Redemptions of the Heart

By Oprelia

Rating: PG-13

Code: P, J/P

Category: VOYAGER

Genre: Action/Adventure/Romance

Disclaimer: STAR TREK: VOYAGER and all its characters contained within this story are owned exclusively by Paramount Pictures Corporation. No copyright infringements are intended.

Author's Note: This chapter approximately appears during the last 10 minutes of Endgame

Chapter One

Shattered Dreams

*****

Stardate 54991.8

Explosions are occurring all across the bridge and the whole ship shudders as Sphere 634 continued firing on the small Intrepid class ship relentlessly with its newly assimilated knowledge of the ablative armour technology. The atmosphere was tense as they tried to evade the sphere.

"Aft armour is down to six percent" reports Tuvok. The ship continues to spark and shudder.

"Hull breaches on decks six through twelve!" shouts Harry.

"I can't stay ahead of them, Captain!" says Tom as he tries to stay ahead of the sphere

"The armour is failing" Tuvok states to everyone. Chakotay now staggers towards Seven of Nine at the secondary tactical console behind the command chairs.

"Where is the nearest aperture?" demands Chakotay.

"Approximately 30 seconds ahead... but it leads back to the Delta Quadrant" replies Seven. Everyone knows what that means if they alter course. However the Captain has to make the final decision.

"Mr. Paris, prepare to adjust your heading".

"Yes ma'am" Tom calmly replies. They continue on that heading for another twenty seconds before alarms on both Tom and Seven's consoles suddenly start blaring.

"Captain, the transwarp conduit ahead is collapsing! I don't think that we will exit the transwarp conduit in time!" shouts Tom. Janeway leaps out of her chair and rushes to the helm.

"Tom, alter course to the new aperture now!"

"Aye captain. Course has been altered" stated Paris. Behind them the Borg sphere changed heading and followed them into the new aperture.

"Captain, the sphere has followed us into the this aperture. Aft armour has failed. Major damage has occurred on all decks. I don't know how long we can keep this up!" reports Harry from his console. Meanwhile the sphere recommenced its attack on the Starfleet vessel.

"Captain, the conduit is collapsing behind the sphere. If we can hold on for another minute, the conduit should crush the sphere" Seven reports. "However we will also be crushed ten seconds after that".

"We should be out of the conduit by then Seven. I'm reading an exit aperture ahead of us in one minute and five seconds at current speeds" reports Tom. "It's going to be tight though"

"One step at a time Tom" Janeway says as she joins Tom at his console. However just as the sphere is being crushed by the collapsing conduit, the Borg vessel fires a last volley onto the ship

BOOM

"Exiting the transwarp conduit now" says Tom.

"All stop. Damage report!" barks out the captain

"Multiple hull breaches have occurred, decks five through twelve. Decks four and five has also sustained heavy structural damage. Harry reports

"Deck Five? Which sections?". Everyone on the bridge knew of the importance of Deck Five and as they waited for Harry's reply they were silently hoping that Sickbay was not damaged.

"Deck Five, sections nine though seventeen Captain!" Harry exclaims.

"B'ELANNA!" Tom shouts out in horror as he realises that his wife and child might be in danger.

"Bridge to sickbay!" hailed the captain urgently. Silence is the only answer. Tom starts to stand up. "Janeway to the doctor! Please respond!" Still no answer.

"Permission to leave the bridge captain!" asks Tom with a strangled voice.

"Permission granted... Commander, take the helm. Harry..." Before the captain had even finished Tom started sprinting towards the turbolift. It seemed like an eternity to Tom as he waited for the turbolift to deposit him onto Deck Five. When the lift reached the deck, he sprinted out even before the doors were completely open. He ran but twenty metres before he stopped in front of the devastation that blocked the hallway. The whole ceiling of deck five beyond that point had collapsed, bringing down live wires and debris from deck four. He started scrambling up through the debris, disregarding all the dangers inherent in moving through active wires and shifting metal as he desperately climbed towards sickbay. It took him five minutes to reach sickbay but it was a futile effort. The state of sickbay was even worse than the corridor. The main surgical bay was crushed with a giant piece of ceiling. Even the doctor's office didn't escape the destruction.

He hadn't even realised that the Harry had followed him he felt a hand on his shoulder. Together they slowly moved towards the surgical bay and they attempted to shift the debris.

"Harry, help me move this piece. They might still be okay!" pleaded Tom desperately. Harry knew that Tom would not listen to reason and so he silently grabbed one end of the large piece of the ceiling and attempted to raise it. It was however too heavy to be lifted by two humans and they struggled for over a minute before Tom gave up and collapsed onto what now was the floor.

"They can't be gone Harry" stated Tom as he tried to ignore the pain in his heart. "They can't... Just when everything was going right! Why do all these things have to happen to me?"

"I'm sorry Tom. I really am. I can't understand what you are going through but I'll be there for you. Everything will be all right" Harry said quietly as he tried to comfort his best friend.

"But it won't be all right! They are gone!" says Tom. He starts to pound on the floor but it starts to shift so he immediately stops. They sat there in mutual silence for at least ten minutes before the comm. chirped to break the silence.

::: Janeway to Paris :::

"Go ahead" said a subdued Tom. The tears had stopped falling three minutes previously and he was feeling quite numb.

::: What is the status of sickbay? :::

"The main surgical bay and the Doc's office have both caved in captain. I believe that B'Elanna is dead Captain. There is a large piece of ceiling that has totally crushed the main surgical bay. Harry and I cannot shift it. It has been over ten minutes and if B'Elanna had survived, she would have woken up by now. The doctor is also offline. I think that the computer terminal was damaged during the attack. I have found his portable emitter but his program was not been loaded into it.

