More Thoughts
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make
terrible?
Some days you are the bug, some days you are the windshield.
Don't squat with your spurs on.
Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
Timing has an awful lot to do with the outcome of a rain dance.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
Always remember you're unique -- just like everyone else.
"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language.
Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
Always remember you're unique -- just like everyone else.
Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in
the universe you will believe them but if they tell you a wall has
wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
Never miss a good chance to shut up.
Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving.
Anything worth taking seriously is worth making fun of.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away, and you
have their shoes.
Always remember you're unique -- just like everyone else.
The older you get, the better you get (unless you're a banana)
Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person
drives a race car not called a racist?
Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it
back in your pocket.
Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Shocksnpegs '05 Deep Thoughts
