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The next day was one of the most painful of Ash's life. Mirnessa and her children woke him the minute they got back, and he had only slept two hours. He literally fell out of bed, adding a new set of bruises to his side. He stumbled after them to their rooms, receiving a not so gentle cuff from Tristan for not moving fast enough. Retrieving all their worn ball clothes he took them to go and wash them, but not till he had received orders that breakfast was to be ready by noon. He sighed, and got to work…moving slower than usual from lack of sleep. Then they complained at three o'clock when they got downstairs and their breakfast was cold. Ash got booted outside to clean up the yard. It was nearly eleven when he was allowed in again. He felt like a dog, tired, abandoned, abused. And it wasn't helping that his mind dwelled on thoughts of his prince. His prince! Who was he kidding? He attempted to think of something else. Reina's cryptic comment of understanding the previous night…but it all brought his mind back to Prince Rilien. That slightly mussed brown hair, those blue eye…Ash really could have swooned. As it was he almost cried. Too much, too fast, never again. He finally fell asleep, the tears almost painful behind his eyes.
It was nearly a week later when Mirnessa sent Ash off into one of the nastier sides of town to get some of the drugs and creams she depended on for her looks. It had been raining for the past three days and had hardly stopped then, but Ash went nonetheless. Plodding through muddy street after muddy street, merely brushing the dirt from his eyes each time a passing carriage soaked him with mud. He was smeared with the stuff when he finally reached his destination, got the required items and started to head back. He was tired and his legs ache to the point where he thought he would fall down. Suddenly he saw a flash of gold out of the corner of his eye. He turned and jumped a foot. It was a royal carriage, and prince Rilien was staring right at him. He stood there for a minute, in total shock, before turning and sprinting around a corner, only to slip and fall in a puddle of mud.
Prince Rilien was in shock. That creature, at once so obviously, yet androgynously male looked remarkably like the intelligent woman he had talked to at the ball. Those eyes were surely unmistakable; yet…Ashra had been a woman, and the muddy, violet-eyed creature had been a man…a boy rather, just about his age. He sprung out of the carriage on pure impulse, following the fleeing figure just in time to see it slip and fall in the mud.
'Oh! Oh, shit!' Ash's ankle hurt, not sprained, but slightly twisted he knew. Suddenly there were strong hands pulling him out of the mud. He looked up; thinking to thank his rescuer, only to find himself mesmerized by a pair of deep blue eyes. He eventually realized he was staring and jerked himself away.
"Thank you, your highness."
Rilien reached out a hand, smitten with the lithe, if messy body before him. "Ashra?"
"Ashril, your highness." Ash murmured.
"You…you're a guy?"
Ash nodded a bit shakily, he wanted to leave…at least part of him did. The other part wanted to fling himself into the prince's arms, and never leave. But the latter was impossible and a hand clamped onto his arm prevented the former.
"My…my god." The prince breathed, turning Ash to face him. "You're beautiful."
The tears behind Ash's eyes threatened to break through again.
"Your highness, please. I have to go."
"Why?" Rilien's voice was misleadingly innocent. "I've…I've been trying to find you. Why did you leave like that?" He reached out and touched Ash's face. "…Why didn't you tell me you were a guy?"
"I was a servant pretending at nobility, your highness. You could've had me killed." 'Why…why can't I lie to him?'
"Killed?" Rilien looked shocked. "No. Never killed. I might have jumped you maybe, but not killed."
"…Jumped?"
"Yes," Rilien breathed, staring unabashedly at Ash. "Have you any idea at all just how gorgeous you are? My god…and I thought you were a pretty woman…but as a man…you…you're breath taking."
"Your highness…please, don't."
"Don't what?" Rilien had his hands on Ash's upper arms now. "Don't look at you? Don't say that? What?" His eyes grew a bit wild. "What has changed? You trusted me. Didn't you? What has changed?" Suddenly he lunged forward, kissing Ash fiercely. Lapping, biting at the other young man's lips. Ash could not help but give in. He was burning…the prince…his prince was kissing him. Just like he had always dreamt. It was perfect, too perfect he realized suddenly. He pulled away.
"Your highness!"
"Would you stop calling me that!" Rilien demanded. "I have a name."
"I'm getting your clothes dirty." Ash protested.
"I have more. Come back to the palace with me." The warm hands had moved from his arms to stroke his dirt-covered cheeks. "I want to get you cleaned up."
Ash pulled away yet again. "I…I can't! My stepmother…I've been gone too long already! I'll be in even more trouble if I get back even later."
"Then don't go back."
"Huh?" Ash stared at the prince as if the man were crazy. The light in the blue eyes told him that crazy was probably just about right.
