Leia: Help me with these refugees!
NR Guard: I'd like to, lady, but I've got a really bad stomachache and...Ah, screw it, I just want to live! *runs onto transport*
*Battle rages*
Leia: Hi, Wurth.
Wurth Skidder: What's up?
Leia: Darn Yuuzhan Vong.
Skidder: Cool beans. *gets captured*
*boring political stuff*
Skidder: Hello, yammosk. Can you do me a favor?
Yammosk: Surely durely![/Flanders]
Skidder: Make Chine-kal think...
Yammosk: Well darn diddly 'arn, I'm afraid I can't do that, Jeedai.[/Flanders]
Skidder: Cool beans. *gets hauled off*
Leia: Help me, Isolder Kenobi, you're my only hope.
Isolder: But my name isn't Ken-
*Leia bats eyes*
Isolder: Sure...I'll...help...you...you...sexy...beast.
*more boring stuff about spice trails*
Droid: You are the Chosen One sent to save us.
Han: Shut it.
Droid: But you saved us.
Han: I really-
Droma: -hate droids.
Han: Hey!
Droma: I smell.
*even more boring stuff about Corellia*
Kyp: We're here to save you, Wurth.
Skidder: Cool beans. But I'm dying. Just save the Hutt.
Kyp: The Hutt?!
Skidder: He's the Chosen One, even though the Oracle didn't say so. Get Randa out of the Matrix.
Kyp: What the f*** are you talking about?
Skidder: Cool beans. *dies*
*battle at Fondor*
Jacen: They're at Fondor.
Anakin: Ah, poodoo.
Jacen: Don't use the Force in aggression.
Anakin: Ok.
Thracken Sal-Solo: Whatever. *fires Centerpoint*
Isolder: Leia, honey, it's fine. When I get back we can go to a nice mountain retreat and-
*Centerpoint blows away the Hapan fleet*
Isolder: Oh, f***...
the end
The Crystal Star - courtesy of mrslush50
Waru: I'm from another dimension and don't belong in Star Wars at all.
Hethrir: I'm freakin' crazy and stupid!
*boring stuff happens*
Wes: I'm not in this book at all!
Wedge: Me, neither.
Plot: Me, neither!
*Solo twins get kidnapped*
*nothing happens*
THE END
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