winklelunterlogan
8) Replace your cat liter with potatoes
9) Sing the chipmunk surfin' dude song in backwards Japanese while wearing a red tweed hat
10) Eat peanut butter, steak, mustard, bubble gum, and baked bean pies by the dozen
11) Put a feather in your hat and call it macaroni
12) Do your homework
13) Watch Sailor Moon
14) Turn yourself inside out
15) Sniff tables
16) Raise a room full of killer dust bunnies
17) Dress up as a spoonful of mayonnaise for Halloween
18) Don't wash your feet or change your socks for five years and then make toe jam soup....If anyone asks what the ingredients are say it's your little secret
19) Go to school wrapped up in fried blue hot dog wrappers
20) Claim you shook hands with Barney and didn't even faint due to his endless beauty
21) Attach an ice monster to your knee and feed him cheese daily
22) Grow fingers on your face
23) Collect knuckle hairs from famous celebrities
24) Alphabetize your sock drawer by height
25) Spell it wrong
26) Get contacts that glow in the dark
27) Confine your wardrobe to only New Kids on the Block clothes
28) Walk like a turnip
29) Snort a lot
30) Never stop smiling
31) Laugh endlessly when you sense impending doom
32) Go national with your flea circus
33) Invent deodorant that smells like burning hair and macaroni
34) Sell fingernail polish by the gallon
35) Fill your hot tub with microwaved ice cream sundaes
36) Cough up hair-balls
37) Whenever you get mad, just scream "I love ya man!"
38) Develop a phobia of oxygen
39) Pretend your hand is permanently attached to your forehead
40) Dye your skin blue and grow wings
41) Claim Everett is better than Marysville
42) Make up 101 verses to Mary Had a Little Lamb and sing them to the governor
43) Ask your lint remover to go to the movies
44) Give your orthodontist a woodpecker for Christmas
45) Don't do anything BUT blink for a twelfth of a year
46) Recite the capitols of all 67 states
47) Have plastic surgery done on your armpit
48) Glue all of your trash to your neighbor's car
49) Talk to your socks
50) Never stop moving your eyes
51) Wear five pairs of suspenders
52) Boil your dental floss
53) Write Chadder Rocks in yellow food coloring in your front yard
54) Lie on your back and eat water in a pile of cement named Farfanoogen
55) Join a band called the Enormous, Gastronomical Raiders of the Broccoli Chompers from Peanut Butter Jolly Rancher Land
57) Do a one man raid of the local police department
58) Smash a jar of fingernail polish remover over your head
59) Ask everyone if they knew anyone who graduated in 1703
60) Start every sentence with the word aardvark
61) Spell your name wrong on the SATs
62) Get a license to hunt dinosaurs
63) Write a dictionary of things that begin with the letter z
64) Eat with the wrong end of your spoon
65) Send your stuffy next door neighbor 70 pounds o' pink Ping-Pong balls
66) Smile and say "cultured milk aged over 60 days!"
67) Have your favorite roll of toilet paper plated in gold and hang it from your kitchen ceiling
68) Go on a strictly bug diet
69) Invent the one and only solar powered flashlight
70) Paint half your house plaid, the other half paisley, the other half polka dotted, and then stripe the trim!
71) Run around in circles and scream that scary monsters in white coats are coming to take you to their mother ship
72) Jump up and down and imitate a flying ball of mudd pie every time someone says the word "the"
73) Think with your teeth
74) Laugh like Chadder
56) Spontaneously begin to sway during lunch
75) Order a new life from K-mart
76) The word is a tree so the leaf is a bough
77) Do your country report on Marysville
78) Play baseball with a purple bowling ball
79) Clean your mouth out with Windex
80) Blow bubbles in your spaghetti
81) Act like a platypus
82) Brush your teeth with a yard flamingo
83) Eat a sugarless, semisweet, chocolate chip cookie
84) Try saying Wild Whales think Sailor Hedgehog Rocks Da Noodle ten times fast
85) Paint your stainless steal silverware turquoise
86) Purchase a pet fish food container from the library
87) Count the number of babblefish that you own
88) Count to one backwards
89) Run around the house screaming "There's no cheese, Gromitt!"
90) Be a stowaway on the big red boat by being a stowaway in some crazy lady's ugly pajamas
91) Wash your pudding before eating it
92) Smear Ketchup on your popcorn
93) Eat the one and only liver and bacon flavored sausage
94) Inhale a spontaneously combusting piece of glass
95) Put a leash on your sink and take yourself for a little walk
96) Never use contractions
97) Develop a wacky wild Cool-aid style
98) Style your hair so it looks exactly like Marge Simpsons
99) Bark on command
100) Go swimming in a Barney-gator pit
101) Sing "Stop in the Name of Super Pencils"
102) Grow cemented grass
103) Always keep your extra sleeve supply up to date
104) Forget the punch line to "Why did the Chicken cross the road?"
105) Glue your big toe to an ice cream truck
106) Be a door fairy
107) Buy a years supply of frozen cheese whiz
108) Declare war on Lynwood
109) Sit up straight
110) Subscribe to the retainer of the month club
111) Go into the professional hula hooping business
112) Paint your hair orange and say your an avocado
113) Glare continuously while breaking out in periodic, long lasting grins
114) Develop a hobby of cutting everything around you
115) Mow your cherry tree and vacuum out your pool
116) Dress up like Rennie and claim that you can fly
117) Install a boom box where your nose formally was
118) Get an appendix ring
119) Pretend your a clock and tick
120) Grow a tail
121) Make your head really big so you look like a high government official in one of those political cartoons
122) Buy a powdered computer- just add water
123) Chew pavement on a regular basis
124) Super glue your finger up your nose
125) Make a list of all the foods you can think of beginning with the letter Q
126) Buy your cat a Porsche for St.Patricks Day
127) Crack your eyelid
128) Fill bananas with helium and feed them to chimps so that they can fly
129) Play hide and go seek by yourself
130) Watch television fuzz
131) Dress up like Earthworm Jim
132) Believe in Fairy Winkles
133) Take a dive in old Faithful
134) Attend procrastinators annonymouse regularly
135) Seek professional help from a psychiatrist named Dr. Insane drooling guy with bad breath
136) Go to the mall draped in four chairs and a tablecloth
137) Take a ride on the back of a great white shark named Intestines Be Gone!
138) Go fly an anvil
139) While in a port-a-potty start swatting invisible flies
140) Take your family on vacation to the Ritzville McDonalds
141) Use your head as your major mode of transportation
142) Pound you fists into a taxi and scream "I want my dermatologist!"
143) Hum the forgotten theme song to David the Gnome
144) Disco Dance to the Skate Deck Bird Song
145) Get your foot stuck in a hairdryer
146) Spend your time writing stupid lists
147) Invent a International Hedgehog Petting Holiday
148) Make a life sized bicycle out of play-dough and cruise the city on it during a rainy day
149) Take a row boat to the MOON
149.63) Leggo My E.....
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