I Don't Know

trembling and shaking
I see myself and wonder
at what is happening to have put me here
how can i get out? do i want to?
frustrated beyond anything, mad with feelings of hopelesness
is there really anything to be mad over?
i don't know, i just am...
rolling through the days not seeing
the rewards anymore
wanting less or more, i don't know
i couldn't tell you...
being snippy, bitchy, an asshole in general...
i just can't shake this sense
something is wrong
but if i don't know what it is
how can i fix it?
im trembling and shaking
angry for nothing...looking at myself
and wondering if i'm dead yet...?!?
9-15-99

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