I'm
back! |
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After my
3 weeks [Hong Kong - China - Japan] tour, I'm finally back. Actually
I'm already back for 1 week + 4 days. I miss the tour. I hadn't
felt so relaxed and enjoyable for a while. Japan becomes my favourite
place to travel. But, all good things must end.. T_T I recalled
when my dad suggested the tour, I was so against it at first because
I hate flying. I'm like a frog trapped in a well [A fool, I was].
In the end, I enjoyed it so much that I felt I hadn't have enough.
If you've never tried it, you'd never know whether you'd like it
[whether you'd succeed].
Anyway,
when I returned, I discovered some changes in Singapore. New
taxis, new $10 note [courtesy of Andy]. Me too, no more a
student, searching for job now [miserable].
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Eternal
Sunshine of the Spotless Mind |
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"How
happy is the blameless Vestal’s lot!
The
world forgetting, by the world forgot.
Eternal
sun-shine of the spotless mind!
Each
pray’r accepted, and each wish resigned."
--
Alexander Pope’s Eloisa to Abelard |
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Crazy |

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Why
do I have to do so many stupid things just to complete one
simple task sometimes. For instance, I want to stop the lift's
door from closing, I stuck out my leg, pushed it against the
door and gave it a kick, like performing a stunt. I want to
write about this thing that I was thinking, but I just kept
writing and writing, beating around the bush until there's
no more bush left, and I haven't even touch on the point yet.
We
do lots of stupid things sometimes, I guess. Like the certainly
deaf and racialist voters of American Idol. Again and again,
they didn't voted for people who were capable. This reminds
me of Taiwan. That makes the results unimportant already.
I've already given up on them. As long as you know who's the
best, who's in who's out aren't important anymore. The American
businessman travelled all the way to Iraq to help rebuilding
their homeland, and that was how they gave him in return.
The world's crazy. Let's get crazy~ Crazy~ Crazy~
I'm
ugly, I'm fat, my hair is always in a mess. So what? I'm like
this. I want to be like that. Why do I have to care about
what you say? Can't you just shut up and enjoy watching me
being a freak, like watching a comedy? If everyone in the
world is charming, then charming won't be charming anymore.
I feel that my broadband connection is getting slower and
s-l-o-w-e-r, day by day. Could it be that I've already got
used to fast connection?
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Creepy |

I'd put
up some pictures of my niece in my Yahoo! album for my relatives
in Hong Kong and China to see. We haven't met for many years and
when they saw the pictures, most of them complained that time flies.
In their mind, before seeing the pictures, my niece was still a
baby.
Ya, time
is creeping when we're breathing, when we're dreaming, when we're
doing nothing, when we're complaining, ... In the process, we don't
feel a thing. The only time when we feel that a large chunk of time
had already flown away is when we notice changes. *suspense* Just
like the victim only discovered that he's stabbed from behind when
he felt pain. He knew that he's dying when he saw blood and felt
cold silence.
But we
won't grow and advance when time doesn't go on. *solemn solemn*
I'm going to stop this.
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AMERICANS
ARE DEAF |
After
watching today's episode of American Idol, I'm finally convinced
that a majority of Americans are deaf. The best 3 were placed in
the bottom three and 1 was sent home. I wonder what's in their mind.
So who's next?
I think
I may be over-reacting, because this type of thing always happens
in life. Most of the time, the best won't win in the competition,
and the winner might not do better than the 'losers' after winning
the competition. There are lots of real-life examples, there's no
need for me to mention. Competition is always unfair. It depends
more on your luck rather than on your capability most of the time,
I feel. And so are exams. You might understand your concepts very
well and you might be able to apply your knowledge flexibly on every
situation, but when it comes to exams, you just can't perform. Because
you're nervous, because you're unlucky, because you're sick, because
the marker is bias, because of this, because of that. These results
can't actually reflect one's capability. They have to ban exams
in future.
Come comrades!
Let's stand up and strike!

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3 Poor Teeth |
This
is a follow-up of "12 Bad Teeth". I've gone to my brother's
friend, who's a dentist, for '2nd opinion'. He did a thorough checkup
(even X-Ray) and the result was, my teeth weren't decaying. I wonder
whether the 3 teeth, that were filled the other day, were really
decayed.
My advice
to you is, always seek for 2nd opinion.

