22 November 2000
salamz
pekabar? im bored today, so i decided to update my homepage which is a never ending story. Kalau orang lain punya homepage maybe dah ready kot? its been a month now... i think it's a month since i decided to revamp my homepage heh! waktu memula buat homepage tuh mmglah fun! within 2 weeks dah siap with kind help from my cybersis LilacBlue, dia buatkan graphics and i learn all that from her. That's how i know to do homepage. lilac taught me the beginners lesson :) thanx kak lil!
Then i decide to change again, so revamp the whole thing to a poetry site, all my poems and poems from ppl like kahlilgibran or baha zain and co ada kat situ, i like their works, regardless they are known or unknown. poetry to me reflects your innerself, though at times not really but then most of the time they do. cause when i wrote my poems, its base on what i see, hear and thought of. but it depends on individual heh! then aku revamp lagi homepage when i was in perth, berlambak lambak gambar aku letak plus tribute to frenz, coz at that time, living in the city of retirees, frenz on the net are the closest comfort to home! and i did that in 3 days without going out from my apt, sureya came over and brought lunch at one time coz she knows i was hiding at home without answering the phone all that ahahahah sue i do miss you too!
Bila aku balik sini, with a high turnover dramatic situation with family, rather than just balik cuti, aku kene stay sini permanently. FULLSTOP. so studies kene gantung, this is not cause aku buat hal kat perth kehapa, but sbb internally ahhh, so mak ngan nenek aku takmo aku balik ke perth facing all this nonsense on my own again. but have i told you my family is gypsies? heh! yes im cruel and sarcastic i know that, i call my own mum and granny gypsy, but indeed they are! dorang leh ramal macam macam. but kenapa dorang takleh ramal apa yang ada kat kepala aku? or maybe dorang sengaja takmo kasi tau, coz giving in means allowing me to go out of sg again hahaahaha. theres once, granny aku ramal aku takleh gi KL coz thats where masalah aku terletak haha! ada ke? b4 this kata perth now KL, but aku rasa masalah sebenarnya kat sg nie bukan kat mana mana heheeheheh alasan alasan alasan.... normallah kan?
So finally pick up the broken pieces in my life (aku lepak puas puas for abt 7 mths), bukan lepak ngan sesuka hati, but lepak terpaksa, the internal prob surfaces again bebiler masa dia suka. But aku kuatkan semangat, if i dont fight it, dia akan menang, dan aku tak suka percaya ngan benda nie seme, so aku percaya aku leh lakukan apa yang aku inginkan. so i did. got myself a job, lelong buku! biarpun tak sama ngan apa yang aku belajar sebelum nie, but aku puas. and opps sebelum korang fk aku nie takde pengalaman bekerja, b4 aku gi studies tuh, aku dah keje for 4 yrs, 3 yrs with 7-e and 1 yr with a travel agent. kat perth aku study tourism if u wanna know. so diatas pengalaman bekerja tuh seme, aku dapatlah keje lelong buku nie dan jadi kuli batak dorang ahahaahah. yes if ur at Changi Airport and u see one gal pushing trolley with loads of books, thats me! yes im small built and the trolley is heavier than me hahaaha. (and yes im black as well!) but i love my job, so tolak trolley pun tolaklahhhhhh, at least now ada gak orang appreciate keje aku, and i know my boss knows what im doing though ada orang yang tak happy ngan aku! be happy mate with whateva u do! dengki dengki nie seme pun apa yang kita dapatkan?
Right now, maybe bleh kata my life a bit stable, just abit, cause masih banyak lagi nak kene settle. To offload beban kat otak nie seme, aku beli pc, to reconnect back to the net world. for some reasons aku lebih suka internet, coz in real life orang rasa pelik ngan diri aku nie yang bagi dorang kejam, brutal + tomboy + takde perasaan. heh! image aku menggerunkan orang kot? but heck as well! aku tulis sajak pun dorang gelakkan but aku punya sukalahkannnnn. so, bila aku jenguk balik hp lama aku time kat perth punya, aku rindu sangat ngan life kat sana. i spent a yr there but feels like foreva, banyak kenangan kat sana. dan aku tak boleh nafikan juga, someone special did stay there b4 but dia dah *toot* hahaha. coz dia kata aku poison family dia, but i wish i had poison him instead. yes im still bitter bout the break up. sorry bout that but my life still goes on. he's just another fragment of my past life for now. but if u read this my ol' friend, kalau dah kata aku poison family kau why bother to even be frenz with me again? i dont need ur sympathy heh!
opps melencong lak, ah hp lama tuh, disbbkan aku takde kat perth lagi, and ppl keeps thinking im there, links pun ada dah tak gerak, so i set myself to do a new homepage sbb aku jeles ngan ANAS dan MATJAN punya homepage hehehe. Hp dorang gerek, go and drop by when ur free, kalah hp aku ngan dorang punya! so ANAS motivate aku soh buat hp nie, but i took my own sweet time, coz everything seems un-important for now. aku bukan buat hp untuk lelong gambar orang, so thats why no more pics of ppl or anyone else, xcept for my baby pic. yes thats the proof im black, if ur unhappy bout that, stay away.
This time aku nak homepage nie untuk jadi rumah aku, rumah aku in cyber hehehehe. that why i call it my e-portal. Biar ah takde orang nak baca homepage aku nie takpe, aku leh baca sendiri. sendiri buat, sendiri tengok, sendiri godeh, at least it gave me a bit of satisfaction! ada tempat aku letak poems aku, ada tempat aku letak poems members aku, ada tempat apa apa lagi checklah sendiri. i dont know whats gonna be up anymore :). just keep on tuning in and thanx if u read this letter up till here. ur a great person heh!