EX-NEWMAN NEWS PROFILES - No. 2 - - TOM CAHILL

Tom Cahill photo

  • Name: Thomas Francis Cahill
  • CNC Status: Part-time member of staff; resident of St. Josephs
  • Diocese: Lancaster
  • Lives: Life on the edge (of Fulwood), with designer cobbled streets.
  • Claims to fame: His dad played football for Newcastle, and he has won the Birley Arms pub quiz twice. He's also a better snooker player than Stephen Hendry.
  • Appearance: Timotei Advert model
  • Car: Did have a Mercedes, but alas, no more.
  • Popularity: Indeed, and lots of it. Tom is especially popular with a good number of female students (mentioning no names!), and also with the police, who he has visited several times. Sometimes they even picked him up in one of their vans. Handy now since he no longer has his Mercedes.
  • Talents: Competent smoker and drinker, and a superb footballer (20 years ago!). Not a bad teacher either.
  • Teacher? Yes, a couple of hours a week usually. Should have been a priest really - all that smoking and drinking, trained at junior seminary and is unbelievably pious.
  • Pious? Oh, yes. Daily Mass, a few decades, that sort of thing. He's a religious studies teacher, you know. He's also a huge fan of the Holy Father, and once nearly joined Opus Dei.
  • Not to be confused with: John Major, Gustavo Guttierrez, Prince Andrew, "Kairl Merx", Tinky Winky, Fr. Mike, Michael Portillo or Captain Kirk.
  • Most likely to say: "Where did I leave my cigarettes" or "Oh good, another day off."
  • Least likely to say: "God save the Queen."