HEY THERE, COME ON IN AND MEET MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER, HE IS THE ONE THAT I PLAN ON SPENDING THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH AND ETERNITY -- I MIGHT AS WELL, SINCE HIS MOTHER WONT EXCHANGE HIM, GIVE ME A REFUND OR ELSE. BUT JOKES ASIDE, HE IS THE ONE. LET ME TELL YOU THE STORY OF OUR MEETING:
I FIRST MET HIM IN 1977, (HE WAS 18 AND I WAS 16) WHEN HE WAS STATIONED IN GERMANY WITH THE US ARMY. WE MET, WE FELL IN LOVE, GOT MARRIED, HAD A CHILD - SAM - ALL IN THE SPACE OF LESS THAN 2 YEARS. NEEDLESS TO SAY, NEITHER ONE OF US KNEW WHAT WE WERE DOING AND HOW TO DO IT RIGHT. DUE TO CIRCUMSTANCES BEYOND OUR CONTROL, IN DECEMBER OF 1979 WE ENDED UP SEPERATED, THE ARMY HAD SHIPPED HIM BACK TO THE US WITHOUT ME OR OUR CHILD AND SINCE THE PAPERWORK WASN'T COMPLETE, SAM AND I WERE GOING NOWHERE.
AFTER A COUPLE OF YEARS I FILED FOR DIVORCE AND WENT ON WITH MY LIFE.
IN 1982 I GOT MARRIED TO RICK AND WE HAD ROBERT, RICK AND CORY AND HE WAS A GOOD STEP FATHER FOR SAM ( THE ONLY FATHER HE KNEW UNTIL HE WAS 12 YEARS OLD AND RICK AND I SPLIT UP). ANYHOW, RICK AND I GOT OUT OF THE ARMY IN 1988 AND SETTLED IN DETROIT, MICHIGAN, AND PROCEEDED TO SET UP HOUSE HERE. THINGS WERE ALRIGHT UNTIL RICK DECIDED HE NEEDED TO BE FREE AND FOOT LOOSE. DURING THAT TIME I, FOR NO UNDERSTANDABLE REASON WENT AND SEARCHED FOR KEN AND I FOUND HIM. MY MARRIAGE WENT DOWN THE TUBE OVER THE NEXT COUPLE OF YEARS AND I CONTINUEDTO TALK TO KEN BY PHONE, HE WAS IN CALIFORNIA AT THE TIME. BUT ONE DAY OVER THE PHONE, WE HAD A FALLING OUT AND I CEASED TO CALL HIM . BUT I WAS STILL IN CONTACT WITH HIS MOM AND KEPT HER UP TO DATE ON HOW THINGS WERE GOING AROUND HERE.
MEANWHILE, RICK DIVORCED ME AND TOOK RICKY AND CORY WITH HIM -- I DO SEE THEM EVERY WEEK AND THEY DON'T LIVE TOO FAR AWAY FROM MY HOUSE. LIFE GOES ON, AND YEARS PASSED, I WORKED AND DID MY THINGS. THEN ONE DAY, JANUARY 3RD 1998, I GOT A PHONE CALL. I HAD NO CLUE ABOUT WHO IT WAS, ( TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHICH OF MY EX BOYFRIENDS IT WAS WITHOUT SAYING THE WRONG NAME), ONLY THAT THE GUY HAD A SEXY VOICE - BARRY WHITE EAT YOUR HEART OUT! - AND FISHING FOR CLUES. IT TOOK QUITE A NUMBER OF CLUES FROM HIM AND TO MY SHAME, IF HE HADN'T TOLD ME, I WOULDN'T HAVE FIGURED IT OUT. SO FROM THERE WE STARTED A LONG DISTANCE ROMANCE FOR THE NEXT 8 OR SO WEEKS BY LETTER AND PHONE AND IN FEBRUARY 1998 HE PACKED UP HIS STUFF AND CAME TO MICHIGAN.
