Before Hercules was unchained, or against the Moon Men, or slept incessantly on the beach while the secondary characters did all the work, there was Maciste. And he went to Hell. Dig it.
Barbariccia, an upstart wanna-be king in Hell, decides that instead of fighting Pluto for the underworld, he will take over the Earth instead. He heads topside with a band of his best henchmen, but runs into a problem. The world is corrupt and ripe for the taking, but it is defended by the highly moral and immensely strong Maciste. Knowing he can’t simply whup up on Maciste, the devil assumes human form and tries to tempt him with power and gold.
Maciste, being the honest man he is, tells the devil he wants nothing but for Ol’ Scratch to leave, or he’ll throw him out the window. When the devil won’t leave, he PICKS HIM UP AND THROWS HIM THE FUCK OUT THE WINDOW! Dude just heaved the devil out the fucking window! You don’t mess with that kind of badass.
Obviously unable to beat or tempt Maciste, Barbariccia goes another route and steals the baby of Maciste’s cousin, Rosabel. Maciste retrieves the infant, and is so pissed that Barbariccia dared mess with his family that he heads down to Hell to bring the battle to the devil’s doorstep. Once in Hell, he single-handedly beats the holy living shit out of a whole army of lesser demons before a demoness kisses him and turns him into a demon himself.
He gets caught up in the middle of a civil war between Barbariccia and Pluto, and after handing Barbariccia’s ass back to him on a stick for a second time, Pluto rewards him by turning him back into a man and sends him on his way to the surface. Pluto’s treacherous wife, Proserpine, wants him to stay in Hell, so she shackles him to a wall and turns him back into a demon. Years pass, and Rosabel’s son, now several years old, prays on Christmas day for Maciste’s return. Since we all know that a child’s prayer on Christmas has the power to free a soul, Maciste is freed from Hell and returns home to be with his family.
The plot has a bit of Dante about it, and Bartolomeo Pagano apparently made a career of playing Maciste, beginning in 1914 with a flick called Cabiria and ending (at least that I could find) in 1927 with Gigante delle Dolomite II, with 28 Maciste movies in all. Seems like Mr. Pagano was the first franchise character in movie history - the first Godzilla, if you will.
This is probably the coolest silent movie I’ve ever seen. The images of Hell are awesome. It’s all well and good to be a great FX artist these days, but everything’s been seen and done, and it’s all just who can do the best copy of something that’s come before. At the time this was made, no one had seen giant monsters and flights of battling demons on the screen. These dudes had to make it all up from scratch. That takes some goddamn visionary genius, right there. The scenes of tornados of flying devils, and of Maciste flying around on the dragon, and meeting Satan (who basically looks like he did on the Tenacious D artwork, but with a ‘fro), and PUNCHING THE FUCKING HEADS OFF OF DEMONS are alternately awe-inspiring and hilarious and chilling, and sometimes all three at the same time.
Barbariccia in human form is the most over-the-top vaudeville Snidely Whiplash villain to prance across my screen with a cape draped over his face in a while, and Maciste chucking his mustache-twirling ass out the window is alone worth the price of admission. The giant monsters are…well, they look like giant monsters made with 1925 technology. They’re big, sleepy-eyed puppets with fire shooting out of their mouths.
If you’re looking for a little silent movie action that doesn’t reek of German expressionist pretentiousness, you’ve found it. If you’re looking for a movie to show to your friends after a three-course meal of hallucinogenic mushrooms, you’ve found it. Dude, those words tasted like colors! If you’re looking for a movie that, with nothing but some dialogue cards, a little piano music, and a beefy Italian guy, out-awesomes 95% of all other movies in history, you’ve found it.
The Moral of the Story: If you pester beefy Italian guys, they will throw your ass out a window.
H.O.P.E.L.E.S.S. Rating: 
- You can crack jokes, or just sit back and enjoy the awesome. Either way, you’re in for a treat.
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