March 10, 2000
Dear Addison,
Failed my Red Cross test, really bullshit but what
else is
new? I'm glad we can be candid and open and I appreciate the
time you
spend with me "chewing " the fat.Got the gumption together
this afternoon
after this Red Cross bullshit and went over to Nielsen and explained
to
her that slides didn't do my paintings justice.I suggested that
she let
me bring some in. She looked at me as if I had 2 heads!!! She
was polite
but said she felt the time wasn't right.I decided to ask her
when will
she have a "viewing" date. Her response was cold at
best but she said
check back in June!!I left it at that!!!!was polite and thanked
her for
her time.I wasn't in the best of moods when I left.Something
was more at
work here!!A 49 year old Irishman doesn't fit in with this crowd.I
don't know what it is,but what the fuck ...on to Creiger Dane.
When I got to Creiger Dane the response was even more "cold"I
asked
Geeta if she would mind me bringing in a painting. Her reply
was polite but I
got this explanation everything up there was on hold.That they
weren't
looking at any new artist period!! So I politely said ok,see
ya on
campus some other time.
These people are in business to make money,outside
of Nielsen I don't
think alot of them can even pay their rent.I felt GOOD. I approached
these people. Gives me the courage to look elsewhere.Who knows
where that
should be. But I needn't let it worry me. Painting is like sobriety,it's
a
gift. I have come so far as a painter lately I feel if I keep
making the work
-- somewhere, with a little bit of luck and my good looks, my
work will
progress despite the Nielsens and who ever else.
Worked out at the YMCA after all this and my vision was clear
as a
bell. Despite my handicaps,financial situation etc.etc.I'm doing
great
work. 40 new works since July and the best is yet to come. I
owe nothing
to Caro or Greenberg,owe nothing to any crazy aesthetic. I keep
painting, stay sober. Celebrate the whole wonderful creating
abstract
painting or what any painting really is. I've got more for you.
Doing Charcoal
drawings on graph paper.22x17 they're great. Dreams of sculpture
or
paintings to be. But they hold up well on their own. Drawng to
me is like
keeping a "jounal." The feel of charcoal in my hand
and the magic of paper
balances the anxiety of creating new work. Paid my credit card
off last
week, got a whole household of stuff to work with. Paper,ovals
glued to
rectangles,regular canvases,for a change of pace. My partner
Joyce thinks
it great to live in a household where creative SPIRIT bring so
much to
our relationship!!!Enough for now have lots to say,but I'll leave
that
to a day real soon.Hope the family is well.Will e-mail you soon!!!Got
some stuff I need to pass by you about the real courage we all
need to
keep going!!Till next time Love as always and I mean that from
the HEART
and Joyce too.Ulick
