--Free Britney--
Britney Spears is quickly becoming more famous that Christ. From billboards to banner ads, her recognizable mug is hard to miss. Who would have thought that such an attractive person would become someone that so many would learn to love to hate. Maybe its just me, but the fat, ugly people who hate on Spears should try to emulate her physical beauty instead of condemn it. People are preaching beauty is on the inside and that character is more important that cup size are the people who dismiss Spears as a slut, not knowing anything of her sex life, but rather simly assuming. What Irony. Sure shes made some mistakes, 'Oops, I did it again', 'Britney's Dance Revolution', PEPSI, but that only adds to her foolish little girl image. In order to be old and wise, you must first be young and stupid. So to all you bandwagon haters, after you've gotten to know her personally, then you can make a judgement call and decide whether or not 'Britney Sux'. Until then, go fuck youself.

--Well, that was quick--
So, I've spent the last few years of my life not doing as I'm told. Contrary to popular belief, I did not do so in defiance. I did so because the experience of school got old and I need variety. I can only do so much if given nothing. I tried to keep it as real as possible but I was only met with disciplinary action. I've been told junior year is the most important of all. Well, I blew it. I probably won't pass because I've been too damn busy tryin to find meaning in an otherwise meaningless life. So, I guess I might as well accept my situation which I have created for myself. It's time to face the music, my life from now on will always be less that it can be and I have already ruined what was possible. I will be deemed useless by sociey and banished to the depths of lower middle class. I have finished my life at the young age of 17. Talk about depression!

--Now, that's what I call thinkin--
So I was thinkin about this sytem of society I'm forced into and about how there's no escape. I've learned to accept that and just shut up and take it like a scared little girl, surviving only by looking for humor and beauty in everything. In doing so, I've realized it is the most ingenious plan ever. The people at the top with the decision making powers are mindless clones, blind to the existance of this virtual prison They will never change. The people with enough mind-power to realize what's goin on will never get high enough to change or destroy it. They can never change. Although I am screwed by it for the rest of my life, I must admit, "That thar's sum gud thoinkin!"

--Think outside the box--
It's been a while since I've last talked about the whole woman thing. That quick overview that's at the bottom of this page was fun to do. Allow me to continue.
"Wanna go out with me, Heather?"
"Sure thing"
"I'm so happy"
"So am I. I love you"
"I love you, too"
"I'm dumping you."
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I still like you."
"Ok, let's go out"
"yah!"
"i'm dumping you, again. No, I'm not gonna tell you why"
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I still like you. I'm a whipped a little girl."
"Ok, let's go out"
"YES!"
"i'm dumping you. Soon you'll find out its for your trusted friend."
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I sti-- this is stupid."
"Chevelle, wanna go out?"
"No, were friends, I like this shumck who just wants sex. He's no where near as kewl as you."
"...oh"
What a drag. Takes a few days off from the dating game and goes to the coffee shop as usual. Poof - a solution. Along comes this new girly. Better than the rest combined plus 2 to the power of 12.3
"I like you more than them."
"I like you back, dork."
"It's about damn time"

And thats about where I am now. I'm ridin this one to the end. No early stops for me. The best part, I'm finally done with settling for whatever's around, now I've got the best of the best to chill with.

--All for nothing?--
So I understand somethings, and I know how to interact with most people. I think I'm more advanced than most people when it comes to the understanding of things. All I ask is that I'm given time to live life and experience all I can. I've promised to stay out of trouble as long as I can be out and about. But are my prayers answered. Nope. No matter what I'm doing, I hafta be in my house by 11PM. So, whats a guy to do? I'll tell you what a guy is to do. Make the most of the time his nazi parents do allow him. Its spring break in Boring Hellhole, PA and I'm living it up. Who cares that there's nothing to do in the dry town, I'm making things to do. Between my girl and damn moving, I'm busy.And thats not even adding all the other stuff that I do on the not spring break days. There's not too much that's gettin me down. Life is good.

