Why is this man smiling?

photo © Jeremy Davey

He's smiling because he achieved  the   most remarkable milestone ever in the annals of automobiles and motorsport. He is, if you don't  recognize the face, Richard Noble. He, his driver Andy Greene, and a team of British engineers, designers, and support personnel, broke the sound barrier with a wheeled vehicle in October of 1997. Let that sink in for a bit.

A former World Land Speed Record holder himself, Noble accomplished what, almost 50 years ago to the day, Gen. Chuck Yeager did for the first time in an aircraft. While watching John Force run 323-plus mph in a quarter-mile was (and still is) awe-inspiring, the mind simply cannot comprehend the thought of traveling far more than twice as fast in something still in tenuous contact with the ground. Not that they need it, but to Noble and Greene, Unc's sincerest congratulations.

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editorial content only© 1998 UFIE
f_eubel@juno.com

The Chewed-On-By- Toothless-Eskimo-Women Theory of Racing

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When you race in a Class where the competition is extremely close, at some point, you will hear a version of the following from your engine builder/machine shop of choice:

"You know, all these motors are pretty close in power. But I can send your piston rings/bearings/valves (fill in the part of your choice) out to be chewed on by toothless Eskimo women. Supposed to be worth one or two horsepower. With next day air both ways, it'll cost about $400 bucks."

At which point you dutifully whip out your checkbook like a good little duckie so that three days later you can look at stuff that a.) looks exactly like it did three days earlier, but b.) you have been assured will be much better, and, oh, yes, c.) cost $400 more than when you started. At your next race you finish third, happy in the knowledge that you really would have ****** had it not been for those rings/bearings/valves/whatever.

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If both of the preceding theories made perfect sense to you, be it with real cars or with "toy" cars, then you’ve been down the road before (I’ve got frequent-flier miles from the number of times I’ve been down it). If they didn’t, the rest of us can’t really explain it to you; you and your wallet/checkbook will have to make the journey alone.

I’d like to believe that some of the things I and the people I know have collected along the way may amuse or inform. Otherwise, why bother?

There will probably be some new rants and tirades every so often. If you feel like it, stop back and visit. Might be interesting. Then again…

re<g>ards,
Unca Frank

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