jeniwren@compuserve.com
When my son was born, I discovered the true meaning of a mother's love. The instant my eyes fell on the bluish squalling big-cheeked naked form of my son, I knew I was in love. It was, without question, the most powerful moment of my entire life. Now, I don't know what causes that instantaneous love-at-first-sight phenomenon but I'm going to assume for the sake of argument that it's a biological thing.
So, with that in mind, I would like to take a moment to recognize those incredible people who take children not of their biological inheritance and love them just as deeply.
A professional colleague of mine was profiled in his company's newsletter some years ago, noting that he has eight children, five of whom had been adopted a few years earlier. Since then, I've had numerous opportunities to discuss with him how he and his wife came to adopt five children all at once. The compiled story is nothing short of amazing.
Alan and his wife were foster parents, frequently taking children into their care for short periods of time. Their three natural children helped teach the foster kids what it was like to be a 'normal' kid from a 'normal' home. I have to assume they were very good at it, because when Children's Protective Services acquired five children from a crack addicted mother they immediately went to Alan's family for help. The children ranged in age from 9 to 2, with the 9 year old acting as mother to the rest. When CPS discovered them (again. They had been in and out of CPS before), they had been abandoned for several days already. CPS felt it was important that the children be kept together, understandable considering that they pretty much depended upon each other as family. I don't know if Alan hesitated or not. I didn't get the impression that he did. Of course it was rough at first, but because of Alan's family, five children got to grow up with a mom and dad and extra sisters and a brother who love them. They got a stable home, and my understanding is that the oldest is just about ready to enter college.
What kind of heart does it take to love someone else's child like your own? I don't know, but it's a pretty spectacular thing.
What if Alan and his family had not been willing to take these kids? What would have happened to them? What happens to the children who are not so lucky? It occurs to me as I write this that one thing I've always taken for granted as an adult is that I have parents to call and tell about what happens in my life.
What happens to a child who bounces from foster family to foster family once they reach their majority? My parents helped me buy my first car. They helped me get my first job. What do children without the stable family I benefited from do to start a productive adult life?
I wonder and worry and to be honest, am scared to volunteer to help. It's one thing to take a reasonably stable child…it's another to take one in who has been abused and requires extra care. Still, if I don't, who will?
[Rave Mode OF..wait a minute...why stop thinking of good things to say?]