"Marry me." Rilien breathed."
Ash was thrilled…yet his common sense quashed the hope quite effectively. "Your father, your highness…besides, we hardly know each other."
"That can be fixed." Rilien was unstoppable. "Please. At least for a little while, I want to get you cleaned up. I promise I won't let your stepmother hurt you, no matter what happens."
Ash couldn't help himself. He knew it made no practical sense whatsoever, but for once he didn't care. He let Rilien draw him back into his arms. His prince was here and everything would be all right, it had to be.
"You're beautiful." Rilien breathed into his ear. "Gods above you're beautiful." He stared dreamily into the slanted violet eyes, ecstatic when Ash raised slender arms to wrap them around his neck. There was a slight note of pleading in those eyes now. 'Keep me safe. Don't let me go. Please, don't let me go…don't make me go back there…'
"I promise baby," Rilien whispered. "Trust me, I promise."
"How do you know?" Ash asked.
"You have very expressive eyes." Rilien murmured, lifting Ash into his arms. "Come on, I want to get you cleaned up." They kissed again, this time meeting each other half way, Ash's hands burying themselves in the prince's messy hair. In a matter of seconds Ash found himself being carried back to the prince's carriage, and situated comfortably inside it, a.k.a. still in Rilien's arms. He snuggled back against the broad chest, sighing happily. He felt so warm, like a slow flame from the inside out, yet a lick of cold spread through him. This was too good. It couldn't last. Once again he choked back the tears threatening to slide down his cheeks, thankful Rilien couldn't see his face, unaware that the prince could feel his body tense, and had a pretty good guess as to why.
"Baby? What's wrong?"
"N-nothing." The word stumbled awkwardly off Ash's tangled tongue.
Rilien sighed, stroking Ash's cheek. "Really, what's wrong? Please?"
"I-this- this can't last." Ash was nearer to tears than he had been yet.
"Why not?"
"Whaddya mean why not?" Ash's diction began to fail as tears clogged his throat. "I'm a servant, you're a prince…that's reason enough, not to mention I'm a guy."
"Didn't I tell you I wasn't going to let anything happen to you?" Rilien whispered. Ash nodded. "I meant it, truly." He turned Ash to face him, cupping his face. "Please believe me. Please."
"I want to," Ash choked. "I-but-you're perfect."
"I'm not," Rilien denied. "But if I was, what does that have to do with it?"
"I'm never this lucky."
"So you think something's going to go wrong? Ash, things do work out sometimes."
"Not for me."
"You know what your problem is?" Rilien mused. Ash shook his head. "You're too insecure." He smiled softly. "I promise though, if there is any way I can make this work out, I will. I swear."
Ash couldn't really help it; a few tears began to trickle down his dirty face. The first few were soon followed by torrents more. Rilien pulled Ash tightly into his arms, stroking his back.
"Ssshhh, ssshh baby. I promise; everything'll turn out perfect. I won't let it happen any other way. I promise." Somewhere in here they had reached the palace. Rilien lifted Ash once again and carried him out of the carriage, setting him down in front of the steps and shooting him a rather sheepish grin.
"I'm not that strong." He explained, taking Ash's hand and leading him into the palace. It was the second time Ash had been inside, but still the splendor left him breathless. He sighed, following close behind Rilien.
"They would love this." Ash murmured taking in the lavish gold work and the gems set in the picture frames.
"Who?"
"The two girls I told you about."
"Oh." Rilien threw open a door and ushered Ash into a lavish, silk decorated room.
"Wow!"
"You like it?" Rilien asked, almost hesitant.
"Decadent." Ash breathed. "But gorgeous…I love it."
"So you'll stay?"
"With you?"
"Where else?"
Ash blushed. "I…I…"
Rilien smiled, turning to place a finger over Ash's slim mouth then he stroked a hand down the muddy cheek.
"Will you let me get you cleaned up?" He asked. Watching with delight as Ash's cheeks reddened further and the silver haired boy nodded. "Gods you're beautiful." He leaned so his forehead touched Ash's, running his hands through the tangled hair.
"I-I'm getting you muddy." Ash stuttered, suddenly uncomfortable with the close scrutiny.
"I don't care." Rilien grinned at him. "I'm so smitten with you it's sad."
"Rilien…"
"Shush." The prince led him off to the side and into and equally lavish bathroom.
"Is everything this grand?" Ash inquired.
"Worse," Rilien sighed. "I got the plainest room." He bent and began fiddling with taps to get water running into the huge tub. When the temperature was to his liking he turned back to Ash.
"Ashril…" The prince hesitated when he saw Ash. The other boy had his head down, facing away from Rilien.
