UsagiSakura Rants 2004

1/7/05
A new year with not much difference, huh? ^_^

12/16/04
I cannot believe I'm done with this semester!! I can finally rest for now... sigh... very nice really..
Won't spend much time here, so will look at this later on during the intersession break.

11/8/04
Ok, what's new today. I woke up today with like 15 minutes to get ready for and go to work. Sigh... I get sick of walking that long stretch of walkway from my dorm to main campus every freaking day. Then at work, I had to like get at least 12 of the interlibrary loans book. At least that was sorta fun, sorta like treasure hunting cause sometimes the periodicals are downstairs and sometimes its in the oversized section, that I have no idea where it was, but found it on my own anyway.
Working in the morning is significantly different than at night. I get more hw done at night... but its just so much more boring... while in the morning, there's usually more people coming up to the desk, so I have less time to do work, but at least I'm not super idle, which I do not know how to remedy at all.
Then ate at Wang's Center's Jasmine Court for the first time. Turns out that Campus Dining transferred 100 of my campus points to Flex Credits... so I can enjoy approximately 10 meals at Jasmine because those stuff is so damn expensive... I got fried veggie dumplings for like $4.99... damn. I could have gotten two slice of pepperoni pizza at the SAC instead. But I wanted to try out the system they started there, damn curiousity... The setup is nice.. but the way you order stuff is sorta confusing cause they go like the Chinese places in Chinatown where you get one big helping of rice or noddles and then two sides, which are different prices depending if you want veggie or non-veggie dishes. Sigh... and at least the soda cups are not branded with the Coca-Cola embalm... which confused me immensely cause I couldn't tell if the cups were small, medium or large then... heheh.
Also, the cash register is touch screen computerized... That's cool in thought, but do they really need something that high tech just to pay? I mean if you were ordering something, that would be different... oh well...
So a new week and new anticipations of work load. I spent yesterday trying to read my textbooks but to no avail... too stuck on the computer and whether to continue to dl stuff or check stupid email on stupid group who's like very indecisive...
Anyway, shouldn't be this idle, I got hw to do and people to persaude. Till next time, then...

10/21/04
Here again, a week later...
Just wanted to comment that I am so going to do bad this term.
Yet, this is not just circumstancial. Oh well.

10/14/04
Man, o man, I haven't written anything here in over a month. That just shows how little time I have for anime... funny thing is that I still watch dramas no matter what... and now that I finally got access to DC++ hubs this term, I can dl a lot more crap to keep my mind off of school work.
So disliking the courses I'm taking for my major, especially the lab one... and it's not that its a bad course, instead, it's because I tend to think it's a lot of work cause I have no idea how to implement our so called "design project". And I get the bad feeling that my whole group isn't really productive. sure, we meet and talk... and then sit at search engines and try to find stuff... but then one of us begs off and then we're just less reluctant to continue working after that. This seems really laughable... except I don't think we are the slightly prepared. sigh...
Midterms next week. Get to look at the ups and downs of not reading the textbooks at all. Might benefit and might not... hard to say...
A forth coming weekend of cramming, i guess.

9/1/04
Back at school now. Have a lot of free time to think about the heat and the enormous student body around here. Sigh... I don't really get how I'm going to survive here this semester. I don't feel like I'm going to enjoy the college experience.
Moving in wasn't too bad since both my folks helped out. The problem was that I was solely the one responsible for packing and so have forgot to get a lot of stuff.

6/12/04
It's weird. I've just looked at some pics of old high school friends and I can clearly see that their "look" has matured a lot. Sigh... the things that happen when one gets old is that everyone else arounds you does that also. Just like the next door neighbor kid, she can actually whole sentences now... where does the time go?
A lotta new cousins will be coming around by the end of the year. It's so weird to see my first cousins as mother and fathers... cause they were suppose to be the kids too. But slowly they are converting to the hassle of raising the next generation. Don't get me wrong, the job has gotta be fulfilling, but heck, it's gotta be a journey too.
Tried to see Lord of the Rings 3 today. Tried because it was a failed attempt. Fell asleep before an hour was in. Sigh...
Summer vacation has this pointlessness to days that makes the week go by so much faster. No bad and not good.
Watched several different animes since I've gotten back, but not necessarily the whole series. Got very little patience for that, for sure. Might just update the site again ^_^.