WHAT IS FUNNY, RICK NEVER WANTED "HIS KIDS" AROUND KEN, DUE TO MY BAD FEELINGS ABOUT KEN AND OUR MARRIAGE -( I TRULY HATED HIM FOR THE LONGEST AND OF COURSE DID NOT HAVE A GOOD THING TO SAY ABOUT HIM AND RICK BASED HIS OPINION ON MY "TESTIMONY")- AND NOW HIS KIDS WERE GOING TO GET TO KNOW THIS MAN AND THERE WAS NOTHING HE COULD DO ABOUT IT. ALSO SAM HAD TO WORK OUT A LOT OF HOSTILE EMOTIONS TOWARD HIS NATURAL FATHER AND IT WAS NOT EASY.
KEN AND I HAD BOTH CHANGED IN THE 20 YEARS THAT WE HAD BEEN APART AND IT WAS SCARY, BUT IT WORKED REAL WELL. AS OF NOW, SAM HAS RECONSILED HIMSELF WITH HIS FATHER, EVENTHOUGH HE DOES NOT CALL HIM DAD, RATHER POPS, FATHER OR BY HIS FIRST NAME. RICKY AND CORY LOVE HIM LIKE HE WAS THEIR NATURAL FATHER AND HE LOVES HIM EQUALLY. THEY THINK THE WORLD OF EACHOTHER AND WILL DO ANYTHING FOR EACHOTHER.
SADLY, KEN - HE GOT MARRIED AGAIN AFTER OUR SPLIT - HAS A SON, KEVIN, WHO IS ONLY 2 MONTHS YOUNGER THAN RICKY, THAT DOES NOT WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH HIM. HIS MOTHER TOOK HIM AWAY WHEN KEVIN WAS ONLY A BABY AND SO KEVIN NEVER REALLY GOT TO KNOW KEN AS HIS FATHER. KEN ONLY HAS THE RIGHT TO PAY SUPPORT FOR HIM, BUT DOES NOT GET TO SEE HIM. IN THE TIME THAT HE HAS BEEN HERE IN DETROIT, KEVIN HAS MADE NO ATTEMPTS TO MEET HIS OLDER HALF BROTHER - SAM - OR THE REST OF HIS NEW FAMILY. WHEN KEN TOLD HIM THAT HE WAS GOING TO MOVE TO MICHIGAN, KEVIN TOLD HIM THAT HE DOES NOT CARE AND DOES NOT WISH TO EVER SEE HIM AGAIN.
WE HAVE SPENT A LOT OF TIME TALKING ABOUT THE FIRST TIME AROUND, THE MISTAKES AND GOOD TIMES, BUT WE BOTH AGREE THAT NOW IT IS BETTER, FOR WE BOTH HAVE GROWN AND MATURED. HOWEVER, WE BOTH DO WONDER HOW IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN IF THINGS WOULD HAVE WENT DIFFERENT AND WE NEVER HAD BEEN SEPERATED.
YES, THERE ARE REGRETS, BUT WE UNDERSTAND THAT NEITHER OF US WOULD BE WHO WE ARE NOW IF NOT FOR THESE TRIALS. AND ALSO, THERE IS NO GUARANTEE THAT WE WOULD STILL BE TOGETHER IF HAD STAYED TOGETHER IN 1979.
I AM GLAD THAT HE IS HERE, AND THIS TIME FOR ALL THE RIGHT REASONS. OUR FEELINGS HAVE WITH STOOD THE TEST OF TIME AND NOW WE HAVE THE RELATIONSHIP THAT WE BOTH ALWAYS WANTED. WE DON'T SHARE EVERYTHING, I HATE FISHING AND HE IS NOT INTO MY CRAFTS, BUT WE SPEND OUR TIME TOGETHER MEANINGFUL. WHAT WE DO TOGETHER COUNTS AND MAKES US BOTH HAPPY.
HE IS ONE HECK OF A MAN!!!!!!!!!!! AND ALL MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU HONEY AND THANK YOU FOR BEING WITH ME AND THE KIDS. XOXOXOXOXOXO
|