HAVE YOU AND ANOTHER PERSON EVER TALKED ABOUT MASTURBATION?

[Notes: Many people remarked that talking about masturbation with friends was limited to locker-room joking. A lot of teenagers also mentioned that these jokes implied that anyone who masturbated was sick or homosexual. Of course, that's a completely ridiculous conclusion to draw, but typical for that age. Everyone who had discussed it seriously, though, made it clear what a relief it was to talk about it openly and to realize they weren't the only ones who did it.]

I talked about masturbation for the first time one day when I was changing clothes after swimming. A younger guy (a year and a half younger) saw my developed genitals and asked me why they were so big. I told him about how his would get like that, and then he asked me if I had ever masturbated. I shyly admitted yes. We discussed how I stroked myself and what it was like to ejaculate. Around a year later he told me he had begun masturbating, and that it was the greatest thing he had ever felt. I thought it was important to talk to him about it so he wouldn't feel weird or dumb.
- age 17, Alabama

I talked with my friend a few times about masturbation. We talked about the way we do it and how we felt during and afterwards. We masturbated a few times together, but we were on different sides of the room, and under our own covers. I'm not quite sure how it came up, but I find it interesting talking to another boy, finding out how he does things, and discovering things each of us does that are the same.
- age 14, Pennsylvania

I have talked to someone about masturbation. We were just talking and I asked if he ever played with himself, and he said he would answer if I told him first. Since we were both kind of embarrassed about it, we wrote the answer down on a piece of paper and gave it to the other person. I was shocked and surprised when his piece of paper said yes (as mine did). I was relieved because I had never told anybody else that I masturbated (and at the time I was feeling really guilty about it).
- age 14, Washington

All the time. Masturbation first came up between us when we were talking about sex -- imagine that. Then I told him about JackinWorld. We were talking about how often we masturbated, how we did it, when, and things like that. Now we share techniques. We are very open about masturbating and treat it like a gift from God.
- age 16, Missouri

Some friends and I were all spending the night at one's house and we were wide awake, and I laughed to myself and said, "so-and-so says he doesn't masturbate. What a liar!" And one of my friends said, "Hey, do you guys do it lubricated, or am I the only one?" This shocked me, but I was very pleased that I had broken the ice and they had come forward. I told him I did it dry, and so did my other friend. This sparked many branches of discussion on the topic, and now that we know we all do it, we are a lot more comfortable about it and, in a way, a lot closer as friends.
- age 15, California

My older brother taught me to masturbate at the age of 9. We talked about it constantly and therefore it was natural for me to talk about it with my friends. I can't remember NOT talking about it and how much pleasure it gives me. I guess because of all the talking, it was also natural to begin masturbating together. I don't remember ever touching one another, but it sure was fun to discuss and share. I have many fond memories of the close ties I had with my friends because of the shared joy.
- age 62, Texas

I have never discussed masturbation with another male beyond admitting to doing it, in that sort of locker-room bantering way. Females (mostly girlfriends, past and present) have usually been more forthcoming about such matters, to my surprise. Virtually all of my girlfriends (and a few women who are platonic friends) have told me they masturbate, though few have overcome their shyness enough to do it in front of me -- too bad, too, because that is a favorite fantasy of mine. I remember when I was younger (in my teens) I often wished I could talk about it with my friends, just to confirm that I was going through a normal process of maturation. If the Internet can provide forums like this to share factual information to youngsters going through puberty, I'm all for it.
- age 34, California

It came up with my mom. She caught me and was very uncomfortable. She thought that it was bad for me and told me not to do it ever again. Of course I did not listen to her!
- age 18, Wisconsin

Thanks to JackinWorld, I've been able to discuss masturbation at great length on the chat site. I haven't talked to anyone in person, but now that I know most guys do what I've been enjoying for a couple of years, I won't be so bashful about bringing it up with some of my friends.
- age 13, Texas

My best friend (who is a girl) and I were talking about the Spice Girls. I said the blonde one was cute. Then she said I probably liked to sit in front of the TV and masturbate, and I said, "Oh yeah -- pass the hand lotion." She just stood there and asked "What's that for?" I broke out laughing. We went on to discuss how men masturbate. She thought it was fascinating how men don't "get wet" when they get horny. Then she asked me if I did, and I said yeah, I do it every night. She just went on about how relieved she was that she wasn't the only one who masturbated. We've been really open since then.
- age 15, Maine

My friends and I talk about it because we all know we do it! We've done it in front of each other before while watching videos and stuff. We talk about it like it's a normal part of everyday life, which for us it is! There's nothing embarrassing about it. We've even gotten quite open about how often, when, where, and other details. No biggie for us.
- age 27, Ohio

My 7-year-old brother walked in on me in the bathroom. I was in the bathtub and was just finishing masturbating. I was at that point of no return and there wasn't a whole lot I could do, so I started to ejaculate. My brother stood there bug-eyed just watching it all. I told him to close the door and I gave him his first ever sex talk. I explained about men and women having sex and that sperm made babies, and that someday he would need to do what I was doing every so often. He wanted me to do it again for him and I told him some other time. The very next day I had to ejaculate again to show a couple of his friends and answer their questions.
- age 14, Alabama

