Coming soon to this place, the Simpsons Songs int he Key of Springfield! Come back soon and find the words to everything on the Simpsons songs cd!
It's not complete now, but it should be soon!
1) The Simpsons Main Title Theme- The Simpsons
2) We Do (Stonecutters' song)-
Marge: Homer, a man who called himself You-Know-Who
just invited you to a secret wink-wink at the
you-know-what. You certainly are popular now
that you're a Stonecutter.
Homer: Oh, yeah. "Beer busts, beer blasts, keggers,
stein hoists, A.A. meetings, beer nights..."
It's wonderful, Marge! I've never felt so
accepted in all my life. These people look
deep within my soul and assign me a number
based on the order in which I joined.
Stoncutters: Who controls the British crown?
Who keeps the metric system down?
We do! We do.
Who leaves the Atlantis off the maps?
Who keeps the Martians under wraps?
We do! We do.
Who holds back the electric car?
Who makes Steve Guttenberg a star?
We do! We do.
Who robs cave fish of their sight?
Who rigs every Oscar night?
We do! We do.
3) Dancin' Homer-
a) Crosstown bridge-
Homer: Well kids, there it is, Capital City!
b) Capitol City (Tony Bennett)-
There's a swingin' town I known called... Capital City.
People stop and scream hello in... Capital City.
It's the kind of place that makes a bum feel like a king.
And it makes a king feel like some nutty, cuckoo, super-king.
[Marge: Look, it's Tony Bennett!]
[Tony: Hey, good to see you.]
It's against the law to frown in... Capital City.
You'll caper like a super-clown when you chance to see...
... Fourth Street and `D'! Yeah!
Once you get a whiff of it, you'll never want to roam.
Capital City, my home sweet, yeah!
Capital City, that happy-go city,
It's Capital City, my home sweet swingin' home!
[All: Capital City! Yeah!]
4) Homer and Apu-
a) Who needs the Kwik-e-mart?-
Lisa: I think what my father's saying is, you're like a
member of the family now.
Apu: I feel that way too.
Apu: You see, whether igloo hut, or lean-to, or a geodesic
dome,
There's no structure I have been to, which I'd rather
call my home.
When I first arrived, you were all such jerks,
But now I've come to looooooove your quirks.
Maggie with her eyes so bright,
Marge with hair by Frank Lloyd Wright,
Lisa can philosophize, Bart's adept at spinning lies,
Homer's a delightful fella, sorry about the salmonella.
Homer: Heh heh, that's OK.
Apu: Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Now here comes the tricky part.
Oh, won't you rhyme with me?
Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Marge: Their floors are Stick-E-Mart,
Lisa: They make Dad Sick-E-Mart,
Bart: Let's hurl a Brick-E-Mart,
Homer: The Kwik-E-Mart is real... D'oh!
Apu: Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart?
Not meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...
All: Forget the Kwik-E-Mart,
Goodbye to Kwik-E-Mart,
Who needs Kwik-E-mart?
Apu: Not me.
b) Who needs the Kwik-e-mart? (reprise)-
Homer: Everything really wrapped up nicely. Ooh,
much quicker than usual.
Marge: I guess we've learned that happiness is wherever
you find it.
Homer: And we've all found happiness, every one of us.
[Apu sobs in the background]
Hey, what's that sound?
Apu: Who needs the Kwik-E-Mart? I dooooooooo.
Homer: Hey, he's not happy at all. He lied to us through
song. I hate when people do that!
5) 'Round Springfield (medly)
a) Bleeding Gums Blues-
Lisa: I got the album!
D.J.: Here, you can listen to it on this.
Lisa: Oh, I did the best I could bleeding gums.
b) A Four-headed King-
Lisa: That was for you Bleeding Gums.
BG: You've made an old jazzman happy, Lisa.
Mufasa: You must avenge my death, Kimba -- I mean, Simba.
Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father.
James Earl Jones: This is CNN.
BG: Will you guys pipe down? I'm saying goodbye to Lisa!
All: We're sorry.
c) There she sits, Brokenhearted-
Lisa: I don't want you to go.
BG: Sorry, but I have to. Goodbye.
Lisa: [sobbing] Goodbye.
BG: Oh what the heck! Once more from the top!
Lisa: Yay!
d) Jazzman-
Lisa: When the Jazzman's testifyin', a faithless
man believes.
He can sing you into paradise, or bring you to
your knees.
Jazzman, take my blues away,
Make my pain the same as yours with every change
you play.
Jazzman, oh, Jazzman
One more time!
BG: Oh come on Lisa, I got a date with Billie Holiday.
6) "Oh, Streetcar!" (the musical)
a) White-Hot Grease Fires-
Llewelyn: Perhaps we're all a little mad, we who don cap and bells,
and tread beneath the proscenium arch, but, tonight, you will all
be transformed from dead-eyed suburbanites into white hot grease
fires of pure entertainment! Except you, you're not working out.
