But anywhoo, Jeeves was looking suspicious today. He had a small tangerine in his pocket, but oh no, he didnt tell anyone.
"Hey Jeeves, do you happen to have a tangerine or a large satsuma i could borrow?" One-eared Mick asked benevolently. "i hear the careers advisor is coming to school today and i want to throw one at him."
"hmmmm... i havnt got one," he shouted. Jeeves was furious that someone had stolen his idea so he jabbed mick in the face with a small box of staplers.
"errrr... i advise you to get a career, wot more can i say" whistled the careers advisor angrily as he was hit in the face with a stapler.
He took Jeeves to one side. "What du wana do kid, what du wana do? tell me your dreams."
"I wana be a space astronaught, go into outer space and discover things that have never been discovered."
He said "Look you're British, so scale it down a bit alright."
"alright, i wana work in a shoe shop.." jeeves sighed, "..and discover shoes that noone's ever discovered... right at the back of the shop... on the left"
and he said "Look you're British, so scale it down a bit alright."
"Alright i wana work in a sewer then..!" he admitted. "...and discover sewage that noones ever discovered... and pile it on my head... and then come to the surface and sell myself to an art gallery."
He said "What the fu(k have you been smokin eh? You certainly havnt been smoking in a bar in california..."
Because you can't!
Jeeves had given up listening to the careers advisor. He was getting sponsored for it and everything. in total i think he raised just over 3500 pounds. All the monkey went to charity. Of course you think ive made a typo, but thats impossible. Jeeves had in fact raised a really fat monkey who weighed 3500 pounds. They lived together, 'just the two of them, they can make it if they try, just the two of them, you and i...' they also sang in a band which appeared on 'Stars in your eyes'. Tonight matthew im going to be...... bumming a big fat monkey. The show was never aired. ahwell. The careers advisor later died of food poisoning, may he rest in peas. I've got to write a story in Russia, so moscow xxxx