While I was in military service attending a service school, one of the guys in my class sat down beside me during the evening meal and asked me point blank, "Hey dude, do you masturbate?" A guy sitting across the table from us had a startled expression on his face! My answer to him was, "Whether I do or do not masturbate is none of your f***ing business!" Nothing more was ever said about it. I was 24 at the time and enjoyed masturbating 2 or 3 times a week.
- age 35, California

A straight friend and I were discussing porno films and what purpose they serve, when I made the remark that I can "change hands and not miss a beat." This intrigued him, and I wound up explaining how I would slow down the stroking, add the second hand, remove the first hand, and return to the desired stroking speed. While he discussed VERY briefly how he "grabbed and ran," it was clear that he found this technique interesting -- especially the idea of prolonging the session and therefore possibly enjoying it more (the rubbing as well as the orgasm). We haven't discussed anything since (he's married), so don't know if he's tried it. Neither of us are exhibitionist/voyeur types, but at least being able to talk about it is, I think, very good.
- age 41, New Mexico

I have tried with several friends, but none of them seemed to want to admit they do it. Most of them just start talking about how "nasty" it is, and then they change the subject. But I'm almost positive they all do it.
- age 13, Canada

I talked once with my best friend about masturbation. We were discussing how bad girls are at masturbating guys. They just don't know how to touch the penis. We then talked about how we masturbate. My best friend doesn't use his hands when he masturbates, but pushes his penis against his mattress. He said this better simulated the sex act. However, I said this was far too messy, as I would be afraid that I would mess up the sheet! I then explained how I masturbated conventionally. We actually got so worked up that I showed him how to masturbate my way and he showed me how to do it his way. Then we did it together, so we could actually see what both did. I actually TOUCHED my best friend's penis when he was trying to masturbate "my way," and he ejaculated within seconds after I touched it. Then, he showed me how to masturbate his way and got on top of me and started rubbing his penis against my penis. I have never had a better orgasm with myself or any girl! We agreed that guys don't have to be gay to do this as long as we "love girls" but can still masturbate with other guys. It not only feels great but it has made us closer friends.
- age 17, Ohio

I talk about it a lot with some of my friends -- some guys and one girl. We usually talk about when we do it and how we do it, but she is usually asking the questions, and my friends and I answer, but sometimes we guys ask each other how we do it. We mostly talk about how often we each do it. I do it about 5-7 times a week, the other guys do it about 1-2 times a week, and she claims that she has never done it. Yeah, right.
- age 17, Arizona

I was getting to know my best friend better, just hanging out in his town taking care of some things he had to do. I started to get bored and made a dumb joke about masturbation. He was surprised and told me it was "sick and wrong," among other things. He told me he has never and will never do it. Well, I was in shock. We had a talk a few weeks later when we were on vacation together at this camp, and he told me most of what he'd said was because he wasn't sure how I would react about masturbation. He told me he does not think it is "sick" or "wrong" -- just that he has never done it or wanted to, as he as always been with a girl. Now he makes love with his girlfriend on a regular basis, so he says he cannot see why he should masturbate. He told me he also did not know how, so I told him how. He thinks touching his own genitals is strange, but what grosses him out is ejaculating on himself. We both told each other our thoughts and agree that we don't see things the same way. We understand that we feel different about this matter and that is fine. His reason is personal -- not just a blanket statement.
- age 18, New Hampshire

I've talked about it with my best friend and my 13-year-old brother, plus we joke about it at school. The first time with my friend, we were watching the TV show "Real Sex" in my room and we just started talking about sex and masturbation and how it sucked that no one ever talked about masturbating, even though everyone does it. We told each other about our first times also. That was about a year ago, and we have yet to masturbate in front of each other -- although I don't really care anymore because I have a girlfriend now.
- age 15, New York

My friends and I talk about it often. Truthfully, we talk about it freely. Here's a funny story that goes along with the question: My school has Internet capability. I told my friends about JackinWorld, and they decided to check it out. Well, after several visits, one of them got caught. "We do not need THAT here!" It was so funny we laughed our butts off. We still talk about that and joke about it.
- age 16, Illinois

I was about 11 years old and many of my friends were beginning to get the "birds and the bees" talks from their parents. Mine were more bashful about such things than most, so all of what I was picking up was from my friends on the schoolground. (Health class was not for another year, when we reached 6th grade.) Several of them were comparing information they had received from their dads, from books given to them, and from older brothers. The topic of masturbation came up, and it was something I had never dreamed of! None of us had any first-hand experience, and it was pretty much just talk. We wondered aloud how it was done, what would happen, what it would feel like, how much semen there would be, and what to do with it. There was a lot of misinformation about technique, etc.; one boy said he thought the sperm traveled through the pubic hair. We talked about it on several different occasions, but we never really discussed our personal experiences.
- age 36, Texas

