SCIENTIFIC ANALYZE OF WOMAN...
 
 
Item: Chemical Analysis
Subject: Women
Symbol: Wo
Discovered by: Adam 
Atomic Weight: 
 		 Average expected as 118, but there are known isotopes ranging from 100 to 160.
Occurrence: Surplus quantities in all urban areas.
 
CHEMICAL PROPERTIES 
     1.  Posses great affinity for Gold (Au), Silver (Ag), Platinum (Pt), precious and semi-precious stones and minerals. 
     2.  Capable of absorbing great quantities of expensive substances. 
     3.  May explode spontaneously if left alone with male. 
     4.  Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased with saturation in ethanol (alcohol). 
     5.  Yields to pressure if applied in the correct manner.  

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES 
     1.  Surface usually covered in painted film. 
     2.  Boils at nothing and freezes without reason. 
     3.  Melts if given proper treatment. 
     4.  Bitter if used incorrectly. 
     5.  Found in various states in nature, ranging from virgin metal to common ore. 

COMMON USES 
     1.  Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars. 
     2.  Most powerful reducing agent of money known. 
     3.  Can aid in relaxation. 

TESTS 
     1.  Pure specimens turn rosy tint if discovered in natural state. 
     2.  Turns bright green if placed beside better specimen. 

CAUTION 
     1.  Highly dangerous in inexperienced hands. 
     2.  Illegal to posses more than one permanent specimen.