Jezzi’s Song: Dresses are a Guy’s Best Friend (apologies to Marilyn monroe) (©1997 TRP)
People sometimes look at us and feel fear and loathing But we think we’re the lucky guys to dress in women’s clothing
When you finally tire of dull drab male attire, Then dresses are a guys best friend. If sensuous satin is the fabric you desire, To give you that look You won’t find in that GQ book. Get in shape; we can all relate To the curves on which we now depend; So slip on that frock now, My gosh, you look hot- WOW! Dresses are a guy’s best friend!
Pink chiffon! Dotted Swiss! RuPaul, Dennis Rodman! Speak to me Jerry Springer; tell me all about it!
If you look in the mirror and the face there is boring Makeup is a guy’s best friend Some paint and some powder and your features you’re reforming You can’t look away >From the gorgeous self who’s here to stay! Grab a brush; stroke on some blush Imperfections are starting to mend; So put on your lipstick, Get into this girl schtick; Makeup is a guy’s best friend!
(march interlude)
When the mayor of New York can dress up like a drag queen Then dresses are a guy’s best friend. When the NBA’s bad boy gets into the bride scene We all with a roar Can open wide that closet door. Use that “Nair” then perm your hair You’ll look glamourous from end to end. So slip on that evening gown; Go out now and PAINT THE TOWN...
Dresses...
Dresses...
I don’t mean pantsuits
‘Cause Dresses ... are a guy’s best friend!
(spoken) Put on a dress, honey; you’ll feel good!