Second Chances 
Author: Alan Taylor
Rated PG


At the 5th Doctor's suggestion, Tegan and Turlough go out for a meal.

          
                                                                                      =========
                             

 Her offer came out of the blue.

 I was lying back on the bed in my room, reading a comic left behind by
the kid that used to have it when she came knocking on my door. Of
course that threw me - she was never usually that polite to me. And of
course, it gave me a chance to hide the comic. Comics are, after all,
for kids.

 I gave it an extra second, just to annoy her. "Come in."

 She let the door swing open. I notice that she didn't come in, just
sort of slumped herself against the frame of the door, her face half in
shadow. She looked exhausted. I could hardly blame her - the last few
days had been... packed... 

 "Tegan, are you all right?" I asked, cursing myself for not thinking of
something more sarcastic to say.

 "Look," she began, every word an effort. "Like it or not, we're stuck
together. I thought... I thought that we should take some time to try to
get to know each other better."

 "That sounds like a splendid idea." Actually, it sounded like one of
the Doctor's ideas, and while he was providing my travel ticket I was
hardly going to risk offending him.

 "We're going out for dinner - just you and me. You have two hours to
get ready."

She turned and left. I wanted to yell after her, to get her to shut the
door behind her, to ask her how on earth she thought it would take me
two hours to get ready for dinner.
 Instead I swung my legs round, slipped my shoes on, took a look around
my room and went in search of the Doctor.

 He was on his hands and knees in the console room, in the middle of a
spread of tools and components. Three roundels were opened, their
spaghetti of wiring pulled free and hanging loose. His jacket lay over
the console, and he was whistling.
 "Not getting ready for dinner?" he asked, looking up at me with a broad
grin on his face.

 I ignored the question. "What are you doing?"

 "When the TARDIS is working properly, she is capable of many things,
Turlough, not least of which is the fact that she should be in a state
of Temporal Grace."

 "Which means?"

 "Weapons shouldn't work in here."  He paused.  "It was something Nyssa was always on at me to fix."

 It was one of those awkward, silent moments when someone really needed
to say something.  "You really miss her, don't you."

 She'd only been gone a few days, but the atmosphere in the TARDIS had
changed noticeably. Tegan had been even sulkier and suspicious, and the
Doctor had thrown himself into repair work. He was still as outwardly
cheerful as ever, but he was doing more repairs than anything else,
spending more time alone.

 He sighed and leapt to his feet in an energetic bound.  "Yes, Turlough, but 
not as much as Tegan does. And that's why you really ought to make an effort. 
She really wants to get to know you

better, to try to get on better with you."



 I suddenly felt about two inches high.



 He pulled an origami crane from the left pocket of his trousers,

unfolded it carefully and smoothed it out on the console.
 "You'll need to get changed. I'll draw you a map." And with a few deft

strokes he managed to produce a ridiculously complicated floor plan of

the TARDIS with a clear route showing me to an area I hadn't been in

before. He handed it to me. I stood there, the map in my hands, until he

shooed me out of the console room. 



 I wound up in a wardrobe. A typical TARDIS wardrobe, of course, about a

hundred feet on each side. Wall to wall formal evening wear. And by the

time I got there the crane had refolded itself.

 I hate penguin suits. They remind me of school uniform which reminds me

of my miserable years at Brendon. Of course, I was still wearing that

school uniform that I hated so much. A dinner jacket wasn't that much

worse. And the Doctor seemed to think it was a good idea.



 I found one in my size and took it back to my room.



 I ran a hand across my chin. Stubble didn't seem right with a dinner

suit so I shaved, and took a quick shower before changing. The end

result - well, I surprised myself. I kind of suited it. Of course my bow

tie was squint, and my hair was falling over my eyes, but I thought that

added to my charm. Then I realised that I was trying to impress her -

Tegan of all people - and I wrinkled up my nose at my reflection. Much

better.



