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JOKES !

We love jokes at Milford Supplies, so we have compiled a few about DIY for you to enjoy.

* CAN YOU CATCH THE ALIEN ? *

What's the difference between David Beckham and a DIY set of drawers made without adhesive ?

One is a glue-less kit and the other is a.......!

Victoria Beckham told David to go down to Milford Supplies to buy some nails.

How long do you want them ? asked Craig. 

David replied......."oh I need to keep them !" 

Craig went into Milford Supplies and bought an electric chainsaw and asked "Does it come with a guarantee ?"

Brett replied  "yes...but don't come running back if you saw off your legs !" 

......Craig came back and said "I'm going to sue you"

Brett replied "You don't have a leg to stand on!"

 

Darren went into Milford Supplies and asked to borrow the saw.

Andy said "if you saw off your hand don't point the finger at us!"

How many Milford Supplies staff does it take to change a light bulb ?

Four....Brett to hold the steps, Maria to screw it up, Andy to screw it in and Jamie to supervise !

Knock Knock..........Who's there ?

The builder....who did you think it was banging !

Sam came into the shop and asked Brett what would she need to make a chicken run.

Brett replied.....A big stick !!!

Dave came back into Milford Supplies. "I have a complaint about your leaf rake........It caused me to break my leg".

'How on earth did a leaf rake break your leg Dave?'

When I started raking, I fell out the tree !         

How many Milford Supplies cashiers does it take to change a light bulb ?

None.... Maria won't even give you change for a £5 note !

How many DIY buffs does it take to change a light bulb ?

One,... but 2 weekends and 3 trips to Milford Supplies !

How many real men does it take to change a light bulb ?

None....she can cook in the dark !