::: I'm sorry Tom. However since sickbay has been severely damaged, we need you to set up a temporary triage station in the messhall. Ensign Wildman is on her way but we need your expertise as Chief Field Medic to go to treat the wounded. I know that this is a hard time for you but your skills are desperately needed :::

"Yes Captain. I'll do my best"

::: Understood. Janeway out :::

"Tom, are you sure you're okay with this?" asked Harry.

"Not really, but there isn't much use for me to sit here while people need my help. I'll guess I'll just cry later. Besides, I think that I need to work to keep my mind occupied. Help me get over to the supply cabinet and retrieve as many drugs, hyposprays and some medical tricorders. We will have a lot to do".

"Yes Tom. I'll help you" replied Harry as they climbed over to the remains of the supply cabinet.

* * * * *

Forty-Six Hours Later

"I'm sorry Tom. I could not save them. It all happened so suddenly. The ceiling collapsed just after I delivered your daughter. I had just placed her in B'Elanna's arm when the ceiling suddenly collapsed. I tried to clear the debris but then my computer in the office exploded and I went offline. I can assure you that they died instantly with no pain".

"Thanks Doc. I appreciate it" replied the subdued helmsman. He was clearly exhausted as he performed all the medical operations non-stop since the collapse of the conduit. Harry and Tom had appropriated a cart and loaded up all the drugs that survived the devastation, some vital medical equipment including scanning equipment, regenerators and stimulators. They then carried it back to the turbolift and up to deck two where an emergency triage station had been set up. The room was littered with injured people and Tom immediately started scanning them with a medical tricorder. When Samantha Wildman came in, her gaze swept around the room and noticed all the injured and immediately retrieved a tricorder to help with the treatments.

Luckily there were no life-threatening injuries. Most were broken bones or severe burns but Tom and Sam were well equipped to deal with those injuries. There were a few extremely serious injuries which took most of Tom's attention. A brain haemorrhage was the most serious when the ceiling of deck five fell Crewman Robertson. He had to improvise with the limited equipment that was available but the haemorrhage finally brought under control, With the doctor's program still deactivated, Tom had then stayed up all night and day to care for the remaining patients while the crew worked around the clock to repair the severe damage to the ship.

"I'm placing in a commendation in your file about your performance in treating all the injured, especially during a time when your were experiencing extreme emotional distress. I'm proud of you Tom" said the doctor however Tom's tight control over his emotions began to loosen.

"Thanks Doc" was the choked out reply from Tom. He tried to calm down when he realised how close he was to crying again.

"Tom" called the captain as she walked over to him. Tom wasn't the only one who wanted to cry. She had ordered them into the conduit and now B'Elanna was dead. She knew that she gave them all the option of rejecting the alteration of the mission home but she was the Captain and every death weighed heavily on her. Especially the deaths of a young woman whom she was very fond of and was also the wife of her protégé and their daughter. She did not want to confront Tom right now because she did not know whether she was ready to hear his anger. She knew that Tom was always kind-hearted and mischievous, but when he was serious, his words would be able to cut through her heart like a hot knife through butter. She was expecting the worse.

"Yes Captain?"

"I'm very sorry Tom. Maybe if I used the remaining torpedoes, B'Elanna and your daughter would still be alive. This is all my fault. I'm so sorry. We should never have tried to destroy the conduit. I should have listened to the admiral and brought us home".

"It's not your fault captain. We all agreed that it was worth the risk. It's as much my fault as yours. I should have been able to stay clear of the sphere but that last shot was able to connect with the ship". His reply surprised her when she was clearly expecting condemnation and scorn. She was prepared to endure his anger but not his absolution and self-recrimination.

"No Tom. I'm the one at fault!" protested the captain but she was cut off by an unlikely source.

"No captain. Neither of you are at fault. As Tom has stated, Captain, you are not at fault. And Tom, it is only your grief that is making you say that it is your fault. But the truth is that the the Borg is really the one at fault. It is the Borg Queen who would have ordered the sphere to intercept the vessel. I believe that the Queen was trying to destroy us to change the timeline" stated the doctor.

"Explain what you mean Doc" asked Tom. His head had shot up when he heard the doctor correct them.

"Well since Admiral Janeway is your future self, I believe that if the Borg Queen tried to destroy Voyager to alter the timeline. If the sphere was able to destroy Voyager, then Admiral Janeway would cease to exist and she would not be able to start this whole incident".

"But then it is still my fault. Admiral Janeway was the initial one who changed the timeline. And I accepted her help! It was my future self that created this fiasco that caused your beloved wife and daughter to die!" exclaimed Janeway.

"No Captain. It is not your fault. That timeline does not exist anymore. Do not blame yourself for it. I certainly don't. Now if you'll excuse me Captain, Doc, I have some patients to look after" said Tom has he moved towards the patients.

"Doctor, Tom clearly needs to rest. He has not slept for at least two days. I think that he has been injecting himself with stimulants. He is about to crash Doctor" pleaded the captain. She knew that she would not be able to get Tom to sleep. She had already ordered him three times to no avail. Even Harry had no success.

"I will captain. And you must know that I meant everything I said about the changes in the timeline. You are not at fault Captain" said the doctor softly to the captain/

"Oh, just listening about time is giving me a headache. Please get Tom to sleep doctor. He really needs it."

"Yes Captain" replied the doctor.

*****

    Next: Chapter Two