8 - MM #12: I am under 180. Yup, I weigh 179 today. How cool is that? I went to San Diego last weekend to see Dr. Pollock. I liked him in some ways and not in others. I am excited about seeing Dr. Garcia's staff this friday. I am getting really anxious and frustrated with the thought of possibly having to go through this summer with flabby arms. You can't make it through the summer in vegas without wearing short sleeve shirts! I have had a cold for going on 4 weeks now; been taking antibiotics since for 5 days and still no end in sight. Dr. also put me on Paxil. I feel dizzy and EXTREMELY sad. Its so hard not to cry! I can't belive I feel this way. I am very confused and just really don't understand it; but the harder I try to figure it out, the worse I feel BECAUSE I DON'T UNDERSTAND IT!
12 - I saw Dr. Garcia's staff today. The girl at the counter was less then friendly and the lady who talked to me about what to expect was nearly falling asleep as she was talking to me. Needless to say, I was less then impressed and then when they gave me the quotes, I nearly laughed out loud. They were insane! I ran a few errands and went back to Dr. Rosto's office and asked to see his b/a pics and then booked my surgery. Yup, I am getting hacked up May 13th. I am nervous and excited and a little scared. I think the Paxil might be working. I have had situations in the last couple days where I was sad or mad but didn't "feel" too much. I don't know if I like this. I don't feel "anything" really. Its weird.
15 - I had a date Friday night with a guy named Kris who is 26. He was cute and very nice. He moved here a month ago and is training to be a pro boxer. I also had a date on Saturday night with a guy named Jeff who is 24. He was very cute and very sweet. We talked a lot - I like him. I saw Mitch this morning - I think we may be able to be friends, but nothing more (see private entry). I am down to 176 so that is a 135 pound loss.
22 - Josh called me Sunday afternoon. JOSH.. from January 6 entry and the reason I started my personal entries if I am not mistaken. We met for drinks and talked for 3 hours. He told me he tried to find my house again and got so lost. He went back to the bar we met and spent so much money and drank so slow hoping I would walk in again. He finally went to Judy's house and asked her for my phone number. He said the sweetest things and said that he missed me and thought about me so much and wondered what I thought of him. He said he wanted to be my "everything" and didn't like hearing I have seen other people. That sorta scares me! I saw Mitch (my trash man) this morning. I still like Mitch the VERY best. I got a picture of him and one of the best hugs I have ever had in my life! (see private entry).
As far as upcoming surgery goes.... Carolyn is flying out from Oregon for 2 weeks to take care of me. She is so completely awesome! I am trying to figure out if I want to trade in my car and what to do about my future financial situation. I also rear ended someone today so my whole front end is messed up. I also fell off the stool in the kitchen tonight and hurt my elbow on the tile floor. I could take just a tad less excitement for a little while. :-)
30 - Josh called me Friday night and said he REALLY wanted to see me. I went to pick him up and we talked alot. He said he can't stop thinking about me and how that is NOT a good thing. He is falling too hard for me. Its weird hearing him say the same things to me that I want to say to Mitch, but can't. It makes me realize how he must feel though, which is very touching. (see private entry).
Rob called me Sunday night. Rob, motocross Rob, who calls once a month to tug at my strings! He came over and we talked alot.:-) (MM# 13 see private entry)
I started taking Wellbutrin Saturday. Saturday I was talking to my friend Steve E. and some things he and I said really made me stop and think about how I have no right to be depressed and it really boosted my mood. Sunday, I got tons accomplished around the house and felt very possitive. I also talked to an old friend Alex (Dan's friend) and he got me pumped about getting into realestate investing. I spent Monday with Aunt Adelia and two of her friends and took them to Red Rock and Valley of Fire. They had a great time. All-in-all, this was a pretty fantastic weekend that really lifted my spirits up! :-)
