HELP FOR MEN

How to be a spiritual leader in your home

Men are intended to take the spiritual lead in the home, but it often seems to fall more naturally on the mothers who do so much to raise the children. Many people have attributed their spiritual upbringing to a godly mother or grandmother. Although it is the pattern, it is not the ideal. Children need strong signals of spiritual leadership from their dads.

Tips for fathers:

Listen to what God says. Ephesians 6:4 says, "Fathers, do not exasperate your children, instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord."

Protect your family in the spiritual realm. Are you using biblical discernment in what movies, magazines, and other influences you are exposing yourself to? Are you taking responsibility for the music, video games, Internet sites, and other activities that your family is engaged in?

Pray. Pray with your wife for each of your children and their future mates. Pray out every problem, bringing every need to God.

Listen. From the time your children are young, give them your undivided attention on a regular basis so they feel you truly care.

Put your family first. Learn how to leave your work at the office. And don't let fatigue get the best of you. Remember that the time spent with your children will have a lasting impact on their character. It is difficult to change gears after a long day of working, but well worth the effort.

Love them unconditionally. Encourage your children to be who God wants them to be. Ask the Lord to show you the special needs of each child, then be creative in leading them to grow.

Live what you believe. This does not mean you have to be perfect; just be willing to walk according to God's Word, and ask forgiveness from your children or wife if you blow it by your words or actions. Then start over anew.

Seize the moment. Make the time, and tune in to those teachable moments with your children. Share your heart. Be sure to tell your children your testimony, and explain why you do what you do (go to church, not go certain places, etc.).

Pray together with your children about their problems, or particularly tough situations. And ask them to pray for your specific needs or requests as well.

Take time alone with each child to focus on them. Get to know the person inside the child on a one-to-one basis.

Beg, borrow, and steal any good ideas you can find from other fathers who seem to make this work.

From The Top Ten Ways to Drive Your Wife Crazy and How to Avoid Them! by Hans and Donna Finzel, copyright (c) 1996. Used by permission of Victor Books, an imprint of Chariot/Victor Publishing, a division of Cook Communications, Colorado Springs, Colo. To place orders call toll free: 1-800-437-4337.

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