Vol. 2   Vol. 3

The following is a growing list of reasons to hate Matt. It expands more with every submission I get. So if you want to make it the biggest list in the world (we can do it!), then send in some reasons, champo.

Reasons 1-15 are submitted by Me, Volcomstalker. 1.His hair is always stupid 2.He uses big words 3.He spends too much time in Nambour 4.He annoys everyone at IGA 5.He thought Mr Magoo was funny 6.He has horrid skin. His face is 23% grease 7.He consistently scratches his balls and 'taint' area 8.He's very unnatractive 9.He talks bullshit, non-stop, all day 10.He eats too much curry 11.He smells really, really bad 12.He has poor personal hygiene 13.He eats the weirdest shit 14.He always makes obscure jokes that people have no chances of getting 15.He drinks tea 16.He sux @ badminton!! :p - JAz 17.He has Queer Friends - Mentos® 18.He Is The Lord - Todie onda X 19.He torments teachers - UnKnOWn 20.He has bucked teeth, wait.. that's me, Oh shit - Smitty 21.He's a greasy haired queer git - person 22.he has more nipple hair than me - bazz 23.He's just plain ugly. The sight of him makes me vomit - nobody 24.Just look at him, damn - Jiminy Cricket 25.Cos he doesn't do me hard enough. - Eddie Welsh 26.He looks hell werid when he's straight! - WHo caREs! 27.He has an ospicious eye for detail - seriious 28.hes a nest - geoff armstrong 29.hes fat - geoff armstrong 30.he gives bad head - geoff armstrong 31.Cause he stole schroter from me! Cause he wouldn't give me head - Milfy 32.I think matthew is a real intellectual he just needs to make that special effort - Rudd 33.One whiff of his shirt sends a hard man a-weeping. - seriious 34.His fat and walks like a women - Sconehead 35.He has these really weird hairy blotches on his arse (even ask Bill) - Steve 36.He is the biggest fattest mother fucker, and he is gay and has a small dick and is the dumbest fuck in all of nambour - waynual 37.He has the wit of an oaf and the charm of Mr. vadge's sock after a hard day fox-trotting. - Mrs Vadge 37.Matt collects his own stool - Mr Mushroom 38.All you are liars, no one can hate matt. I love him, I always had, even during my relationship with Mieka. - Eddie 39.there are sooooo many i dont know where to start; he speeds, his brother is an ass hole, i hate him! 40.He dissed my sperm. Yowah! - Farty McBrewster 41.hes a dickhead. - chrissy+lisa 42.Matt has a homosexually orientated mind, but he's a king still! - Morgs 43.No reason but who actually needs one, it's matt. To the fools who say Matt ain't bad, shame on you. Death by anal rape to you all. - Existenze 44.No reason - Morgs 45.The laugh of a sissy.. - 'less bright champoins' 46.He beat me in English. - Sammy Snail 47.Matt is a fucking cock head wanker tits cock face ball testicle wart that farts cum all day loong!!!! - Fuck off 48.his a devo - kimberley 49.becuase he likes mornay sauce and we all know what that looks like - kimberley 50.cuz he spits and dont swallow - Mr Mutha Fucka 51.I dont hate matt, he knows how to stroke my cock and balls, and he like to watch me stroke my cock and balls all day long. nothing but cock and balls - cock and balls 52.He once hid two little bald men in his bra and tricked me into sucking them like tits. - Shasta McNasty 53.He is a way better dabber than me. - Rudd 54.He eats way to much Stagg Chilli. - Ed Die 55.The only cereal he has in his house is coco pops. - Ed Die 56.He has cigars that he doesn't even smoke. - Ed Die 57.He went into the toilet with Brian and when they came out Brian washed his hands. - Ed Die 58.cos he wont give me head - Someone else 59.He's gay fart with a fat arse - i love matt club creator 60.hes ugly - number 52 61.he hangs out at the library - number 53 62.its christmas time - number 54 63.Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls,Cock and Balls, Cccccooooooccccckkkkkkk aaaaaannnnnnndddddd Bbbbbaaaaaallllllllllllllllllllllllllssssssssss - Cock and Balls 64.The dumb shit slept until 2:00pm and then refused to cook my lunch due to a lack of cream. Even after I'd assured Eddie Welsh that he was going to. What a horrible little cunt. Let's all hate him. - Burger Strongman 65.Cause he is my brother, but i really don't hate him, he is just smarter than i am and it shits me! - Veronica 66.he drives that shitty little datto which is all stained from copious amounts of animal love with penguins - gerald v 67.He has never once been on our show, Entertainment Tonight. - Bob Goen 68.Isn't it fucking obvious? - Mr. Fuck Features 69.cause i can - Veronica 70.he doesn't like to swallow when i spoof on his face, he prefers to put it in his curries and use it as a spicy sauce! - mr dick face 71.Umm....he is a bastard? - Pleasure Bird 72.Look, I don't know what you people have against this beautiful specimen. Look at him, that stupid hair, those bouncing bosoms, he beautiful! I mean, if he was a crocodile, I'd have him in a second. Tune in next week kids to see me, STEVE IRWIN, try to stick my thumb up Matt's arse. You don't want to miss it! Things take a turn for the worst when he actually enjoys it and I have to pry him off me using Terri! CRIKEY! - Steve Irwin 73.He tends to blabber shit about nothing for hours on end! - Matt Himself 74.Who the hell is matt..he must be a fuckface to have a website devoted to him sucking - Pat 75.I need only one reason to hate Matt. Fart! Phleeeeeeepock wibblecun ted farkyew purple. Frrrrrat!!!! Question? - Bark Sensible 76.he smells like cow crap - mitchell 77.cos he didn't put me on his site. and he said that i couldn't sing, and that i should hold shannon's breasts to be entertaining at the talent quest - sharn 78.Matt is less than correct when he calls me a plant! Grrrrr. - Terrance the Shrub 79.He has an inferior nipple - Perty Berty 80.My reasons are my own - God 81.I can't think of a better reason than the fact that so many other people seem to hate him. I am a sheep, pressured by my peers. - Sorry the Sandwich 82.Matt ate the hat that I left where the cat shat. Seuss! - Theodor Geisel III 83.He can only count up to 81 and then he starts going backwards, skipping the number 80 each time. - Pi Thagrius 84.He has trouble getting erections over female porn - 85.Matt fucked my favourite sow and left me with "sloppy seconds"! - Henrii Pigfucker 86.He spits all the time. A filthy habit. - Gulp N'Swallow 87.Why does Jesus let mothers murder their children in these monstorous clincs? And McDonalds is even worse! - Birth Severed 88.He's a dickhead. As if I needed a reason anyway? - Smugg Wankerr 89.His disregard for my patience is becoming quite frustrating. - Lord O' Fuck 90.You're a cunt - Cunt 91.Hii, my name is Sandra... I think this Matt guy sounds.. kinda... fun, i would loovveee to meet him, maybe even in the bedroom.... get back to me Matt... on 1800 Sandys Love Nest (www.hotsandy.com) ! - Sexy Sandra 92.Legend - Morgs 93.I have a migraine. - Mrs. Burkt 94.Because he loves Kincaid, not me - Chez 95.He drives at Datsun 120Y!! - Ssor Retalp 96.He has some sort of discusting growth near his testicles! I think he calls it a penis!! - Ssor Retalp 97.I've always thought so. - Esther M'Lestor 98.I just don't think this is funny anymore - Boring 99.because i love him - seriious 100.He hurt me in a way jaded lovers usually do. - Mrs. Vadge "- whoever" means that that kid sent it in. Just thought I might clarify that for the 'less bright' champions.

Hmm, quite the list. Some very cool kids have tried to be funny, and some have failed and some have done quite well. Either way, now you can contribute to the growing list of reasons to hate Matt, simply by filling out the boxes below.