--100% Life--
Without light, there is no dark. When I experience something, I don't put a label of good or bad on it. It's both, or maybe its neither. Everyone out there who says pain is bad and pleasure is good, no matter what, need to open their eyes and stop being led by the shepard of society. Just take is as it is. That way, when you get punched in the eye, it won't be bad. You could even make it good. Imagine the power. If one was so inclined, one could create any experience as a good one, therefor having no bad experiences in ones life. But be warned, without light, there is no dark.

--Now, I see--
I'm so glad that all the girls that I've been goin after have said no and shot me out of the sky. I met such a great chick a few weeks ago. Such a breath of fresh air to the scum that I'm used to being around all day at Wyo High. I'm free just to hang with her, and thank god. Because if I had settled for what was around at the time, I'd be stuck in some dead end relationship with a mindless clone of a girlfriend. I used to be bummed out that 'she' didn't say yes but now I see, it all works out in the end.

--Just this much closer to infinity--
Today, I was presented with an opportunity. Someone accused me of something I did not do. Instead of doing what was natural, I played it cool. I kept a low profile, making jokes about everything and not truely defending myself. This person insulted me and I went with it. It's not that I didn't care about what they thought, my old way of dealing with things just didn't always work. So, I tried a fresh tactic. I kept my cool and in no less than 2 min's this person was apologizing for yelling at me. This got me thinking. Maybe I can do whatever I want, kinda like God. Then I started thinking how much fun it would be to be God, what with unlimited power and all. I am shifting my life into a path of higher learning. I can totally handle power. So, if I get some, I wont abuse it, I'll use it for the greater good of humanity. I think I'm on to something , now a test, a test...

--No more pity parties--
From time to time, everyone gets depressed, its healthy to do so. However, there's a time and a place for feeling sorry for yourself (like a webpage, nyuk nyuk) And after venting, you feel better, or should. I hereby declare it un-cool to be depressed around people for extended periods of time. If you're depressed, no problem. But, don't run around telling everyone that they dont know pain because you in dire need for attention. I vow to be a happier fellow from this day fourth. Lately, I've been letting everything get to me which is not my style, who knows what I was thinking. So, I appologize for being so boring. And to thoes of you living in upper class suburbia who think you have it rough because your having trouble finding satisfaction in anything, keep in mind, you could be starving to death in some third world hell hole. Stop making your problems bigger than they in an attempt to fill the void of your life. Don't Worry, Be Happy.

--Where am I?--
I have never felt so alone. My weekend, which was packed with fun and games and laughing, has just been smashed into solitary confinment. confinment, something about that doesnt sound right. Anyway, I just got a warning notice in the mail and was grounded. My mom then went on a rampage telling me what I was supposedly thinkin. Somethin along the line of me being a rebellious teen, which I am, but only to a certain extent. She said I get bad grades because I'm trying to prove a point, which is not true. I get bad grades because I have no motivation. And now, I have even less. When that report card comes and the grades are less than perfect, she is going to sell my car. If I get good grades, she will see that that technique will have worked and she will use everything I own as leverage, if I get bad grades I lose the car anyway. I have just realized that I am truly unhappy. I find that the safest thing to do is keep any emotions or feelings bottled up, for the most part. I'm afraid to let them out, theres way too much in there. I'll keep goin on with a smile on my face but I am unhappy. I want to leave.

--Society's Definition of Success--
Without failure, there can be no success. I still think that crap exists and people just tag it as good or bad. It exists as neither, or maybe both. Anyway, I was hit int he face the fact that some of the people I have been hanging around with are exactly what I don't wanna become. Example: Me and a friend were talking and I said, what would the bad part of moving to some tropical island, becoming a fisherman and living in a grass hut with only naturally eternal beauty surrounding me. She said, "nothing, as long as you dont mind being a failure" WTF?! She has been raised to belive that success is the same for everyone and it consists of 3 things. Money, a wife if you're male and a husband of you're female, and kids. Me living in a mortal heaven on some tropical island with no social crap clogging my mind was a failure to her. I can only think of one thing to say, I am quite dissapointed.

