????? Only another woman who has lost a child can ever really begin to understand what a mother feels to lose her child. The death of my son was a turning point in my life. When I lost this child, I realized, that without a doubt, life isn?t always fair. This was the child I had wanted my entire life. To never leave the hospital with him was the most painful experience of my life. However, it forever changed my views and my level of compassion for others that go through a similiar experience. I know now that a mother never stops missing her child, no matter how briefly she/he was a part of her life.

????? If I could wish only one good thing for any child it would be to have a Daddy like I had. My Dad was the most gentle man I have ever known. He never once in his life ever raised a hand to me. One of nine children, he was used to hard work and most of his life I remember him working two jobs to give my sister & I everything we could ever want. Deeply patriotic, he fought along with five of his brothers in WWII, an experience that touched him profoundly. I inherited my love of animals from him. His death at 61 from lung cancer was a great loss not only for my family but to his many many friends. I believe it was into his welcoming arms that the angels placed my son when he died.

????? I have never met a person who knew my Mom that did not love her. She was the core of our family. My beliefs on what a ?family? means came from her. She also taught me about unconditional love. Her home was open to anyone and everyone. She never locked the door. I used to get so mad because we always had company. Only as I grew older did I realize what a tribute that was to how welcome Mom made everyone. One of 12 children, Mom grew up being a ?mom? to her younger siblings and to anyone else that needed a ?mom.? Only when she died and I saw the outpouring of grief from such a variety of people, did I realize how many people loved her. How lucky I was to have had her for a mother!

????? I knew this man for eight short years, but what he brought to my life couldn?t be measured in lifetimes. I met him in college and we became instant friends. He made me laugh more than anyone ever has and he could make me madder than anyone, also. But no matter how mad I was, one smile from him could melt my heart and all was forgiven. My one regret is that I never gave him the child he wanted so desperately. He would have been a wonderful father even if only for a short time. His death from AIDS in 1986 when it was such a new disease was a profile in courage. He faced such rejection and fear from those who did not understand the disease but it didn?t break his spirit. He fought until the end. I miss him every day of my life and will hold him in my heart forever.

????? Almost every summer of my teen years was spent in Fredericksburg, Virginia (my mother?s birthplace). It was this aunt, not even a blood aunt, that took care of me every summer. Earlene had been my mother?s best friend and that is how she met and married my mom?s brother, Tody. Everyone needs an aunt like Earlene; she was funny, she loved to go dancing and have fun, she never met a stranger. I would cry for hours every year at the end of the summer when I had to come back to Ohio. Her daughter, Sheila, and I are the same age and Earlene lives on in Sheila. She is so like her Mom and I cherish every moment with her. Aunt Earlene?s death at 42, of cancer, after years of suffering is as painful to think of today as it was 33 years ago. What a loss. She?s the relative I am really sorry my daughter never got to know. To know her was to love her.

????? Funny, the only other person that had a profound influence on my life was another woman who was my aunt by marriage. She was always my favorite aunt on my Dad?s side of the family but even more so after I moved in with her for a couple months while my mom was in Georgia with my pregnant sister. I was 13 at the time. She treated me as one of her own. There was never anything that I could not talk to her about and her views on religion and God were the ones that opened my own understanding and hunger for a spiritual side to my life. She was only 51 when she died in her sleep. I have always felt her presence in my life and still do even to this day. Without a doubt, an angel in our midst!

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