Help
For I am lost
A stranger in my head
An intruder in my thoughts
In my exploration of mind I have been trapped
Unable to break free of my own boundaries
Why can I not set myself free?
When I am the one who has set the trap that caught myself?
What do I wish to tell myself that I already know?
What do I wish to show myself that I already see?
Why do I remain imprisoned by my own will?
I do not know
Stabbing shards of glass
pierce through my eyes,
I forgot how it felt
since the last time I cried
My heart beats in my chest
like a thunderbolt from Zeus,
My throat is sore and raw,
as if someone’s tightening my noose.
How can this hurt me so?
The pain should be elsewhere dealt.
For the betrayal of my love,
lays on a hateful notepad spelt.
Love
Envelopes you in red velvet blankets
Then
Strips them from you leaving you bare against cold, prying eyes
Love
Showers you in satin kisses
Then
Drowns you in fresh tears
Love
Fills you with peaceful butterflies that raise you into bliss
Then
Leaves you letting you meet the cold, hard floor
Love
Can fill the cracks of your broken heart, mending the hurts and filling you with an everlasting warmth.
The eyes of a child
Pure as pristine waters
Their gaze not yet tarnished by the evils of the world
Their lids not yet worn from shutting out the hate
Their lashes not yet singed by the torches of war
Not yet has a rain of tears come down to clear away worries
Not yet has the bright light of fame blinded them
Not yet have they been filled with the ideals of society
The eyes of a child
Pure as pristine waters
But for how much longer?
Time heals all wounds.
How can that be true?
When each tiny grain of sand
Tears you up inside.
They bury you.
Suffocate you.
Time is made of tiny shards of glass
that slowly press into your being
and nestle in your heart.
And each time you take a breath,
time scratches your throat
and fills your lungs with hurt.
Time doesn’t heal all wounds.
It may heal a cut
a bruise
a scratch
but time just makes the gaping hole grow wider
then fills it with grief
Time doesn’t heal all wounds.
Tears fall
They may as well be blood
For I have been wounded
Deeply
Into the depths of my heart
The dagger of war has been thrust through my soul, my being
The broken pieces of my faith lay, shattered on the floor
The daggers wrath has ended, though it’s throbbing pain still reminates in my chest
My tears do nothing but blind me
They blind me from the sight of the dagger
Lying on the floor
A letter
A letter which told of his death and my demise
Windows gaping
Grinning
Walls compressing
Leering
Heart is thudding
Pounding
Mind is racing
Out of control
In a room
A room that kills
A room that chills me to the bone
On my own
All alone
As my heart stops beating
And my mind stops racing
And my spirit stops fighting
As I feel no more
If it were that I never saw you again,
I would not despair.
If it were that you died,
I would not mourn.
If it were that you cried,
I would not dry your tears.
If it were that you screamed,
I would simply shield my ears.
If it were that your gaze never fell from my face,
I would close my eyes forever to the world.
You are my enemy.
You are my curse.
You are my reflection.
Heart left shattered
Soul left tattered
Spirit left battered
All thrown and scattered
Imprinted a token
Of a man’s faith broken
My heart has spoken
Of a faith no more….
Outside
Swimming
Through the air
Out of myself
Body lays lifeless
Spirit is soaring
Freed
From the chambers of flesh and bone
Reborn
In death
To the light
At peace
As one
With life
Yet separate
All the same.
Oh dear G-d,
What was that I felt?
A feeling inside which stands out like a welt.
An uncertain flutter,
To strong for these words
A song who’s lyric
Cannot go unheard.
An anguished cry
from the depths of my heart
A darkness from which
I cannot depart.
Please help me, I’m sinking
My spirit is fading
This life, which I’ve cursed,
I am only now wading
Depression. That’s it.
But it feels like something more
Like my cursed existence
Is nearing the door.
My sanity remains, just enough so I can see
What it feels like to be missing,
Yet also to only be.
Death offered me some candy,
I shook my head and passed.
Death walked along beside me and said;
“This is your last chance.”
I said to him; “no thank you”
He continued on along
saying “But this candy is very special,
it will turn your life to song.”
I turned my head to him, intrigued
“by song what do you mean?”
Death smiled sickly sweet and said:
“Why now are you so keen?”
“music is a part of me,
and it seems that part is lost.”
“Well you can take this candy
at very little cost.”
So I took his cheerful candy
And I popped them in my mouth
Death grinned his sickly grin
And walked off towards the south.
The candy was not bitter
As I had first come to believe
Instead it was the sweetest thing
O now what music can I weave?
Hustle quickly
Don’t lose pace
In this superficial race
Closing at nine
Select on sale
Blaze the marble tile trail
Grab it now
You want it first
Or else, perchance, your heart may burst!
The neon lights
Capture your eyes
Come in and buy our pretty lies
Catchy music
Deadly tune
Pulses till you’re fit to swoon
Come buy our dress
You’ll look fine
Marvelous even, you border divine
Paper passes
Aren’t you swell?
Mother of sin, welcome to hell.
Full of lingering shadows and darkened dreams
Tormented beasts and ghosts unseen
These are the thoughts that cloak the mind when someone is caught in this dark time.
Night
These dreams in my head long ago had ceased
When in this time I looked up and no longer saw beasts
I saw glittering diamonds on a black satin pillow
That smothered the world as a dark fog billows
Night’s darkness has faded only its radiance remains
And the dark dreams and shadows that once caused me great pains
Are but a faded diamond on a pillow of old reign.
Wounded confusion
Spinning within
A sadistic cyclone
With a face like him
Tearing me down
Eating me whole
A cancerous tumour
Devouring my soul
Smiling demon
Angel as well
A creature from both sides
of Heaven and Hell
He knows not what
He knows not how
He's killing me slowly
Sir, take a bow.