"TOP REASONS WHY
THERE ISN'T A FILIPINO AMERICAN PRESIDENT!!!"
- White House not big enough for in-laws
- Engineering, computer science, & accounting preferred over politics
- Not enough parking at the White House to park the 2 Honda Civics, the Toyota Celica, the 1985 diesel Mercedes-Benz, and the Chrysler Van
- Can't find decent chicken or beef adobo in D.C.
- Secret Service could never handle nagging mother
- Dignitaries generally intimidated by eating with fingers at state dinners
- No chance for promotion
- Lactose intolerance is not considered politically correct
- Senior aides won't take shoes off before coming in
- Too many windows on White House to put metal bars on outside
- Not allowed to install whistle-beep on presidential limo when put in reverse gear
- Too many dining rooms in the White House; where will they put the picture of the Last Supper?
- Could lead to major educational controversy over pronunciation of P's and F's ... "fobonics"
- Too much confusion over the definition of D.C. - District of Columbia OR Daly City?
- White House walls not big enough to hold giant wooden fork and spoon
- FAA won't allow rainbow tape on Air Force One dashboard.
- Secret Service staff won't respond to "psssssst psssssssssssst"
- Secret Service staff uncomfortable driving presidential car with a rosary hanging on rear view mirror and St.Jude statuette on dashboard.
- No more W.W.II jeeps available for restoration as presidential jitneys.
- No more money allocated in budget to purchase karaoke sing-along machines for every room in the White House
- Barrel men do not convey political correctness
- Karaoke parties might disturb the guests in the Lincoln bedroom
- Mah Jong illegally used to raise campaign funds
- Can't send presidential towels as gifts to the Philippines
- Rose garden can't be turned into vegetable garden with tomatoes, squash, ampalaya, mango, jackfruit, lychees, and kalamancee fruit
- Roasted pig might scare the Sierra Club lobby
- Not allowed to turn presidential limo into a conversion van
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