---Girls & Stuff---
I think of myself as a normal kinda dude. I'm a 17-year-old guy who lives in Middle America, my rents are still together, I drive a Honda. Sadly, I'm single. Single, lets talk about this. I've had a few girls in the past. One of my personal favorites was a girl you old school viewers are well aware of. We all know the story. But here's the quick and simple version.

"Wanna go out with me, Heather?"
"Sure thing"
"I'm so happy"
"So am I. I love you"
"I love you, too"
"I'm dumping you."
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I still like you."
"Ok, let's go out"
"yah!"
"i'm dumping you, again. No, I'm not gonna tell you why"
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I still like you. I'm a whipped a little girl."
"Ok, let's go out"
"YES!"
"i'm dumping you. Soon you'll find out its for your trusted friend."
"shit"
--at a l8r date-
"Heather, I sti-- this is stupid."
"Chevelle, wanna go out?"
"No, were friends, I like this shumck who just wants sex. He's no where near as kewl as you."
"...oh"
That's about where I am now. I don't date people just for the image of being not single. I want this kinda girl. Cake rocks. I highly recommend all of their albums but Motorcade of Generosity.

---School---
My outlook of life? I think we, as humans, are here to experience. Not to get a lot of money, or waste time doing someone's busy work for 7hrs a day, or create Gods to worship, but to experience. If your experience includes all of that crap, then go for it. There's too much to experience in the world to waste 12+ years doing homework and all that. Don't get me wrong. I'm not an idiot. Shut your mouth, here I'll prove it. I'll get all 'A's this semester even though intelligence is in no way measured by our current public schooling tests/grading system. School simply measures your ability to operate mindlessly for a good part of your life, and in today's society, this is a very handy skill, one that I don't possess. For some strange reason, I hafta question everything.
Teacher: "Do this paper"
Zach: "Why?"
Teacher: "How the hell am I supposed to know, I'm a public school teacher, not a gamer." (tee hee hee). Here's what they teach us: Don't as questions and you'll go straight to the top. The ironic thing is, you must question the system to understand this lesson.

---Sub-cultures---
I want to be a part of a sub-culture. At one point I was a gamer. Back when gaming wasn't glorious. Now, everyone asks gamers "Should I get XBOX or PS2". These are the types of people who judge games by the ads in gaming mags, little twerps. Now, I'm looking for a new place to be. Graffiti would be badass. Graffiti is art. But graffiti as an act of vandalism is a crime. I want Sega back.

---Death---
Every man dies, not every man truly lives. If you're one of thoes people who thing that I'm gonna go shoot up my school in my underwear or hate on everyone wearing a white t-shirt, this section isn't for you. Some people wanna die painlessly in their sleep. Me? I want the most painful agonizing death possible. I want people to cringe when they hear how I died. Something like drowning in hot sand or being tied in a bad of hungry red ants and left in there to be eaten alive over the course of 10 years. I want to want to die when I'm dying.

---My History Teacher---
What a loser! This dork singles out the kids who don't to their homework and tries to embarass and humiliate them. He tries harder at this than he does teaching, which is his meaning in my life. This would be fine if we could do the same back, but nooo. This hypocritical bitch ass thinks students exist to serve him. If he was the sun god or somethin, I could see wheres he's comin from, but he's just some tool of the system who found a teaching degree in the gutter on his way home from the strip club. I agreed to do his pointless busy work for one semester and he has the nerve to take my paper when I'm talking just like every one else in the class and give me detention!? Who the hell does he think he is? After class he'll call me and others to his desk and mumble something about 'bull shit' and 'dicks'. I guess he thinks if he swears like 'us kids', we'll want to stop having fun and do whatever he tells us. He's lucky I didn't throw away my future and beat the tar out of this freak. Ahhh, I feel much better.