"I shouldn't be here. I…" He muttered. Rilien knelt in front of him.
"You should be here." He murmured. "I want you here…with me." He stood resting one hand on Ash's face; he couldn't get enough of touching the other boy. He… "I…I want you…goddamnit I think I might love you."
"I…I…" Ash was caught off base. 'Too much like a dream. Can't be real…can't, but I want it to!'
"Shush." Rilien said, his voice infinitely gentle. "You can't very well bathe in your clothes."
"Huh?" Ash's pale skin turned a bright crimson as his brain processed the abrupt subject change. Rilien chuckled, and wrapped Ash tightly in his arms.
"Do I have to do it for you?" He asked, sliding his hands under Ash's shirt. Ash jumped back a bit, pulling away.
"I-I can manage."
Rilien chuckled. "I'm sure you can. May I help you?"
"I…"
Rilien leaned forward and his soft breaths gusted into Ash's ear. "Please?"
With a sigh Ash surrendered himself into the prince's arms, basking in the warmth of the gentle hands lifting his torn and dirty shirt from his chest.
"So beautiful." The prince breathed, stroking his hand down the pale chest. It stopped at the darkening bruises on his side. "How…"
"I fell out of bed."
Rilien shook his head, his fingers ghosting over another bruise. "That looks like a fist mark."
Ash curled tightly in on himself, fear of getting pushed away burning in him. "Please, just…don't ask." 'I'm not good enough for you. I should leave. I…'
"Love," Rilien whispered. "I won't ask. Please, come back." He knew. He could feel Ash drawing away from him, mentally as well as physically. He could almost hear the litany in the other boy's head. "Ash, please." He reached out to lift that pale face to look at his; the violet eyes were leaking tears yet again. He drew Ash carefully into his arms. "Please baby, I don't care about that. I'll kill whoever did it to you but…it doesn't make you less beautiful. Please Ash let me help you forget. Will you let me do that? Please?"
Ash nodded, burying his head in Rilien's shoulder. "I'm sorry," he sobbed.
"No, no," The prince murmured, stroking his back. "You have nothing to be sorry for." He lifted Ash's head, kissing him first softly, and then harder and the boy's sweet taste entranced him once again. "Gods above, I love you." He breathed when they broke the kiss.
"I…"Ash stumbled over the words, pushing them past the block in his throat. "I love you too."
"And I am lucky," Rilien breathed. 'Maybe, just maybe, for once, everything would work out alright.' The hope was obvious in Ash's eyes, so obvious that Rilien laughed as he proceeded to strip Ash of the rest of his clothes (consisting of pants and boots) and help him into the large, sunken tub. He knelt on the edge, reaching for shampoo.
"Why exactly did you come to the Ball as a girl?" He asked, beginning to lather the shampoo into Ash's hair. Ash sighed and leaned back into those gentle hands.
"I stand out to much as a guy." He explained. "At least, that's what Cleo and Reina told me."
"You certainly do," Rilien agreed. "Who are Cleo and Reina?"
Ash went white. The girls…they were thieves. What would Rilien do if he found out? His duty to his father might compel him to turn them in.
"I won't tell my father anything you tell me," Rilien murmured, as if reading Ash's mind.
"They-They're the girls I told you about. The ones who got me the dress, the ones I saw the other day."
"Cleo and Reina…" Rilien searched his mind. "God, those names sound familiar." He snapped his fingers. "Those two girls that went missing! Nobel's daughters! They were kidnapped…or something."
Ash shook his head. "I don't think they were my Cleo and Reina…they've always been street girls."
"Of course it can't be them," Rilien mused. "That was hundreds of years ago…a hundred at least." He shook his head to clear it. "Oh well. Lean back in the water." He commanded. Ash did and he began to rinse out the suds. Ash stared up at Rilien when the prince let him back up blushing. "What?" Rilien asked.
"I…" Ash sighed, reaching up to brush Rilien's cheek with a wet hand. "My prince…?" He murmured, still somewhat unsure.
"No," Rilien sighed. "Not a prince at all. A man, that's all. Just Rilien."
"You don't like being a prince?" Ash queried.
"Not much." Then Rilien smiled. "Of course, in the long run, if it gets me you…" He chuckled, as Ash's blush deepened further.
"No," Ash smiled gently at Rilien. "You got me you, not you're being a prince." He looked away from those blue eyes, unable to bear the close scrutiny. His hand left Rilien's face and the prince shuddered at the loss.
"May…may I join you?" He asked. Ash looked up at him, eyes wide. "Please," he added, terrified that too sharp a move would scare Ash away. His eyes lit up when Ash nodded carefully and he stood to start removing his own clothes.
