Raab
"I'm Raab Himself, and I'm a complete fucking idiot"

"When I see that scene and see how drunk I was that day and realise I cant be that drunk every day, that pisses me off"
- Raab on a scene from Haggard

"You just wasted a whole glass of alcohol, what the hell are you goddamn thinking?"
- Raab to unknown

"So what if im goddamn drunk all the time, im not hurting anybody"

"Drinking....it is a drug but its worth it. and hey im alcoholic, yeah you might say that but pfffft, best thing ever!"

"I cant imagine why anyone would think that being an alcoholic is fucked up"

Raab in Haggard
"Come on Val I can be the get away driver"

Bam Margera on Raab
"Raabs a full blown acoholic, theres no doubt about it but the funny thing is, is that he accepts it. Like usually if you say ' yo you're an alcoholic' an alcoholic will be like 'No im not man I have a few beers every once and while but thats about it' but then you can go like ' yo Raab you're an alcholic' he'll just be like ' yeah so then bring me another beer' and its just like you cant argue with that"

"Chris Raab is the most obnoxious fuck that i've ever met and his whole mission in life was to annoy everybody he possibly could. He was the only reason why I went to school, as soon as he got kicked out for shitting on a locker, I quit."

"This is the only kid that i've ever met that would drink his own piss, piss in the back of the school bus, piss in health class like under the desk, playing with shit. It just seems like he's always involved in shit. There's always shit around Raab"

"In 9th grade Raab got a job as a pizza deliverly boy and I remember he would write down the address' of every house that didn't tip him and then he would get me and Bran to go out with him at night and knock down their mail boxes of just cause they didn't tip"

Brandon Dicamillo on Raab
"Theres no such thing as A beer for Chris Raab, the A turns into an S and goes onto the end of the word and continues"

Ryan Dunn on Raab
"Raab would be...He shit on lockers in highschool, so you gotta respect that forever, actually Raab?s one of my best friends, well they're all obviously my best friends. Raab is... Weed. I think you can figure out why I call him that. He likes to garden. Quite the green thumb that guy!"

Jess Margera on Raab
"One time Raab didn't wash his hair for two months, and he still got hot girls. Raabs Cadillac just caught fire the other day and his clothes in the backseat got burned up, but he just said 'fuck it' and rocked his burnt clothes to the bar. He smelled like a campfire! Raab fucking rules, end of story"

"He usually just buys a plain white t-shirt, writes GNAR KILL on it then puts duct tape over whatever stains he gets on his shirt. So after about a week or so he's probably spilled beer on his shirt about 10 times so he has 10 pieces of duct tape"