"What Dreams May Come"
(previous post the worried "Operational Readiness")
-------
Stardate: 60318.0500
Setting: USS ANUBIS, Counseling Suite.
Susan could not recall a time she'd been up so early. Ever. Somewhere
in the back of her mind drifted an image of a sleepover party when she'd been
up all night... but it was too vague a memory to call up any emotions...
or coping mechanisms.
Susan gave a huge yawn as she entered the room and waved away the
traces of incense that still hung in the air from her last get-in-touch-with-Sol session. The Counseling Suite was still dark because the imaginary sun
that governed the ship's days and nights had not yet risen.
"Lights!" Susan called... and nearly jumped out of her skin.
There was someone already in the room. Someone who had been sitting in
the darkness, quietly watching. Someone in a Romulan uniform.
Susan collapsed onto the couch opposite the person, "Lieutenant. You
almost gave me a heart attack. Mind telling me why you didn't wait outside the
door for me..."
Serenna was quick to apologize, "I'm sorry. I've been trying to get
into character and sometimes I think I may take it too far..."
Susan rubbed her forehead, still trying to get over the shock. One
thing that no Starfleet Officer wants to see when they arrive at the office
one morning, is someone in a Romulan uniform already sitting there. "Is
that why you wanted to talk?" she asked.
The Romulan/Terran hybrid contemplated while Susan got herself a cup of
tea. She was tempted to order coffee at this time in the morning... but she
remembered how she'd never liked the bitter taste of it and thought the
better of it, ordering her usual tea instead.
When Susan sat down again, Serenna said thoughtfully, "It might be."
Susan took a sip of tea and raised her eyebrows, prompting Serenna to
continue.
Serenna got up and walked over to the large viewport, "I had a strange
dream last night."
"About the mission?" asked Susan, seeing where this was going.
Surprisingly, Serenna shook her head.
"No, about Romulus."
"Were you thinking about Romulus before you went to sleep?"
"Or course -"
"- Well, then that explains it."
Susan immediately felt she'd been a bit short and opened her mouth to
explain further. However, there was no need. Serenna had turned to
Susan and was shaking her head.
"No, it doesn't. I always think about Romulus before I go to sleep. I
have that flag in my room, after all. But I've only dreamed of Romulus once.
When I was a child. And it was never as vivid as this. This time..."
She looked out the window again, "This time I felt like I was there..."
She trailed off, lost in the memories of her dream and Susan walked
over to her quietly, placing her tea cup on her desk as she passed. She stood
beside Serenna and stared out the window for a few minutes before saying
quietly, "Maybe because you are."
Serenna looked at her as if she was mad.
Susan shrugged, 'Not literally, of course. But figuratively. Just look
at yourself."
Serenna looked down at the Romulan uniform and Susan continued, "You've
been living, eating and sleeping Romulus. It's bound to come up in a dream.
Your subconscious is just as filled up with The Romulan Star Empire as your
conscious.
Understanding dawned in Serenna's eyes, 'I suppose that must be it...
but still... It was so vivid..."
She seemed to shake herself off mentally and then said, "That actually
wasn't what I intended to talk to you about."
Susan raised her eyebrows in surprise, "Oh? Well..." She gestured back
to the couch, "Have a seat. Would you like something to drink?"
Serenna shook her head and, once they had both sat down again, the
Romulan/Terran hybrid said, "Before I went to sleep tonight, I intended
to talk to you about getting into the psyche of a Romulan intelligence
agent."
Susan wanted to say, "You're asking me?" but refrained and told her
ratty mind to keep quiet - it was not a morning mind and tended to get upset
very easily in the early hours of the day. "Well," Susan said in a measured
voice, "I can't tell you from personal experience, you may want to talk
to the ANUBIS' ILO about that... but I can tell you that anyone's psyche
is a complex thing. Though organizations like the Tal'Shiar will probably
try to stamp that out... "
She retrieved her tea cup and continued, "The psyche is made up of
everyone's own personal experiences. Early life, relationships,
near-death experiences. As far as I know - not being the most experienced on the subject - the idea behind being any kind of collector of intelligence
is to bury that psyche and become almost machine-like in approach. You go
into places where you aren't supposed to be, take in all those details and
report back to whoever sent you. No scruples. And no obstacles."
She sipped her tea and was disappointed to find that it was already
almost cold. "I can imagine." she said, "that that takes an incredible toll on
any sentient being with a psyche."
Serenna looked interested. This was what she'd come to find out more
about, "And, how would that toll manifest itself. Physically, I mean. Would it
show in the way I portray my character?"
Susan sat and though for a second, "Umm... I suppose that shutting all
irrelevant information from the conscious mind - such as emotions, say
- would probably lead to an overload of the unconscious. Nightmares and
such."
Her eyes met Serenna's as they both wondered silently whether the
Romulan/Terran hybrids strange dreams were a result of her playing the
Tal'Shiar agent so precisely.
Susan looked away and down at her tea cup. "I can also guess that such
suppression would lead to the person appearing cold and distant to
others. But incredibly observant - to the point of paranoia. Paranoia and not
expressing emotions are, in some cases, learned skills. Taught through
year of expecting the worst-case scenario all the time and not interacting
with others on a personal level..."
Susan trailed off, realizing that she'd run out of advice, 'I hope that
helps?"
Serenna seemed to contemplate Susan for a minute. Then she nodded.
"Thank you, you have been of great assistance."
Susan smiled, glad that *she* thought so. Susan was not so sure. "You
really should go and talk to the ILO." She offered by way of apology.
Serenna nodded again, "I intend to." and left Susan and her cold cup of
tea alone.
With a sigh, Susan sat down on the couch, wondering if she had time for
a nap. No sooner had she thought the thought when her door chimed.
**On with the day!** she thought valiantly, before saying out load,
"Enter."
--------------- 2005 post #143
Tallulah Habib {thabib@eject.co.za}
Ensign Susan Mei
Head Counselor
USS ANUBIS
---------------
"Life is mostly froth and bubble,
Two things stand like stone,
Kindness in another's trouble,
Courage in your own." - Adam Lindsay Gordon
