Remember this is not one of my jokes... and unfortunately I don't have a reference
to who it has been written by.
As was pointed out by one of my friends, this joke was obviously written by a male... see if you can work out why? ;)
Count Dracula
Dracula was killed one day and up he went to the Pearly Gates to meet God.
God refused to let Dracula in because of all the sins that he done going
around sucking blood and killing.
"I'll give you a chance to redeem your sins", said God. "I'll send you
back to earth, BUT not in a human form. You can only be reincarnated into
any other living things of your choice. So, what would you like to be?"
Still unrepentant, Dracula said, "OK, I want to become a LIVING THING WITH
WINGS & SUCKS BLOOD, heh ..heh.. heh.. ."
"So be it", said God and He turned Dracula into a VAMPIRE BAT.
So back to earth he went, flying around sucking blood of animals until one
day when he got killed by a farmer. So up he went again to meet God,
feeling a little bit sheepish.
"I'll give you another chance", said God. "I'll send you back again BUT
not as a human form or bat. What will it be this time?" Still adamant,
Dracula said,"I'll still want to be a LIVING THING WITH WINGS & SUCKS
BLOOD!" God thought for a while and then said,"OK, if that's what you
want", and turned Dracula into a MOSQUITO.
So back to earth again he went, flying around & sucking blood until one
day, SPLAT! he was squashed by his victim. So up he went again to meet
God, feeling stupid.
"I'll give you one last chance to redeem yourself. But, this time you
cannot become a living thing. You can only be turned into a NON-LIVING
THING of your choice. So what will it be?" asked God.
Still stubborn, Dracula said,"Okayyyy...then turn me into a NON-LIVING
THING WITH WINGS & SUCKS BLOOD!! heh... heh... heh.. ."
"No problem," said God and He turned Dracula into a NON-LIVING THING WITH
WINGS & SUCKS BLOOD.
Dracula became a WHISPER TAMPON.
Have you worked it out yet? If not, maybe you
want to ask my friend, Julie?
Go back to my jokes' page Go back to my page Go back to the main homepage
Go back to my jokes' page
Go back to my page
Go back to the main homepage