The Television Transcript Project : commercials
Agency: Young & Rubicam, NY
Copy by: David DeNoon
First Telecast: August 1967
Taxpayer played by: Charles Nelson Reilly
Announcer (probably): Dick Cavett
Headache Tablets


Copy from: The Clio Awards Part I: A Tribute to 30 Years of Advertising Excellence 1960-1989, Clio Enterprises, Inc., pgs. 24-5. The product name and color are changed here.
Visual description by: Shazam (Suzanne).

[Interior. View from hall of small office with its door open. Facing us is the harried TAXPAYER. The TAX AUDITOR sits straighter, is more alert. Both men are balding. (On the office door: "Room 39" and "Mr. J. A. HARRIS.") Superimposed text on bottom of scene: "Commercial headache number 1040."]

ANNOUNCER
Commercial headache number 1040--the tax audit.

TAX AUDITOR
And so sir, since your deductions are higher than your income, we will have to strike out some of these.

TAXPAYER
Don't, don't go whizzing like that with that pencil.

[(By now, the text has left the screen.)]

TAX AUDITOR
Well, sir, now, for instance, the mink coat will have to come ...

TAXPAYER
Well, that's a, that's a legitimate business expense.

TAX AUDITOR
Oh?

TAXPAYER
I buy a, I buy a mink coat for my, my model. I'm, I'm in a dress line, and she's, she was cold.

TAX AUDITOR
Well, I'm sorry, sir. We can't allow that.

TAXPAYER
Just a moment.

TAX AUDITOR
This medical expense, what was that for?

TAXPAYER
That was just for a few bottles of Commercial.

TAX AUDITOR
Commercial?

TAXPAYER
I take Commercial when I have a, you know, I'm in a bind, or I'm on, I'm on, I'm on, I'm on the spot.

TAX AUDITOR
Is that what's in that purple bottle? That's Commercial?

TAXPAYER
That's right. That's Commercial.

TAX AUDITOR
You have a headache?

TAXPAYER
I have a Commercial headache, Mister ...

TAX AUDITOR
Right this minute, huh?

[As they continue talking, close-up of the product (small bottle) on the desk with the papers scattered nearby behind it.]

TAXPAYER
Right this minute here ...

TAX AUDITOR
I see.

TAXPAYER
... in this civil office. And put that in your little blue form.

ANNOUNCER
Life is full of Commercial headaches. But Commercial relief comes only from these tablets. Each 50 percent stronger than an aspirin for relief of headache pain. For Commercial headaches, get Commercial relief.

[Shot has gone to black screen with text superimposed: "For Commercial headaches get Commercial relief."]

TAXPAYER
I'm a giver. That's, is that so wrong?

TAX AUDITOR
Well, then, you won't mind giving the government $4,500.

TAXPAYER
Oh! Merry Christmas.

[time 01:00]

A related headache tablet commercial.
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Last Updated: 30 June, 1997

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