5/14/04
It's summer vacation again!! That means lots and lots of time to watch anime and maybe write up something innovative for this site. No promises, since they never work out anyway...
Finished all my finals... yesss.... and now I'm molting in the dorm until my folks are willing to retrieve me from this place. They gotta make time to move all the stuff I've accumulated over the whole school year. That's cause I'm a pack rat... I take a lotta stuff (never steal, though ^_^) and even though I have no use for it, I keep it until ten years from now when I finally see it again, I decide its totally useless and then deem it throwable.
Other than that, I dug through a garbage heap to get some cardboard boxes. That don't sound too nice, huh? Well, it wasn't too bad since nearly all the trash was just folded down cardboards.
I feel sooo sorry for my bro... he gonna have to lug all my stuff up those stairs... ^_^ Serves him right for not being around to help me move into the dorms this year. This way, he'll get twice the muscle workout with one moving.
Spent the whole day tossing out tons of paper I printed out from sinc site... no wonder they raising the tech fee... gotta pay for those trees somehow...
My room looks bare-ish and by tomorrow, everything needs to be put away cause my folks dont deign to help me pack when they come... lazy bums that they are... heheh
I feel so damn relieved that this semester is over. The whole school thing was wearing thin on my patience... and I didn't enjoy one minute of test taking... which I usually find some stupid humor in... no surprise at all, but even given the three reading days that Stony thought to fit in, I still didn't study... MEC 363... I will hate you for life. Otherwise than that tragedy... already got an A added onto my gpa from my dec. ^_^
RAH, RAH... gonna leave Irving for good. No more stopping at the union before going back to dorm. Sigh... gonna miss being here for the past two years... but time to move on to greener pasture... still, regrets are regrets from this place did treat me pretty swell even given its minor problems.
Notice how much I'm typing? In such a swell mood right now... even though my eyes are blurring cause I need sleep...
Well, this just might be the last entry from my Irving dorm room. In this place where there's a big stain on the carpet. Desk edge that can't stick to the frame and peeling paint in closets, very unsupportive bed frame and so on. sigh... let me leave it at that.
No plans over the summer. Hence time to watch anime. But that means my mom gonna be sooo pissed at her two bum kids... heheh... at least this yr I got a companion in bumville. No good place to be, mind u, so let's hope we find something constructive to do... like rid the apartment of cockaroaches and mice once and for all...

5/11/04
Actually succeeded in studying for a few hours today. ^_^

5/8/04
Classes were totally over with yesterday... and I was fortunately enough not to have to stress to much over my ONE class. ^_^ But, I had a misappointment and ended up doing the extra credit and managed to hand it in on time. Now, this extra credit means sorta a lot to my gpa. Although technically, each hw is only 2% of the grade... still... I wanna know I tried very hard to get a grade and not accept it as my defeat... please don't let that modern physics thing happen again... I dont want a C to pull down my average.

5/2/04
A new month that means also the last month in which school is in session. My lil bro is gonna be home by the end of next week, and I got a laborer for moving day! Can't imagine moving all my crap back and forth from the parking lot and dorm room and then up those many flight of stairs back home.
But, before I can figure out what to toss out and keep, I have to do hw, and finals. Study and have the blast of my life facing all my illegible notes in order to past that final test.
I have a very crappy handwriting that I'm beginning to annoy myself with. I cannot make out any of my math notes and so on. The paper I write on aint very good quality either, so that most of my notes are see through from the both sides. sigh... deciphering and so on... what fun being a temp archeologist is...
Missed the Roth Regeatta, and couldn't see people drown and boats fall apart. That was suppose to be the highlight of my week too. I did stop by to see all the nice looking and not so nice looking boats. Hardly ever seen so many people on that side of campus and heheh... the food was setup pretty cool... the hotdogs were weird looking, but the hamburger was authentic... especially the ice cream too.
So weekend was way inactive... gotta really complete hws that I have been laying to the side...