I'll be playing your part.
Otto: Drag.
b) Long Before the Superdome-
Chief Wiggum: Long before the Superdome,
Where the Saints of football play,
There's a city where the damned call home,
Hear their hellish rondelet!
c) New Orleans-
Cast: New Orleans!
Home of pirates, drunks, and whores...
New Orleans!
Tacky, overpriced souvenir stores...
If you want to go to hell, you should take a trip
To the Sodom and Gomorrah of the Mississip':
New Orleans!
Stinking, rotten, vomiting, vile...
New Orleans!
Putrid, brackish, maggotty, foul...
New Orleans!
Crummy, lousy, rancid and rank...
New Orleans!
d) I thought My Life Would be a Mardi Gras-
Mrs. Lovejoy: What's the matter honey, are you lost?
Marge: I'm looking for my sister, Stella.
Lisa: It's mom!
Homer: huh?
Marge: My name is Blanche Dubois.
I thought my life, would be a Mardi Gras...
A never-ending party... (pause) Ha!
I'm a faded Southern dame without a dime...
e) I am Just a Simple Paper Boy-
Apu: I'm collecting for the Evening Star.
Marge: Come here... I want to kiss you, just once.
Softly, and sweetly... on your mouth...
Apu: I am just a simple paperboy, no romance do I seek.
I just wanted forty cents, for my deliveries last week.
Will this bewitching floozy
Seduce this humble newsie?
Oh, what's a paperboy to... doooooo?
(smooch)
Apu: Woo-hoo!
f) Stella!-
Flanders: Stella! STELLLAAAA!
Can't you hear me YELLA!
You're puttin' me through HELLA!
Stella... STELLLAAAA!
g) She flies
h) The Kindness of Strangers-
Marge: Whoever you are,
I have always depended on the kindness of strangers...
Cast: You can always depend on the kindness of strangers
To pluck up your spirits, and shield you from dangers.
Marge: Now here's a tip from Blanche you won't regret.
Cast: A stranger's just a friend you haven't met.
You ha-ven't met...
Streetcar!
7) Jingle Bells
Robert Goulet: Hi. You from the casino?
Bart: I'm from a casino.
Goulet: Good enough. Let's go.
Smithers: I'm afraid Robert Goulet hasn't arrived yet, sir.
Burns: Hmm. Very well; begin the thawing of Jim Nabors.
Goulet: Are you sure this is the casino? I think I
should call my manager.
Nelson: Your manager says for you to shut up!
Goulet: Vera said that? Hmph.
Jingle Bells,
Batman Smells,
Robin laid an egg,
Batmobile lost its wheel,
The Joker got away, hey!
Thank you, thank you very much.
Milhouse: Ow!
Goulet: Oh, I'm sorry, kid...
8) $pringfield (Medley)
a) The Simpsons End Credits Theme ("Big Band Vegas" Version)
b) Gracie Films Logo
9) "Itchy & Scratchy" Main Title Theme
They fight! And bite!
They fight and bite and fight!
Fight fight fight! Bite bite bite!
The Itchy and Scratchy Show!
10) "Itchy & Scratchy" End Credits Theme
They fought! and bit!
They fought and fought and bit!
Fought, fought, fought!
Bit, bit, bit!
It was The Itchy and Scratchy Show!
11) The Day the Violence Died (Medley)
a) Not Jazz Chor, but Sad Chor-
Krusty: Well, Itchy and Scratchy are gone.
But here's a cartoon that tries to make learning fun!
(tries to laugh, then moans)
Sorry about this kids, but stay tuned; we've got some
real good toy commercials coming right up, I swear.
b) The Amendment Song-
Kid: Hey, who left all this garbage on the steps of Congress?
Amendment: I'm not garbage.
I'm an amendment-to-be, yes an amendment-to-be,
And I'm hoping that they'll ratify me.
There's a lot of flag-burners,
Who have got too much freedom,
I want to make it legal
For policemen to beat'em.
'Cause there's limits to our liberties,
At least I hope and pray that there are,
'Cause those liberal freaks go too far.
Kid: But why can't we just make a law against flag-burning?
Amendment: Because that law would be unconstitutional.
But if we changed the Constitution...
Kid: Then we could make all sorts of crazy laws!
Amendment: Now you're catching on!
Bart: What the hell is this?
Lisa: It's one of those campy '70s throwbacks that appeals to
Generation Xers.
Bart: We need another Vietnam to thin out their ranks a little.
Kid: What if people say you're not good enough to be in the
Constitution?
Amendment: Then I'll crush all opposition to me,
And I'll make Ted Kennedy pay.
If he fights back, I'll say that he's gay.
Congressman: Good news, Amendment! They ratified ya!
You're in the US Constitution!