Many times -- it is the first question I ask girls when I become friends with them. My friends (guys and girls) both just talk about how often and how we do it. The guys seem to be more open about it, though; they just tell it how it is. The girls take some Q&A from both of us to open up. They usually ask me a bunch of questions first, and then they're almost as open about it as us men folk.
- age 15, Illinois

Yes -- in the locker room, we were just talking about how you have to release the tension by masturbating. Then they asked me if I masturbated. I said nothing because I did not know if it was a trap to catch me and make fun of me, even though they are my friends. So I never told them that I masturbate.
- age 16, Illinois

I jokingly asked a good friend if he masturbated. He was reluctant to answer and instead asked if I did. We continued to play a childish game of "Do you?," asking each other the question over and over, until finally I answered. I guess I was just curious, but it brought us closer as friends because we can now talk about it openly.
- age 16, Indiana

It was with a girl friend of mine; she said that she believes every guy does it ... I told her that there are two kinds of liars in this world: one kind says they have never done it -- the other kind says they quit doing it yesterday!
- age 18, Tennessee

My friend (a girl) and I were talking on the phone and watching a movie, and they were talking about masturbation. So we started talking about it, and she told me she masturbated, and I was shocked. I was only 12 and I didn't know girls could do it. (Well, of course, not the way WE do it.) Since then we talk about it freely to each other. We have "mutual masturbation" over the phone. We are very close now.
- age 15, Georgia

In my early teens, a friend was spending the night, and after watching one of those mid-'80s T&A teen sex comedies, we started talking about one of the girls in the movie, which somehow led to talking about masturbation. He thought you couldn't ejaculate by masturbating. I finally had to prove it. Years later, my college roommate and I were watching an X-rated video when he said he might have to "take care of himself" when he got home. I told him not to worry about it, and we both ended up masturbating to the video. After that, we didn't think twice about it when we had to answer nature's call.
- age 27, Texas

When I am with friends, we talk about it some -- but it is mostly in a joking manner. Although I wish I did have someone whom I could seriously talk with about masturbation, there are not many people my age who can really talk about it without calling each other gay for masturbating in the first place.
- age 14, North Carolina

Three of us went to a club to hear some punk bands. One band had this awesome song about masturbation. We were singing it and laughing about it in the car on the way home. Next day at our cafeteria table, one of these same guys pulled out a list of synonyms for masturbation he took off the Web and read them. We broke up because most were pretty funny. Then the whole lunch table started talking about it! I couldnąt believe it -- guys just opened up and told where they did it, how often, how they hold themselves when they do it, etc. People around us could hear the conversation, but no one seemed to care. It was great! I didn't want to go back to algebra!
- age 16, Ohio

A buddy and I always go to my room to use my computer to play games and surf the Web. We know this is going to happen: Sooner or later one us grabs the other and we start wrestling on my bed. Then we get erections and hump one another a little -- with all our clothes on, of course. One time not too long ago the wrestling led to more grab-ass stuff than usual, and my friend rolled off me and asked if I ever "pull off." I said I do at least once per day. He said he does it five or six times! He wanted me to show how I did it, so I locked my door and we laid next to each other on my bed, pulled out our penises, and went to town. Later, my mom asked me why I had locked my door. I told her my friend wanted to try on a pair of my pants to see if he could borrow them sometime. A lame excuse, but it worked.
- age 13, Georgia

My best friend and I are pretty open with each other and have talked about techniques in the past. It just came up one night after joking about it. I said I was more into the mattress-humping method and he used his hand. We've never watched each other or participated in the habits of the other one, but we can easily talk about it.
- age 21, California

You probably won't believe this, but I have never talked with anyone about masturbation. After reading the stories told by guys from age 12 to their 20's in JackinWorld, I feel envious. I wish things had been different for me. How many other guys out there have had a similar life? In fact, when I was in school (7th-12th grades), being accused of masturbating was a put-down. Since I regularly enjoyed the experience, I felt like an outsider. It is good to learn at my age that guys today are more open and sharing about masturbation and other sexual experiences. I regret that I missed out on all of that!
- age 35, California

A few weeks ago, a friend asked me how often I masturbate, and I replied honestly, about once a day. It was the first time I've ever spoken to anyone about my personal habits. I don't feel a big need to talk about masturbation these days, but back in my "glory years" of 15 to 18, when I was whipping it out 4-5 times a day, I really wish I'd had someone to talk with about it. Reading this Web site, you get the initial impression that every teenage boy is having regular conversations about his habits, but I tend to think the great majority of guys that age are like I was -- doing it completely in secret, and feeling a little guilty and even weird over yanking on your penis with such alarming frequency. My friends and I at the time never talked about masturbation (though I'm sure we all did it), instead choosing to lie about our prowess with girls, which was pretty much nonexistent. If we had talked about our masturbation, I imagine we'd all have felt better about ourselves, and more normal. I'd urge teenagers to talk about it with your friends if you feel weird about it -- you're doing it, they're doing it, and no one is the worse for it.
- age 24, North Dakota


Courtesy of JackinWorld

This page hosted by GeoCitiesGet your own Free Home Page