HYPER DOLLS
Because “Lazy Dolls” doesn’t have quite the ring to it
Review by: Craig “Blubber Doll” Norris
Length: 2 episode OAV
Genre: Comedy, action, magical girl
Watched: All, subbed
I’m beginning to like the short OAVs a lot more than the longer series. They don’t require nearly the commitment of time, and if they’re not very good, I don’t feel all that cheated since I likely saw the whole thing in one short sitting. That’s lucky for me, since this OAV certainly wasted what little time I spent watching it.
Plot synopsis: When the world is in danger from giant versions of normally harmless creatures, who will put their lives on the line and save the day? The Hyper Dolls, that’s who. That is, if they’re not busy. Or they’re not in the middle of a meal. Or if they happen to feel like it. But if they have free time and want to fight a giant monster, rest assured they will save us all! Unless they destroy the whole city first.
Artwork: The artwork is pretty much average, except for one interesting aspect: the character designs for the monsters. They are distinguishable as the diminutive creatures they were modeled after, but one or two features are always exaggerated. The anime will be moving along nicely, and all of a sudden you will realize, “Wait a minute... Worms don’t have lips!” As for the human characters, they are fairly bland and standard for city folk. Even the costumes of the Hyper Dolls aren’t very ornate. Then again, with how little those outfits cover, it’s hard to imagine how they could ever be.
Music: The opening/closing song is okay for run-of-the-mill J-pop. The rest is just there because silence is awkward. But I stand by my credo that short comedy series don’t need to have great, or even good, soundtracks. Even excellent songs won’t add too much to an anime that relies so heavily on humor. Therefore, despite the fact that none of the songs on the soundtrack are worth remembering, it’s not to the anime’s discredit.
Characters: The Hyper Dolls are quite possibly the most lackadaisical super heroines the planet has ever seen. Mika Minazuki and Mew Fumizuki are schoolgirls by day, but they are actually super strong aliens who have been dispatched by Central Galaxy to protect the people of Earth from an organization known as Chaos. Though they work well together, they often pick on one another, and in some cases even seem to hate each other. They receive their orders from their Commander, a slug-looking guy who can only speak to them through some sort of flatbread food (such as pizza). After discovering their identities as Hyper Dolls, their classmate Akai is forced to assist them, or risk being dropped from very high up. He is much more concerned about the destruction of the city than Mika and Mew are. Probably because he lives there. Shoko Aida is also Akai’s classmate, and suspects that Mika and Mew are the Hyper Dolls. To protect her, Akai tries to dissuade her from that notion. Shoko also has a big crush on Akai, to which he is appropriately oblivious to. The only thing the giant monsters seem to have working in their favor is that they are pretty big; apparently, their brain power didn’t increase with their size. You haven’t seen pathetic until you see a giant earthworm ask for directions. Aside from laughing about how dumb the big monsters are, there is very little about these characters to like. They all have unremarkable, sometimes aggravating personalities.
Plot: It’s pretty much a monster-of-the-week format. Which means that everything in the anime takes place in two weeks. Aside from the Hyper Dolls fighting giant jellyfish and stuff, there’s not much else going on besides the romantic tension between Shoko and Akai, and Akai getting bullied by Mika and Mew. Unfortunately the lack of energy displayed by the Hyper Dolls rubs off on the plot. After all, if the heroines don’t care, why should we? There are a few laughs to be had, but most of them are from the monsters themselves. And when the main characters get upstaged by giant invertebrates, I’d say there are problems.
CHICKS!: If you like your girls cute, somewhat unfriendly, and freakishly strong, Mika and Mew are quite a pair. Their figures are pretty curvy, and almost identical, with their only real distinguishing features being their eye and hair colors. When spending an evening with them, expect to get teased, possibly ignored, and surely stuck with the bill. Shoko is a bespectacled cutie who also has a very nice figure. When she feels snubbed she has a tendency to get drunk, so once Akai has invariably forgotten about her, it would be easy to swoop in and show her a nice evening. Other than their looks, the chicks aren’t all that remarkable, and amount to little more than eye candy. Still, that’s nothing to be ashamed of in my opinion.
Overall: Two episodes of this certainly aren’t too much of a waste of time, but it’s a good thing it stopped. I don’t see much here that would hold my interest for very long. Although, I do wonder what other crazy monsters could show up if it were allowed to continue. Maybe a giant sea cucumber. Or a big nudebranch! Yeah, spines are for chumps! And just like an invertebrate, this anime doesn’t have much of a backbone to hold it up.
IN A NUTSHELL
+ A few laughs
+ Monsters with goofy personalities
- Unappealing main characters
- No energy outside the monster fights
Rating: 5/10
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