Ash tried not to look as Rilien stripped, but something about it was too entrancing. He wanted to know what that body that felt so comfortable against his own looked like. True he could guess a bit, the result of some rather guilty fantasizing in his bed after everyone else was asleep, but something about actually seeing was so fundamentally different. The prince was…was perfect. Not so skinny, like so many nobles, but muscular and tanned, the result of stolen time out of doors. Then again, he wasn't a muscle bound hulk either, the kind you're afraid will hurt you if they merely tap your shoulder, he was just…perfect. Ash's perfect that is. Unscarred, seemingly untouched, though how that was possible…Ash couldn't understand, surely such a magnificent being would have people hanging all over him. Then Rilien knelt in the water next to him and all thought rushed away in a tide of embarrassment. His callused hand came up to stroke Ash's reddened cheek. Callused…Ash understood. The prince thought too much like a commoner, acted like one, even if he looked anything but common. Royalty did not approve of that, at least, not from what Ash had seen and heard.
"Ash…" Rilien whispered. Ash looked at him, something of a mistake…a very handsome, very strong, very naked prince was kneeling next to him, and he reacted. Nonetheless, he nearly jumped a foot when Rilien touched a bruise on his shoulder.
"You bruise easily?" The prince asked. Ash nodded. The jumped slightly again as Rilien drew him back against his chest. "I won't ever let it happen again."
"Promise?" Ash asked wearily. He was tired of doubting. All he wanted to do was stay there in the prince's arms and let Rilien take care of every thing.
"I promise." Rilien picked up the soap and began to wash what was left of the mud off of Ash's body. Ash squirmed a bit at the first touch, but eventually relaxed into Rilien's care. The prince could have done anything; Ash was so far past caring at that point. He was warm, he was comfortable, and what was more, he trusted Rilien. Trusted to prince not to hurt him. With a sigh he let his head fall back onto Rilien's shoulder and within moments he was asleep.
Rilien chuckled slightly as Ash's breathing evened out and the violet eyes slid shut, long lashes laying flush against pale cheeks. His love obviously needed the sleep, and badly. Rilien wondered what the boy's life was like. Probably not good, considering the bruises, and Ash's jumpy reactions. A small growl left the prince's throat. If he ever found the person who did those things to his Ash…His thought trailed off as he realized, somewhat belatedly, that he had Ash's naked body curled trustingly against his. He had been too caught up in thoughts of vengeance to really notice before. When he had been stripping Ash he had been trying not to look, knowing that any show of obvious lust might scare him off permanently. Now he did notice, and took his good time looking, feeling a bit guilty in taking advantage of the beauty's unconscious state. Ash was…beautiful. Delicate, fine boned, pale…His long, silvery hair was spread out behind him in the water, his slim face finally relaxed and peaceful, despite the gray tear streaks. Ash really could have been one of the Faeries. Rilien hesitantly ran his thumb over those full lips, smiling when Ash sighed in his sleep at the gentle touch. His hand ghosted over the slim neck, proclaimed collarbones and down the smooth chest. There was a whisper of muscle under the silky skin, leading Rilien to wonder whether Ash was stuck doing hard labor at home. 'But wouldn't he be less scrawny then?' his mind argued. Rilien shook his head absently. Ash was obviously underfed something the prince could easily rectify. He pulled his hand off of Ash, not wanting to be tempted to go further down. 'Do that when he's awake.' He told himself, before lifting Ash gently out of the tub, letting his eyes do the rest of the travelling. Long legs, sharp hips…he looked, but made his mind stop analyzing. Something he had learned long ago when he father started making him spar with knights. Knights that he thought were decently attractive, though were nothing compared to Ash. But he had nonetheless taught himself several tricks for keeping arousal a bay. As much as he hated being a prince the last thing he needed was to get disowned, which is what would have happened had his father found out.
Rilien pulled himself out of his thoughts and carried Ash over to the bed setting him on it after drying both of them off. The boy was so deeply asleep that he barely even twitched throughout all of it. Finally Rilien crawled into bed beside him and pulled up the covers, settling in to watch his beloved while he slept.
Ash awoke to the unfamiliar sense of comfort and warmth, and of a body pressed close against his own. His violet eyes fluttered open and met the warm blue eyes staring down at him.
"Good morning." Rilien said happily. Ash merely sighed, and snuggled further into the prince's arms. Then a thought struck him.
"Rilien?"
"Yes, love?"
"How…how long did-"
"You slept a good twelve hours," Rilien told him.