Amendment: Oh yeah! Door's open boys!
Lisa: So it's true, some cartoons do encourage violence.
(punches Bart)
Bart: Ow!
12) Sen~or Burns
Singer: Wounds won't last long, but an insulting song
Burns will always carry with him.
So I'll settle my score on the salsa floor
With this vengeful Latin rhythm.
Burns!
Con un corazo'n de perro.
Sen~or Burns!
El diablo con dinero.
It may not surprise you, but all of us despise you
Please die, and fry in hell
You rotten rich old wretch --
Adios viejo.
13) The Simpsons End Credits Theme ("Afro-Cuban" Version)
13) Your Wife Don't Understand You
announcer: Our next act is our very own singing waitress, Lurleen.
So I'm afraid drink service will stop for just a few moments while,
They're all yours.
Homer: Stupid Marge, tell me to shut up.
Lurleen: Thank you, uh tonight I'd like to try something a little different.
Its a song I wrote while I was mopping up the dry fudd and tee.
Lurleen: You work all day, for some old man,
Sweat and break your back,
Homer: Yeah.
Lurleen: Then you go home to your castle,
But your queen won't cut you slack.
Homer: That's true.
Lurleen: That's why you're losin' all your hair,
That's why you're overweight,
Homer: Uh huh.
Lurleen: That's why you flipped your pickup truck
Right off the interstate.
Homer: That's right! Except for the pickup truck.
Lurleen: There's a lot of bull they hand you,
There's nothin' you can do,
Your wife don't understand you, but I do,
No your wife don't understand you, but I do!
I said no one understands you but I do!
Homer: Hey, hey Lurleen? I gotta say something to you.
Lurleen: I'm listening.
Homer: Your song touched me in a way I've never felt before.
And which way to the can?
15) Kamp Krusty
a) South of the Border-
Bart: How could you Krusty? I'd never lend my name to an
inferior product.
Krusty: Ohh, they drove a dump truck full of money up to my house!
I'm not made of stone!
Bart: Krusty! This camp was a nightmare! They fed us gruel, they forced
us to make wallets for export, and one of the campers was eaten by
a bear!
Krusty: Oh My God!!
Bart: Well, actually, the bear just ate his hat.
Krusty: Was it a nice hat?
Bart: Oh yeah.
Krusty: Oh My God!! Well I'm going to make it all up to you!
I'm gonna to show you kids the time of your life!
Get ready for two weeks at the happiest place on Earth, Tijuana!
Kids: Yay!
South of the Border Starts:
South of the border,
Down Mexico way.
That's where I fell in love
When stars above came out to play.
And now as I wander,
My thoughts have restrained,
South of the border
Down Mexico way
She was a picture,
In old Spanish lace.
And just for a tender while
I kissed the smile upon her face.
For it was Fiesta,
And we were so gay,
South of the border
Down Mexico way
Those mission bells told me
That I must not stray.
South of the border,
Down Mexico way!
b) Gracie Films Logo-
Ole! (instead the usual `Shhhh!')
End Credids Suite #1
16) Australian Version
17) Hill Street Blues Homage
18) It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad, World Homage
19) Treehouse of Horror V
a) Controlling the Transmission-
Bart: There's nothing wrong with your television set. Do not attempt
to adjust your picture. We are controlling the transmission.
Homer: What's that, boy? We're in control?
Hey, look! I can see my voice!
(laughs) Brrr...hee! Heeee!
Blub blub blub blub blub!
Thiiis...iiis my vooice...on teeeveeeee --
Bart: Dad! You're ruining the mood.
Homer: Sorry.
Bart: For the next half-hour, we will control what you see and hear.
You are about to experience the terror and foul horror of...The
Simpsons Halloween Special.
b) Simpsons Halloween Special Main Title Theme
20) Honey Roasted Peanuts
Homer: Ah, finally a little quiet time to read some of my old favorites...
Honey-roasted peanuts. Ingredients: "Salt, artificial honey-roasting
agents, pressed peanut sweepings..." Mmm.
Marge: Homer, I have to go out to pick up something for dinner.
Homer: Steak?
Marge: Money's too tight for steak.
Homer: Steak?
Marge: Uh, sure, steak.
Homer: Ah, the last peanut -- overflowing with the oil and salt of its
departed brothers.
(He throws the peanut to his mouth and misses)
Uh oh, Something's wrong.
(He searches under the couch for a peanut)
Homer: Ow, pointy!
Eww, slimy.
Uh oh, moving!
Ah-ha! Oh, twenty dollars...I wanted a peanut!
Homer's brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts!
Homer: Explain how.
Homer's brain: Money can be exchanged for good and services.
Homer: Woo hoo! (chuckles, then trips) Woah!
21) Boy Scoutz N the Hood
a) Saved By the Bell-
Apu: Hello Gent's. What will it be?