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12 Bad Teeth |
Today, not only I know that I've bad hair, my dentist told me that
about 12 of my teeth were decaying. I brush my teeth everyday, floss
almost everyday, why? Why??? Why me?! haha... It's not terminal
disease, anyway, there's still hope. But my dentist gave me another
blow further by telling me that my teeth were very weak. I'm not
sure whether he's just trying to swindle me, or whatever. But, just
want to warn you people to take care of your teeth, your hair, your
everything everyday. Otherwise, you will become like me.
I think
if I continue on like this, I'll become a toothless, bald fatso,
by the age of 22. But I don't really care. I'm not nice-looking
anyway. haha... Ya, but still, it's we've to take care of ourselves
when we can (before it's too late). God bless you, and God bless me.

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Know
Nothing |
Most of the time, when we know what we don't know, but don't know
how to capture these new things that we know, we will end up not
knowing what we know. It will be even worse if we don't even know
why we don't know what we've already known. As a result, the more
you know, the more you don't know. |  |

Ya
I know, I'm just trying to talk big.
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No Light |
Now, I feel like living
in a beam of light out of the darkness. Lights in the area around
my house went off mysteriously. I hear that there is blackout affecting
the northern and western part of Singapore now, which is where I’m
living in. I feel fortunate that my air-con is still working, and
the lights are comforting me. Imagine if you’re in an elevator
when the power goes off suddenly. No need to imagine actually. Sometimes
while we thought that we’re progressing fine, we’ve
got stuck and felt lost, don’t know what to do. I guess we
just have to wait. What else can we do?
Actually, blackout isn’t really very
bad at all. We can’t see the things near us, but we can see
things that we can’t usually. We can see more stars in the
sky. We can do things that we don’t do usually. We can take
out torches, lanterns and etc. to the field and play catching, make
noise, do lots of nonsense. We will think about our friends and
relatives more suddenly, instead of chatting online, playing games,
listening to radio and etc. No light actually can bring us closer,
isn’t it? I don’t know. Sometimes, when you can see
someone, you might feel distant from him/her. But when you don’t
see him/her, you start thinking of him/her and feel close to that
person.
I just
looked out my window and checked out the situation again. But, the
streets and houses lit up all at once suddenly. It’s very
special. Don't know how to explain, just beautiful.

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No Reason |
I
don't like making my site so solemn. But I've got feedbacks from
my friends that my site has no 'substance'. haha... They start saying they
don't understand me, don't understand all the people around them. hehe...
Come on! We don't even understand ourselves most of the time. Just
stay happy and do whatever you want as long as you don't make anyone
feel bad. It's ok. There's no reason for everything we do. We just
do it and don't even know why. Why why why? I don't even know why
myself. How to tell you? There's simply no reason why. We know that there's no reason
yet we don't believe it and still ask ourselves. What's that for?
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Already Lost~ |
I've
lost contact with many people these few years. Some of my close
friends rarely contact now, due to graduation, due to different
geographical location, due to this, due to that. Sometimes, I hope
I can see them again. Do the things we used to do, say the things
we used to say, sing the songs we used to sing.
Sometimes,
I feel not like seeing them again because things won't be the same
after all. People do grow and change. What's now may not be even
similar tomorrow. It's been a while since you last contact, how
would you know what have happened to that person, what is he/she
thinking now? Your close friend has already become a familiar stranger,
if you haven't notice.
You see
that person one day on the road, on the street, in the shopping
center, or anywhere. Wow! Hi! How are you? Then what's next? It's
seemed like so many things to say, so many things to ask inside,
but you don't know how to say it out, you don't know if it's relevant,
it's stupid, and you feel so lost in words, like you're alone in
the outer space.
In the
end, you start behaving 'friendlier' than friends should be. On
the other hand, you can feel closer to other long-lost friends whom
you weren't so close to. You feel that you can chat more, do more,
laugh more, behave more naturally.
It may
also because you were once close before, you will be expecting more.
Yet, you can't get back that feeling that you wanted (or you used
to feel) immediately all at once. The person may not have changed,
but situation had; the world changes everyday. The feeling is already
different.
Sometimes,
it's better not knowing how that person is now, and just remember
that person as the person you always knew until you die. Isn't it
so? An ending makes things more beautiful, pitiful though.

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Hey Hay! |
hey!
i've uploaded some photos, though not very new ones. the 2 primary
school group photos taken during last gathering look exceptionally
horrifying. sorry, not the photo, it's me who look exceptionally
like a freak + nerd + fatso [well, ya i know i'm always fat]. today
is the first time i see these photos actually. and my hair looks
like a bale of hay [like what that freaky woman in the dove
shampoo advertisement, who had to confess to the audience that
she actually liked to play with her hair so much that she just couldn't
help it, said]. actually it's worse than that, i know. but i hate styling. so just let it
be, let it be, let it be. i know i'm a freaky, nerdy fatso. so what?
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