 The Doctor was still tinkering in the console room. He'd disconnected

the scanner, and it was leaning against the hat stand.. A half eaten

apple lay discarded on the floor, and he was lying half under the

console. He had taken his shoes off.
 "There you are," he said to my knees. "And just in time - we've

arrived. Why don't you go out and wait for Tegan."



 "I could stay here, give you a hand."



 "I'm fine, Turlough. Why don't you go out and wait." He didn't leave me

much choice.



 Twilight.



 The moon just rising, the stars barely visible, and a purple hint on

the horizon. I stood on the balcony inhaling the fragrant fresh air,

looking down over the mangrove swamp to the moonlight-dappled bay. The

champagne was pleasant - not too sweet, not too dry, and somewhere

nearby a gentle waltz was playing.



 Only one thing could spoil the mood.



 "Well?" she demanded in her grating accent, and I turned.



 I'd seen her in a dress before, of course, but that was on Wrack's

ship. My mind had been on other things, back then, and the dress had

been less... flattering. And come to think of it she'd had that silly

wig on, too.


 The dress she had chosen was a lot shorter - just above the knee, and a

lot tighter. She'd done something to her hair too - little curls by the

ears that were kind of nice, and highlighted her cheekbones.



 I inhaled deeply as she strode towards me.



 "Well, what can I say?" I spluttered.



 "If you were a gentleman you would have said something nice by now."



 "You - you look stunning."



 "I guess that'll do. You don't scrub up too badly yourself. You did get

me a drink, didn't you?"



 "Of course, of course."



 I reached out for it, brushed it with my hand and the glass fell to the

stone floor, shattering with a delicate tinkling noise.

 I thought Tegan was going to shout at me for a second - she was looking

at me in that "I'm going to shout at you" way that she had - and then a

waitress appeared from the shadows with a replacement glass - Tegan

accepted graciously and just chuckled. I smiled too, but I'm sure it

looked forced. I've never had much to smile about. I hoped I looked

endearing. I really wanted her to like me.



 Wherever I've been on Earth, people have liked me. I've never had any

shortage of friends. Of course, I'd never met anyone quite like Tegan

before.



 "Stop gawking, and let's go inside," she suggested. I hadn't realised I

was gawking. Gods, how childish I must seem to her. A severe looking man

with a beaky nose escorted us to our table, and gave us our menus. I

shot a glance over my shoulder, just reassuring myself that the bulky

shadow of the Police Box still loomed outside.



 Tegan laughed softy as a waiter brought menus. "You're really jumpy,

aren't you. What are you afraid of?"



 "You ask very pointed questions." I replied.



 "I know. It's part of your charm."



 "I hesitate to think what the rest of it is." I muttered.



 "I'm sorry?"



 "Nothing, nothing."



 It couldn't hurt to tell her what I was afraid of. After all, this was

the woman I'd spent many a happy hour wandering around ventilation

shafts with. But not yet.



 I let her order for us. For one thing, the menu was in Japanese, and I

didn't understand a word of it.  When the wine arrived, I sat and ran my finger around the rim of the

glass, staring into its russet depths.

 "So where did you learn Japanese?" I was desperate for something to

say... it all felt so awkward.



 "I spent a year in Japan when I was fifteen, with my dad. It was just

after my folks split up and both went to different countries."



 "That must have been very hard for you."



 "It was better than the fighting. And Tokyo was a great place to live.

Great shopping, nice people."



 "Overcrowding, Godzilla attacking, gang warfare, getting nuked every

ten minutes."



 "They let you watch too much Manga at that school of yours."



 I didn't know what she was talking about, so I nodded.



 The shrimp starter arrived, and Tegan helped me with using the

chopsticks.



 "Anyway, from sixteen to twenty I spent my time between Tokyo, home,

and London. It gets to a point where you feel more at home when you're

travelling than anywhere else."



 "I know what you mean. Is that why you wanted to be an air hostess?"



 "I reckon so. But I also wanted to settle down, the way my parents

never really did. I suppose..."