Milhouse: Apu, give us a Super Squishy!
Bart: One that's made entirely out of syrup.
Apu: Entirely out...gasp!
Crowd: Gasp!
Apu: An All Syrup Super Squisy? Oh s-such a thing has never been done!
Bart: Just make it happen.
Apu: Oh, oh dear!
(Machine makes loud noises)
Apu: Ooh, she won't hold! She's breaking up!
Ding!
Apu: All done! If you survive, please come again!
b) Jackpot-
Bart and Milhouse: Yeah, Woohoo!
Milhouse: It's so thick! (suck suck, cough cough)
Your turn Bart.
Bart: (drinks the squishy) Whoa! That's good squishy! (moans)
Milhouse: What's it like Bart? Bart? Bart?
Bart: (mumbles and stuff)
Milhouse: Gimme that! (takes drink) (Make's weird sugerhigh noises)
Bart: OK, we're young, rich, and full of sugar. What do we do?
Milhouse: Let's go crazy, Broadway style!
c) Springfield, Springfield-
Bart and Milhouse: Springfield, Springfield, it's a hell of a town:
the schoolyard's up and the shopping mall's down.
The stray dogs go to the animal pound,
Bart: Springfield, Springfield!
Milhouse: Springfield, Springfield!
Sailor: New York, New York!
Bart: New York is that-a-way, man!
Sailor: Thanks, kid!
Bart and Milhouse: It's a hell of a towwwwwwwwwwwn!
(Music plays)
Homer: Mmm, free goo.
Bart: Hey, don't hog all that squishy!
Barney: I don't know where you magic pixies came from...but I like
your pixie drink!
(Apu laughs)
d) Remember This?-
Bart: (groans) Oh, my head.
Lisa: Tsk, tsk, tsk, the remorse of the sugar junkie.
Bart: Ohh...I don't remember anything.
Lisa: Really? Not even...this?
Bart: Aah! Oh, no! I must have joined the Junior Campers.
Lisa: The few, the proud, the geeky. (laughs)
Bart: Boy, a man on a Squishy bender can sure do some crazy things.
e) Another Edwardian Morning-
Bart: OK, look: I made a terrible mistake. I wandered into a Junior
Camper recruitment center, but what's done is done: I've made my bed,
and now I've got to weasel out of it.
Marge: I know you think the Junior Campers are square and "uncool", but
they also do a lot of neat things, like sing-alongs and flag
ceremonies.
Homer: Marge, don't discourage the boy. Weaseling out of things is
important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals!...
except the weasels.
22) Two Dozen and One Greyhounds
a) The Pick of the Litter-
Mr. Burns: You stay with me. You're the pick of the litter!
Lisa: Maybe we were wrong about Burns on this one.
b) See My Vest-
Smithers: Are you sure you want to go through with this, Sir? You do have a
very full wardrobe as it is.
Mr. Burns: Yes...but not completely full. For you see...
Yes...but not completely full. For you see...
(singing) Some men hunt for sport, others hunt for food,
The only thing I'm hunting for is an outfit that looks good.
See my vest, see my vest, made from real gorilla chest,
Feel this sweater, there's no better than authentic Irish Setter.
See this hat? 'Twas my cat. My evening wear? Vampire bat.
These white slippers are albino African endangered rhino.
Grizzly bear underwear, turtles' necks, I've got my share.
Beret of poodle on my noodle it shall rest.
Try my red robin suit, it comes one breast or two,
See my vest, see my vest, see my vest!
Like my loafers? Former gophers! It was that or skin my chauffers,
But a greyhound fur tuxedo would be best.
So let's prepare these dogs --
Woman: Kill two for matching clogs!
Mr. Burns: See my vest, see my vest, oh please, won't you see my vest?
(spoken) I really like the vest.
Smithers: I gathered, yeah.
Lisa: He's going to make a tuxedo out of our puppies!
(Bart hums "See my vest")
Lisa: Bart!
Bart: Sorry. You gotta admit, it's catchy.
23) "Eye On Springfield" Theme
Kent Brockman: Hello, I'm Kent Brockman, and this is Eye on Springfield!
("Eye on Springfield Theme")
Homer: Wow! Info-tainment!
24) Flaming Moe's
When the weight of the world has got you down
and you want to end your life.
Bills to pay, a dead-end job,
and problems with the wife.
But don't throw in the towel,
'cuz there's a place right down the block...
Where you can drink your misery away...
At Flaming Moe's.... (Let's all go to Flaming Moe's...)
When liquor in a mug (Let's all go to Flaming Moe's...)
can warm you like a hug. (Flaming Moe's...)
And happiness is just a Flaming Moe away...
Happiness is just a Flaming Moe away...
All: Barney!
Bartender: How's the world treating you, Mr. Gumbel?
Barney: (belch)
25) Homer's Barbershop Quartet