Twenty years from now the world is fucked. Some mystery phenomenon from 18 years prior has left the world’s women infertile. The ones who were pregnant at the time all had miscarriages and the rest went straight up sterile. Besides meaning an eventual end to all civilization as we know it, the nations of the world decided to put aside their differences and work together to solve the mystery… I’m kidding of course, as everyone jumped on the opportunity to push their shiny red buttons. New York’s been nuked, the Middle East is in ruins and the rest of the world is pure chaos and good old fashioned pandemonium. The only place left on Earth that hasn’t been otherwise raped with mayhem and strife is the UK. As such, it’s become the number one squat spot for the planet’s refugees trying to escape the unbearable living conditions of their home countries. But, the party’s officially over thanks to a government edict that any and all illegal immigrants are to be rounded up and shipped out!... and by shipped out, we mean that most of them are pretty much guaranteed to wind up on the business end of a peacekeeper’s gun barrel. As you can imagine, this has led to a really unstable climate throughout the country as the nation starts taking sides, some more “pro-active” (i.e. violent) than others. The shit’s on a fastball pitch toward the fans folks.
But, all of this is just the setting for the story of Theo Faron (Clive Owen). Theo’s your everyday office jockey, living his day-to-day life of work and coffee and falling behind on his rent. As the rest of the world goes to shit around him, Theo’s kidnapped (well, “mannapped” would probably be a better term…) by a group of pro-refugee activists (the government would call them “terrorists”) who happen to be led by his ex Julian (Julianne Moore). Seems the two originally met back in the days of political rallies when anti-government groups were about hanging out and picking up some of that “free love” hippie stuff, but whereas Theo got a job after realizing that making protest signs and not bathing couldn’t pay the rent (not that he’s paying it now…), Jules kept fighting the good fight. Now, she and her refugee lovin’ amigos need Theo’s connections in the government to get them travel papers for a very special piece of human cargo named Kee: an illegal immigrant and the first pregnant woman to grace the surface of the Earth in almost two decades.
Children of Men isn’t an entirely original concept. As far as post-apocalyptic worlds, there’s little to distinguish this one from the myriad other dystopian futures we’ve been dragged to over the years. I could swear I’ve even seen the whole “humanity unable to give birth” angle used more than once too. As far as “messages” go, the movie is subtle as a big frozen Red Snapper being smacked upside your head on it’s lessons, the most obvious one being that illegal immigrants are people too and we just may need them to save the world some day, so we’d better be nice and share this planet because we’re all the children of Mother Earth and blah blah blah blah blah. The only real pro for the writing would have to be the various “HOLY SHIT!” moments that not only bitch slap you out of nowhere, but hit you repeatedly when they do happen, giving you just enough time to calm down from the last before getting another right between the eyes. If any of this is new or appealing to you, then go out and rent the movie right now. For anyone who’s already seen this stuff before though, let me explain why you should see Children of Men.
Huh, what do you know, I started and ended that last paragraph with the titles of the movie. I wonder if that means anything…
For starters, the movie is very well acted. Clive Owen is cool and charismatic with just enough “snotty dickhead” to him to make him great. Julianne Moore is sexy (not “trashy”, which too many people confuse with “sexy”) and always charms me like a cobra. Michael Caine, though I sometimes can’t stand the guy, is great as the loveable old stoner with the bleeding heart. Claire-Hope Ashitey plays the “excited but scared” attitude of a young woman about to give birth well enough that you’re almost sure she’s been through it before. Peter Mullan’s short but hilarious stint as the not-all-there law enforcer Syd was fucking beautiful. The rest of the cast was good and I can’t really narrow down how any one of them didn’t do their role well. No complaints.
Beyond the acting, the score was very minimal. Normally I’d piss and moan about it, but here this lack of sound lets the acting and direction take our total focus without what could have otherwise been auditory distractions. What songs are on the soundtrack are mostly covers of various retro-tunes and will either give you a new outlook on the originals, an internal laugh or won’t phase you either way. The budget’s kept in check by the movie’s simple locations, taking place partly in rural woods and on farmland or in locales of blown out buildings. The direction is amazing and makes the movie. Mexican born Alfonso Cuarón (Y Tu Mamá También and Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban) puts us directly into the action, not in the cheesy over dramatic Hollywood sense that some movies try to, but in a fashion that makes you feel like you’re actually part of the movie. In one particular scene we follow Theo through a veritable war zone, dodging bullets and avoiding explosions trying to get from point A to point B. It so much like being immersed in a video game that I found my fingers twitching a little as I wanted to redirect the camera angle! Sad for me, yes, but fucking beautiful for Cuarón. There’s no way those egg-laying ass parasites of the Academy Awards jury should have passed the man over to give Scorcese the pity award like they did. Bullshit.
Children of Men. Characters you care about and direction that sticks you with a taser and drags you into a dystopian war zone. Unloved by Hollywood, unfairly scorned at the box office and well deserving of your DVD dollars… provided you’re not the type to get so hung up over heavy handed political statements that you’ll take offense and throw a fit like a three year-old. See it!