 She let the sentence hang there, drank some wine, ate some shrimp. I

wanted to know what she had to say, but if I asked, she was going to

snap my head off.



 "I suppose that's why I stay with the Doctor. Every time we land on

Earth, I say to myself that I'm going to go home, and every time I

choose to stay. It's like travelling, but taking your roots with you,

taking your family."



 "I really want to be part of that family, Tegan." That sounded

insincere and we both knew it. Even when I was trying to be nice, I

wound her up. No wonder she hated me.



 And then of course, I realised that she wanted to be here about as much

as I did - possibly even less in fact. Bizarrely, that made me feel that

we had something in common. Not particularly liking each other, but

making the effort for the sake of the Doctor.



 "You never talk about your family." she said.



 "No, I don't."



 We finished off the course in silence, and our dishes were replaced

with a large dish of spicy lamb.



 "This is delicious," I said, through a mouthful.



 "You're gross," she replied, delicately shovelling it into her face.



 "This from a woman who claims to be just a mouth on legs."



 She stuck out her tongue at me. I responded in kind.



 On the other side of the room, waiters busied themselves around some

new arrivals; a man with shoulder length hair, and a striking blonde in

an electric blue ball gown. I watched her graceful movements. Suddenly,

Tegan was talking at me again, trying to get the conversation jump-

started.



 "Anyway, what did you think you were doing?"



 "When?"



 "All that business with trying to kill the Doctor."
 "Oh, that."

 "You say that like it was nothing."

 I thought carefully about what to say next.
 "I was terrified, Tegan. I was afraid for my life. I didn't want to
kill the Doctor, really I didn't. But the power of the Guardian... It
was so overwhelming. You could feel it, almost oozing from him."



 "And you didn't think to ask the Doctor for help?"

 "Of course I did. I wanted to, really. I couldn't think of the words,

though. 'Oh, Doctor, by the way, I'm being forced to try to kill you'.

Doesn't sound very convincing does it."



 "I've heard sillier things said."



 Another pause.



 "I tried to tell Nyssa once."



 "Why didn't you?"



 "You turned up and shouted at me."



 "Oh." I think her face reddened a bit, but it could have been a trick

of the light.
 She mumbled something that might have been an apology. It gave me a

nice warm smug feeling either way.



 Dessert was a very light coconut ice cream, smooth and delicious. Tegan

got the waiter to bring us some port as well. I asked for a cigar. Tegan

told me that I was gross, and I cancelled the order.



 I'd actually gone out of my way not to offend her. She was smiling now,

and she seemed relaxed. Oddly, I'd relaxed too.
 "You're okay, you know that." I said.



 "Yes," she replied. "I know that."



 I found myself laughing. Hated myself for it.
 We wandered back outside and she stood, resting her arms on the balcony

and looking out at the lights on the boats in the bay below. I perched

myself a couple of feet along from her, and drank quietly.


 "So are we friends now?" I ventured, half afraid of her response. She

certainly seemed more relaxed and a lot... nicer than usual, but she

still had an edge to her that made me slightly wary.



 "No," she replied. "Not yet. I still don't know if I can trust you, and

I don't like the way you manipulate people to get them to like you. I

can still see through you, Turlough, and you're still a nasty piece of

work."



 She was right.



 "You asked what I was afraid of." It was a gamble, and one I was

uncertain of. I said the words quietly, half-hoping that she hadn't

heard.



 She turned to face me, saying nothing, but listening for once. 



 "All my life I've been abandoned, stuck in places where I didn't want

to be." 



 "Like that school."



 "Like that planet. I hate to feel trapped, to have no means of escape,

to know that I'm helpless."



 "And you're worried that the Doctor will leave you behind?"



 "Silly, isn't it?"



 She placed her hand over mine, in a friendly, reassuring gesture.

 "It's not silly at all. Come on."



 I followed her back into the TARDIS.



 "This doesn't mean I trust you, and doesn't mean we're friends, you

know."



 "I know."



 "It just means you're getting a second chance."



 And, almost despite myself, that made me intensely happy.