4/22/04
Is it the fact that all my classes are pretty boring, that I didn't do well on my makeup exam, or that I think my eyes are seriously getting tired, that I feel like today is gonna be the pits? Once my next class is over... I'm gonna be treating myself to some more internet binging and then maybe, just maybe, I can start doing my work.
I feel literally pretty tired. It just happened after I ate some doughnuts too... makes me wonder what drug they place in those Krispy Kremes... cause I was pretty awake two hours ago.
I've neglected some hw assignments this week... which means I gotta catch up with the readings when weekend comes. Which means, I will NOT do it again, which means, I will have a heavier work load next week.
Figured and inputed my schedule for the following term. I hate the 17 credit limit during this registration period. It stops me from registering for one more class and I'll probably not even get into it either because of this. Aww.. jeez. Why make my life harder than needs be, huh?
Anyway, gonna take three of my major's desginated classes... including a lab. sigh. I'm debating whether to undertake a dec class so that I won't be bombarded with so much technical facts. But then, my stupid major is enforcing that we take a specific dec F class even though I already have one down. Damn, wasted time and knowledge too.

4/16/04
So what do you know, today the weather is ideal for spring... not like the rainy, gloomy stuff we've been getting at the beginning of the week. Sigh... sorta makes me wish I didn't have to think about schoolwork.
Spring break passed by at such a quick pace. I was somewhat of a bum at home again. It's nice to be under no obligations other than to wash dishes... Yet now, in this damn small dorm room, all I can look at is my desk with the piling work. Sigh... I sound so redundant to myself.

4/2/04
April's Fool Day passed without any incident. Not that there usually is anything note worthy about it anyway... So this happens to be the 1st year anniversary that Leslie Cheung commited suicide. Like what my mom says, though, how much sympathies can u feel for someone who took their own life? Hmm... It's a sad scenario, but when you compare it to how bravely Anita Mui stood in front of the mass media's lime light during her illness, you gotta have more admiration for her than for Leslie.
Not to get off the topic of HK pop idols. Finished the series, "To Love with No Regrets" and the ending was stupid... It had that happy ending kinda feel, which I'm not against, but they had two "main" characters have no real resolved feelings. Oh, whatever... at least it wasn't totally obnoxious in trying to tie all the notes together and pair up all the young people... ^_^
On the tape agenda at home, I'm gonna watch old Chinese movies, such as Fantasia 2004 and maybe Lost in Time. I sorta want to watch PTU now that it won so much awards at the HK Golden Horse... not that I have a clue what's it about.
Not to sound repetitive but, I have this overwhelming relief that Spring break is here, (technically it still really being 4/1/04 anyway...) and I can get away from campus and see the actual world outside of stony brook. I can hardly ever travel around Long Island since I detest taking those Long Island buses given their sporadic schedules.... I rather take NYC buses anyday... there's less chance of getting stuck waiting for over an hour for just one bus...
I'm tired... I was going to start to do my hw... but its all in vain... I opened that internet explorer just to check my course websites and bam, I'm ranting away again... heheh... I make myself laugh at how easily detracted I can get from anything of import... Gonna end this entry and start figuring out what to bring home ^_^.

3/29/04
I find I'm really getting antsy with my midterms tomorrow... I wasn't so panicky beforehand... and now looking at the notes, I don't think this test can be that bad... but you never know... anyway... i wish myself some luck tomorrow morn...

3/27/04
Sooo... I so don't want to do work... no motivation whatsoever to study for my two exams that both are happening on tuesday. One of these exams being MEC363... or that stupid course that I'm not doing too well in. Not at the failing level yet since my whole class doesn't seem to be doing too swell either... but at least this means i might get a boost from the curve if I absolutely ace this midterm.
Boring, boring... I'm at work... not much to do, which is great... but unfortunately, this means I dont' wanna look at my notes or text either..
Let me do some typing exercise that will help me pass the time and also make my typing skills improve somewhat more naturally.
When loads are applied to a beam, its longitudinal axis is deformed into a curve. The resulting strains an stresses in the beam are directly related to the curature of the deflection curve. For purposes of analysis, we identify two points m1 and m2 on the deflection curve.
That's pretty it.

