Yes, it's the academy award winning movie that made gore and horror socially acceptable! A real high class psychological thriller, starring cinematic favorites Anthony Perkins, Jody Foster, and... Roger Corman?! Yep, that bastard killer of the movie industry makes a cameo appearance, along with zombie master George Romero. And yes folks, it STILL managed to pick up several Oscars... Our story follows Claire: an FBI trainee looking to join the "Behavioral Sciences" (i.e. headshrinkers) division of the Federal Butt-Inners. As a little final test, she get assigned on a fact finding mission about Dr. Hannibal Lecter, a.k.a. "Hannibal the Cannibal". This is actually Hannibal's second film appearance, his first being MANHUNTER in 1986, adapted from Tom Harris's book "Red Dragon". But, I'm selectively illiterate, so I don't know it if it was any good. Keeping with our current film, Claire goes to visit Dr. Lecter (whose cell bars have been replaced with glass, while his fellow tenants still have steel bars...), who plays a few mind games with her and snags her interest. After finishing with the good psychiatrist-turned-psychotic, Claire is then splattered with the spoog flung by another inmate. In a sort of apology for his fellow inmate's crude impoliteness, Lecter plays with the semen chucker's head, doing a little "mental programming" and persuading the guy to swallow his own tongue! Nice apology, making a guy suffocate himself in such a crude way. Claire then checks out a lead she pulls from one of Hannibal's seemingly nonsensical rantings, as she investigates a storage rental place and finds... a severed head! DRAMATIC REVERB!!! The head-without-a-body used to belong to a former patient of Dr. "the Cannibal", who was supposedly dead when Lecter found him. Cannibal's rantings seem to betray that he knows an awful lot about a recent rash of murders that have been baffling the fuzz lately, involving a guy lovingly dubbed "Buffalo Bill", because of his habit of skinning his victims. This makes me think of the fact that there never were any buffalo in the U.S. Buffalo only exist in Africa, BISON existed in America, though "Bison Bill" doesn't work as well, so it's okay. As I was saying, Hannibal seems to know a little too much about this guy, who happens to be kidnapping his latest female victim as all this is happening. Boy, this is a pretty big case Claire's getting involved in, considering she's just a trainee. One of Bill's victims is found with a little extra baggage in his throat: a cocoon belonging to a "Death's Head Moth", imported from Asia. Hannibal makes a little plea bargain with Claire, saying that he'll help out on the case, provided he gets a nice cushy cell in a scenic minimum security prison upstate. She says she'll see what she can do, so Hannibal gives her a little tip: the Death's Head Moth is supposed to represent change. What's this mean? It means that ol' Bill is either a cross-dresser, or he plans on getting a sex change. Yeah, all guys would jump at the chance to experience PMS... just take our Playstations away and you'd get the same effect! As we go check in on Bill, his latest victim (the chubby daughter of a U.S. Senator) is still alive, as he keeps her stuffed down in the bottom of a pit in his basement, sending her food with a bucket on a rope. Wonder if that's how she keeps from lining her cell with human waste too... hope it's not the same bucket! Okay, stomach churning thoughts aside, let's go back to Lecter, who's decided to spill the beans to the feds, in exchange for his cell-with-a-view. Turns out the headless transvestite was one of Bill's ex-lovers, and Bill had to off him because he got nervous or something. Claire sneaks in to visit Hannibal in his temporary digs while he awaits transport (it looks like they just put up a cell in the middle of a museum), where he gives her REAL information, in exchange for some personal info about her. More precisely, about her childhood, when she ran away from home with a sheep to keep it from getting killed by her adoptive 'rents, or, to prevent the "silencing of the lambs". But, she and the sweater with legs were caught, the lamb was slaughtered, and she was sent to an orphanage, denied her wish to save at least one innocent from death. So, she became a cop, to prevent any more "lambs" (innocent people) from being "silenced" (killed, ya jackass). However, Claire is found out before she can get the killer's real name, and she's taken away. Afterwards, the not-so-good doctor uses a pen tip to pick his cuffs, then proceeds to beat the SHIT out of the guards, using their own weapons! Yeah, Silence of the Hams! Die piggies! Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! The reinforcements find Lecter "dead" on top of an elevator, but we learn that our villain is actually in an ambulance on his way to the hospital, courtesy of his guard disguise, complete with mask of flesh! He awakens in the ambulance, kills off the cops escorting him (remember, they were fooled by the facial mask and think he's one of the guards), as well as a tourist for extra points. Elsewhere, we learn of Bill's fiendish plan to make a full body "woman" costume out of the flesh he's been collecting (not unlike the one Ted Raimi made in SKINNER), because the hospital wouldn't allow him to get a sex change (since he's not exactly in a sound state of mind), and Santa doesn't take the Christmas wishes of fruitcakes too seriously. Of course, cannibal gave the feds the wrong info, and they're off raiding some empty home in the Pennsylvania suburbs, while Claire is at the real location! This leads to a dramatic and suspense filled hunt through the guy's darkly lit catacombs he calls a basement, which ends with Claire victorious, despite the loony's fancy-shmancy night-vision shades. Afterwards Hannibal calls her from a Cuban airport, congratulating her on a job well done, and revealing his plan to kill the asshole doctor/prison warden who's been such a dick to nice Mr. Lecter during his confinement. By far, the best part of this epic was Hopkin's job as Lecter. The guy's so fucking evil and insane, but 92% of the time, it's all hidden behind this misleading mask of a distinguished and well educated man. Creepier than I could've imagined. This was an awesome flick, though less action than I had anticipated, I still think it was phenomenal, especially in it's job at bringing some respect back to the horror industry and making bloody violence acceptable, WITH intelligence to boot! Fuck you MPAA, this bitch was an Oscars sweeper! The one thing that really bugged me though, was Claire's accent. It really digs into you like a barbed sextant in your neck! Same reason I can't stand to watch FARGO! Fucking hicks!

Sequels: HANNIBAL

If You Liked This Flick, Check Out: SEVEN or HENRY: PORTRAIT OF A SERIAL KILLER