GIVE GIFTS THAT GROW WITH THE YEARS

Giving presents is one of the pleasures of life - especially a gift to a child. But sometimes we have a hard time deciding what to give a child who already has so much. It seems like poor stewardship to buy the fad of the moment at exorbitant prices, particularly when gifts don't last too long in this age of brittle plastic.

There are some gifts that not only endure - they grow more valued as a child grows up:

Give the magic of touch. A hug, a pat on the back, a consoling grip on a shoulder are mirrors of the way Jesus showed His love. So often we read in the Bible, "And He touched them."

Let your children feel cherished - unconditionally. Show, by oral or body language, that even when you are exasperated, you cherish them. As the Bible commands - not recommends - "Parents, love your children."

Listen before disciplining. A parent who lets the child explain misdeeds, reviews the rules of the situation, and administers fair discipline is remembered dearly. Proverbs admonish us, "Be slow to anger."

Be united when it comes to discipline. Make it obvious that you and your spouse are of one mind in guidance and discipline. Allowing children to play one parent against the other is damaging to adult and child alike. This unity is especially vital with divorced parents. Already under deep stress because of the separation, the child is further tortured when he or she "has to wear two yokes" - rules that differ markedly with Mom and Dad.

Give your children time to do their thing. This is more than just spending time with a child; spend it at his or her level of interest. Don't demand victory in a softball game; enjoy just being there - as your child does.

Give your children a home where they enjoy being - and where their friends love to visit. Playing host to a procession of children can be daunting, especially to working parents. But the haven that sheltered both your child and their friends is a memory cherished for a lifetime. Keeping a reservoir of snacks and lemonade is one of the most rewarding expenses a parent can assume.

Give your child the distance to learn from their mistakes. "Protecting" your child from the consequences of any mistake deprives him or her from growing into a responsible adult.

Give your child the example of a positive attitude. How you look at life will have great impact on how your child approaches the challenges of life.

Share with your children the love of church. Besides the obvious spiritual benefits of Christian corporate worship, church affiliation is a solid rock in our secular life, especially with families moving so often.

Give moral and ethical guidance. Nothing in human life comes near to the influence of parents in shaping a child's character. Let your child know your values in all areas of life. Help them form their own, based on God's wisdom.
© 1997 vinebranch@hotmail.com

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