3/22/04
Well, remember how I said in the last entry that I would write more in the next entry on my baltimore trip? Well, scratch that, it's been way too long and the details are scathered pretty thinly in my memory.
Geezz, i think my life is too damn uneventful with hardly anything worth updating on. I'm start doing hw really late so that I can't get enough sleep. One good thing is that my morning class tomorrow was canceled so I can sleep at least an hour more! YEA! ^_^
The second round of midterms are around the corner and heheh... me not trying all that much to do anything and sit down and study/cram.
Frankly spring break would have worked wonders this week... what with it being spring finally... which makes it unbelievable with this damn chilly weather today...
Me bored... me dead bored... I dont wanna look at the textbook examples to understand how to do my bending moment problems... school is really just a hassle..
The room selection page on the Stony Brook site is up and I was comparing points to see how much I get outta a total of 7. Me really proud of myself la... ^_^ This may just land me in the UGAs and I can probably hike my way to campus even more with this turn of events.
I lost touch with all, ALL of my old hs buddies... i just dont bother trying... and well... it's somewhat hard when we choose to communicate over aim and not really by phone... oh well. Just goes to show you that there ain't nothing for granted in this world. You get whatever u worked to keep and also maintained with upmost perfection.
Today worked for Girl Power with a pretty rowdy bunch of kids. These girls were not very cooperative and I really don't think I have the power to direct their attention cause well... they really don't bother listening to me a lot.. I feel really stupid repeating myself so many times... but they are a bunch of good kids... I think cause I don't make the class really nice and fun... I don't have that innovative thinking to engage 6-7 years old to the excitement of MS Word. HAH... the excitement! That's a good one...
I feel really sorry to the kids cause this program is too sporadic that they can't really learn much about anything to begin with.
Am I a leader? Nope. I don't have assertiveness. I have opinions, of course, but nothing I do not possess the assertiveness that will let me pursue something new in life. I think the only way I can better myself is through some leadership experiences...
That's all for tonite!

3/10/04
Right now listening to Edison Chan's song "Take it, Get it" something with polarids. It's pretty catchy la...
I don't understand why I'm in this mood. When I start updating pages, I update all three websites that I rant in. I think it's a sickness that I cannot seriously control without making myself go nuts.
Just wanted to update on my Baltimore trip. ^_^ I wanted someplace where I can be more comfortable writing all the little details of stuff that happened... down to the impossible minute.

Friday:
Got to the Hendrix parking lot at 7:45 am sharp and ehhehe, except for two people that came a little less than one minute than me, everyone else is what i called late.
Side track. Back in my dorm, while I was making sure I got everything, i stole a glance at that roommate across the way and she was sleeping away peacefully. Granted she was suppose to have an exam that day, but still, we aren't really on speaking terms. I guess cause she too busy to socialize with me anymore, and tsk tsk, Im not too eager to start a conversation with ms. busy anytime too soon. I have bad premonitions of how this sorta "roommateship" is gonna end up... and it's really sad that the only person I made friends with not through schoolwork is now no longer really exsistent in this dorm. It really is similar to a single room now.
So we waited for one of the late drivers to get us to the supervisor's house for breakfast. Then as I admired the house and the sweet guitar it sported... the grownups went to get the minivans to drive us to the Baltimore. I watched some tv and looked around. The house is very tainty with a very cozy feel. I wasn't really exceptional friends with any of the other girls. and I only knew the name and major. But they were all nice people, so I just listened in on their conversations and stayed the silent wierd girl, that I am.
The vans came, bathroom breaks, and then we drove out. I was in the car with three other students. And as the music blared on the cd player I napped.
For what I was awake to know, we stopped twice for bathroom and gas, and also lunch. I felt like a pig for buying so much food while all the other girls seemed to eat such smaller portions.
Then as we got bored, we played cards and started off the infamous taboo game. I suck at giving clues, but hey, I think I can guess pretty well. Then as it was getting to be my turn to give out clues, the highway gave way to downtown baltimore. We had a hell of a time finding the parking lot entrance to the hotel. And when we went in to register, I found that I was suppose to share a room with a total of four people, two of which had declined to come, including that roommate of mine. So as we moved into the hotel room on the second floor, my door key failed to work, so using my new roommate's one I moved my wheeled case in and went back downstairs to fix it. The elevators are damn fast too... Then later on, since two of the girls were being pur up with two other strangers from a different school, we sorta decided to squish them in with us, so that we had more company... heheh, it was gonna be hard to share one bathroom with four people.
All of us basically just threw down the suitcases and then hit downtown. The harbor place, similar to South Street Seaport, was only four and a half blocks away, so we went there, snapping pics, since nearly everyone had a digi cam... i'm really glad I got mine... all for showing off too... i hung with two other girls as we helped each other take shots of ourselves.