"Twelve--" Ash shot upright. "I-I've gotta get home, my step mother-"
"I thought you were staying with me." Rilien looked a bit hurt. "Unless you want to go home." The strong blue eyes seemed to waver a bit at this thought.
"I don't want to…"
"Then don't. Stay. Please?"
Ash nodded, curling back down into bed. "Did you watch me all this time?"
Rilien grinned. "I wish. I fell asleep too, eventually."
"Oh." Ash drew a finger down the prince's chest, watching how pale his near white skin looked against Rilien's golden-brown.
"Are you hungry?" Rilien asked. Ash's head shot up, his eyes wide.
"Oh, yes please."
"Give me a second then." Rilien climbed out of bed. It was only then that Ash realized the prince was fully naked. He found himself guiltily reveling in his view before a royal blue robe cut it off. Rilien turned back to him and bent to kiss his temple. "I'll be back in a minute, I need to find someone I can trust." With that he left, leaving Ash lying on the bed.
Left alone Ash's fears began to creep back into his mind. First and foremost…what if someone were to come in and find him. He wasn't supposed to be there, he was sure of that. Secondly…. Rilien. He wanted so badly to trust the prince, to let him take care of everything. But he wasn't sure. They were young. Rilien had said he loved him, but how did he know? Ash knew he was falling in love. He had been without it for so long that he recognized the sensation he had been missing. He wanted it to be love on both sides, so that everything could work out, forever. But he was highly aware that it might just be lust. He knew he could inspire that, Tristan had taken him a few times, when he hadn't had any new 'girls' to play with. It terrified him. Finally, he was afraid of returning home. He knew Rilien had said he wouldn't have to, but what if he did? Would Mirnessa even let him live? He knew he would at least get the beating of his life, and that scared him. He had had a small taste of gentleness now; he didn't want to be hurt again. Rilien had promised him, and he wanted to trust the prince, but that just brought him back to the second worry. His mind was going round in circles so fast that he jumped nearly a foot when Rilien reentered the room.
"Ash?" Rilien asked, seeing the look of pure terror on his love's face. Ash seemed to relax a bit.
"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I wasn't sure it was you."
"It's me." Rilien slipped off the robe and climbed back into bed. He wanted to reach out to pull Ash into his arms, but was a little worried that Ash would pull away. So he merely held out his arms to the other boy, overjoyed when Ash immediately climbed into them.
"How are you feeling?" He asked, looking down at Ash's face and trying to control the desire to kiss all coherent thought out of his bedmate.
"I'm ok." Ash sighed, burrowing further into the embrace. Rilien was so warm… "Thank you."
"Huh?"
"For being so nice…"
"Beloved-"
"Shush," Ash smiled. "Is the food coming?"
Rilien nodded, then leaned in to kiss Ash. Very gently and carefully despite his body's urging. It was Ash with opened up the kiss, slipping his tongue into Rilien's mouth. Rilien moaned. It wasn't like he had done this a million times himself…. He realized he was clutching Ash a bit harder than was necessary and eased up on his grip a bit. Ash had practically crawled into his lap now, skin flush against skin.
"Please," Ash whispered, breaking the kiss. "Please be telling the truth…" There were tears attempting to drip out of those beautiful eyes.
"Telling the…" Rilien was confused for about a second, his brain still a bit woozy from the kiss, then he smiled. "I mean it, Ash. I love you."
"How do you know?"
"Because I never want to let you go, and I can be a possessive bastard, but everyone else I can manage to let go."
"Everyone…else."
Rilien's eyes fell. "I gave up my father's love a long time ago, Ash. He…he wanted a princely son, not me. My mother is dead, and I accept that now. I…there was one other lover…he had to leave, and I let him. I had known I would have to but you…I'm never letting you go. Besides," Rilien nuzzled aside the long silver hair to kiss Ash's ear. "If this was just lust don't you think I would have done something by now, rather than spending all my time convincing you to stay?"
Ash nodded slowly. He hadn't thought of that. He buried his face in Rilien's neck, letting his tongue trace patterns on the sweet skin. A faint moan escaped Rilien's throat as he pulled Ash up to kiss him again.
"Baby…"
The door creaked open and Ash snapped away from Rilien, but Rilien held him close.
"It's ok," he assured Ash. "He's the one I can trust." Rilien nodded to the middle aged man in a cook's uniform. He was carrying a tray heaped with food. "Thank you, Blain."
The man nodded and left, winking quickly at the two boys before he shut the door.
"Blain was kind of a…nanny to me." Rilien explained. "Still is in some ways. He's the only person in the palace that knows my preferences. You're lucky, he's the head cook." Rilien pushed the tray towards Ash. "Eat."
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