| Let's have a laugh... |
![[Yahooligans!]](http://www.yahooligans.com/images/ykd_35.gif){kind=small} |
| I went to this meeting that helps shy people over come their shyness, no one turned up... |
| A sign outside a clairvoyant shop in Dudley ( Business is closed due to illness. ) Some bright spark had written under it ( Bet you didn't see that coming. ) |
| Strange but true fact 3. Go into a public place packed with people and shout "Hey you twat." and everybody turns around |
| Bill, a bit of a thickie from Coventry, was chosen for The prize is great, a new game show, and to everyone's surprise got through to the final round. "Now Bill, youv'e done really well so far. and now it's time for the Big Prize question," said the host. Just answer this and you could be going on a Caribbean cruise for a family of 4, for 2 weeks with a Ford Focus car waiting for you when you return home and $2,000 in spending money." "Great," said Bill. "Now, I want you to think very hard about this one, and don't reply untill you"re sure you have a answer. You'll have 30 seconds but the first answer you give me is the only one I can accept. Do you understand?." "Er yeah, Bob." "Okay, Bill, your Big Prize question is...how many seconds in a year?." Bill thought long and hard as the big studio clock ticked away. Sweat poured off his brow till. Finally the gong went. "Now Bill, do you have a answer?." "Yes Bob." "So, Bill for the holiday, the car and the cash, how many seconds in a year?." "Twelve, Bob." The game show host was flabbergasted. "Twelve." the game show host asks in disbelieve. "Yeah, that's right," said Bill. "There's the second of January, the second of February..." |
| Srange but true fact 4. The past,present and future will always be at the same time, it occupies the same period of time, and, that time is now, for now is the present, and, only at the present can you look back at the past, or look forward to the future, therefore, all three time scales occur at the one time, this is due to time itself, time doesn't allow for shift. |
| What as a hazel nut in every bite?.. Squirrel shit.... |
| Strange but true fact 5. We must fear the knowledge of the meek more than the anger of the strong. |
| Did you hear about the scruffy little poor girl who bought matching luggage for her honeymoon.? All her carrier bags came from the same supermarket... |
| I bought this bottle of medicine to help me build up my strenght, I couldn't get the bloody top of |
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| Get this ****** scribble of my ****** wall |