MORE TO COME, need to start homework soon...

I praise myself on being anayltical so by the end of the trip, I was able to get a clearer idea of what each girl's personality is.

2/28/04
Starting this weekend, I will not like weekends as much. I have too much readings to do and too little motivation to go ahead with it. I have a paper/presentation next week, with two midterms and countless homework assignments. Needless to say, my life aint that fun... especially since i procrastinated till the very, very last minute.
Yesterday was a field trip to an Aviation Museum. Took a lot of photos and some came out blurry due to my unsteady hand and a lot of very little light. I think since I was too busy clicking pictures, that I neglected to really listen or read the exhibits. There were models of how airplanes and aircrafts were built in minute scale. Now that is cool. Almost like a doll house, except without all the cuteness. Need I mention that there were really airplanes there? They were big and they were all parked there as if it was a garage and we were all admiring just an average car show. There was also an imax movie and a simulation ride. The ride was a bit lame... I think cause it was too sci-fi. The one I went to in Great Adventures was about chasing dinos and was more exciting. The imax movie was a sorta dull... the story plot, i mean. They could have taken advantage of the big screen shots...but they ended up with people shots. I did like how the pictures of birds in flight took up the whole screen. That was scary in the sense of "the attack of the birds". In the souvenir shop, I was tempted to buy glow in the dark stars.... ehehh... but me too cheap to buy a $5 pack of like 20 stars. Once it gets old, then its no fun. Especially since I can't really glue any of the stars on my dorm wall and risk peeling the paint off at the end of the semester.
Btw, right now i'm sorta really bored. Not much to do on a Saturaday and I despise sticking my nose in those readings again. Makes my eyes twitch with all those words on the page. It isn't interesting either, so I keep on yawning in an attempt to supplu O2 to my brain again. heheh... its not fair at all.

2/27/04
Finally decided to change the background to my anime reviews. It's a lighter color so that my font color can stick to black and not rely on white... anyway, that's all I did to this site. sigh...
Is life the pits? Maybe. I feel like there's a lotta potential out there. Just not very up to seeing it all at once.
School is school, with turns of work cause I start last minute and lots of random readings cause I start that last minute too. sigh...
Anyway, I have a bunch of anime to see... yet haven't really digged in... Azumanga Daioh? OMG. so idiotic and cute... especially that pull off ponytail?? heheh...

2/13/04
Okay, I updated. Not that anyone is seriously keeping track... but hey, at least I'm safe for another half a year for not updating ^_^. Good God, Friday the 13th...

2/12/04
I knew it. If I update less often, I'll have something to actually update with. I mean in the rants section, though... So what's new in my life?
well, I have a lotta hw that i am purposely avoiding because I need to read the textbooks in order to understand what the heck the prof was lecturing on.
But, most importantly, I got a job!! Measly pay, apparently... but since its at the library, how hard can the the work load be? I mean... i'm hpping its pretty low... but depending on what patrons want... then there isn't anything wrong with that. I got a night and weekend shifts, though... bleh... it'll mean very lil people around there anyway...
life is dull. not striving to change it either. hmmm.. gonna go back to hw. Really need to change my time management and priorities...

