"A story of Hollywood today", in which a liquor store robbery is foiled when the owner shoots him, then some bearded guy gives some douche bag an enema... and thus begins William Shakespeare's famed tragedy, Eating Raoul.
I don't care if Joe Bob Briggs does think this is one of the greatest cannibal films of all times, Joe Bob has been on a major downward spiral lately... I haven't liked him much since he gave Wes Craven’s New Nightmare a 5 star rating and changed “TNT Monstervision” into “Joe Bob’s Hollywood Load of Crap” or whatever he calls it now.
Anyway, a husband and wife couple (who dream of owning a restaurant) are having trouble with bills (not guys named Bill, but stuff like gas and rent and such) and their apartment building is being overrun by swingers (that's bad?). They kill a confused, drunken swinger, swipe his wallet, and stuff him in the trash. Since it works out for them, they decide to parlay it into a profitable hobby, suckering swingers into getting their fantasies fulfilled, only to clock them with a frying pan before they get their money's worth. Too bad for them that Raoul, the locksmith, stumbles upon their monkey shines and blackmails them into letting him in on the festivities.
Raoul disposes of the bodies (selling them to a hot dog company) and sells the valuables for some extra cash too. Raoul then falls for Mary (the wife) and Paul gets paranoid, following Raoul around on his daily routine to spy on him. Paul then hires an actress to try and scare Raoul into forgetting about Mary (probably not in the way you're thinking…), but Raoul finds out it's all a trick and gets mighty pissed. Meanwhile, Paul and Mary (no Peter?) go to a swinger party, throw an electric lamp into a swinger stuffed hot tub, stealing the cash from the ex-breathers, and then selling their cars too. Raoul turns on the couple, then they *whack* him and feed him to their real estate agent, open their restaurant, and live happily ever after. Big fucking deal.
For being one of Joe Bob's favorite "cannibal" movies, this thing had almost NO cannibalism! Sure, the bodies were ground up into hot dogs, but we didn't actually get to see it happen. So, the only real cannibalism was when they were, as the title goes, Eating Raoul. Bah, to Hell with all this crap, I can't believe I paid 38 cents for this damn thing. I'm gonna kill that 5 year old and get my money back....
The Moral of the Story: Murder is a business best left to sharing with your closest friends or loved ones, cuz letting your neighborhood locksmith in on it will only lead to trouble later.
H.O.P.E.L.E.S.S. Rating: 
- It's a comedy and it never takes itself seriously, so it's good for a few group laughs.
If You Liked This Flick, Check Out: Swingers Massacre or Microwave Massacre
FEEDBACK
All materials found within this review are the intellectual properties and opinions of the original writer. The Tomb of Anubis claims no responsibility for the views expressed in this review, but we do lay a copyright claim on it beeyotch, so don't steal from this shit or we'll have to go all Farmer Vincent on your silly asses. © March 5th 2006 and beyond, not to be reproduced in any way without the express written consent of the reviewer and the Tomb of Anubis or pain of a physical and legal nature will follow. Touch not lest ye be touched.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