2/6/04
Well, today is Thursday. Nothing happened out of the ordinary. It seems it that there are a lot more things going on around me than actually to me. I feel very sleepy, yet I am staying awake doing nothing but typing. There seems to be something to look at there. If you can't look at that than there aint much left in life to hide from.
Peeves today:
Sold my bus 110 book at what I think was a rip off price. It was only a few dollars within half price of what I would have gotten from the bookstore... which aint too fair... but whatever, I get cash to compensate for that course...
Another one... felt really really inattentive in class today... even almost dozed off once again... not a good track that I'm going on... i think cause I didn't get a chance to eat anything in the morning... something, I swear I would try to fix tomorrow.
Gotta complete about 4 hws this weekend... meaning I better start tomorrow as well... sheesh.. I could be going home tomorrow too... if I didn't feel like I had to meet up on Friday... sigh... not that im looking forward to traveling on the LIRR again... sigh...
Stuff can go wrong everywhere u look. sigh... arguments, arguments... what the heck can go wrong with a little bickering? its almost much more healthier to do so than to keep stuff bottled up inside anyway... sigh... but sooo quiet now...
Well, no activity here. No surprise, huh? Im really unmotivated to update since no one visits this measly thing of the past... oh whatever... i should be less obessessed with updating this particular page and just update others... but this will of course always be the site where all the fresh info comes from...

1/22/04
Happy Chinese New Year! money $$$!

1/10/04
Happy New Year! '04 is here!
Sorryyyyy! I totally neglected this site since my return to nyc. That's cause there's no more compute at home and I gotta rely on my bro's laptop in order to get online. And now with him leaving soon, ....*sniff, sniff... I gotta say bye-bye to all the glories of computer fun. sigh... no internet means I gotta rely on other ways to entertain my sorry ass. Sigh... guess that has to be tv again.
So, what's new in my life? eheheheh... I finished whatever naruto episodes my bro had and also the pretty cool series Cowboy Bebop. So guess what? Finally updates and new reviews! heheh... but then I'll have to actually sit down and type out a few paragraphs so, I'll definitely update by the time Feburary comes along. On my honor!
I swear that I should really keep a journal... okay, not necessarily online, even though not many people read this anyway, but even handwritten, cause I feel I have too many memories that i'm forgetting or just candid feelings that I feel too embarassed to type about and then end up forgetting to go that, like permanently... Not sure if I should convert one of my existing sites or all together register another free one cause... heheh.. I'm not ever gonna finish any of these sites at all... I'll just update when the mood hits me... which is usually linked to the fact that someone mentions a specific site in the guestbook...
sigh... not much surfers nowadays bother with this site... it's sad but true... I get depressed about this every now and then... you know, the reason I don't write much personal stuff on xanga is that well... don't know how to express myself to people when i know there's an audience... abiet small one.
So what's been happening in my life? If you're that interested, nothing. Been getting up late, around 1-2pm and then quickly wallowing the few hours away till my mom gets back. Then it's more wallowing with either anime or chinese movies until dinner time... then if I'm lucky and there aren't any dishes, heh, I'll watch some more stuff on the telly. Afterwards the folks sleep, and then the bro and here I am, at 3:23 am in the morn typing away like mad.
I feel like typing more... and since I won't have the computer tomorrow... I'll guess I'll write some stuff up so I can get it out of the way.
Tomorrow gonna go to restuarant to celebrate my niece's getting to be a month old. Ahhh... when someone close to twenties looks at something that is just so newly introduced into life, I feel only cuteness. Yup, that's it. Nothing really out of the ordinary, just think those little bundle of joys are cute... heheh. This niece is named Avina, and the older one is named Vienna. Very, very unique names, if you ask me.
Gonna miss the lil bro... even though we didn't actually do anything specially different. Sigh, but lo and behold as is to be expected, our spring breaks will clash and chances are unless I come home for the weekend, I won't get to see him... not that i'm dying to see him, mind you... just more fun to have a playmate than none... especially one who knows how to cook... eheheh...
School gonna start in two weeks... Am I anticipating it? heh... beside schoolwork, I'm not very knowledgeable anywhere else... especially with friends... I have acquaintances, but see, I don't bother to contact them often enough so that they switch to becoming friends.. which leaves me grouchy and end up with very few people I remember names by.
Gonna start writing essays for scholarships... tsk, tsk, they all ask bout what my profession goals are... like I have any at this stage of my education. I'm pretty low ambitious...
Well, that's it! See ya probably when I get back to my dorm and have perpetual long and pretty speedy internet!

For old rants from 2003, go to here.