| 5:14pm Chester, as Pearlman, ran to the quad to start interviewing students. However, not wanting to cause panic, he couldn't mention the stolen water. This made questioning difficult. "Hey, man," he'd begin. "Hey, Pearlman, what's up?" says random student. "Not much, how are you?" he interrogates. "I'm Ok" "That's cool." Clearly this isn't gonna go anywhere, he thought. So Pearlman changed back into Chester, who could blend in better and ask more pertinent questions without arousing suspicion. Also, Chester decided to start by questioning his friends, on the 6th flood Blues, because, unlike the rest of the campus, they were perceptive. The average AU Student on the other hand is dumb as dirt. On his way back, Chester eyed every squirrel suspiciously, waiting for it to make it's move. But none did. It was almost as if they were...organized. Once in the dorm, Chester encounters his good friends Alanna Banana and Toddesha, who were sitting in the lounge with Anders and Adrienne. "Doooooooooooooooooooooooooooood, did you hear about the water?" Chester yells. "Yeah, that's ridiculous," said Alanna Banana. "I hate people," said Toddesha. "Yeah, I definitely need to find out about this. Will y'all help me?" Chester asked. "Of course," Alanna Banana and Toddesha replied (in unison). Toddesha went down to her wing to talk to her neighbors, Dan and Jason. As she walks down the hall, she sees Jason coming out of his room. "Jason! Hey, have you heard about this water thing?" she asked. "Yeah, I think it's ridiculous." "So what've you heard about it?" "Well, besides that it - hold on, I have to take this call," he said as his cell phone rang. In the meantime, Toddesha walked over to Dan, who was sitting on the couch, reading the paper. "Hey, Dan, hae you heard about this water crisis?" Dan bent the corner of the paper and peered at her. "Excuse me?" "Yeah, all the water on campus is gone." "That's odd." "And you haven't heard anything?" "Nope," he said, shaking his head. "Are you sure?" "Are you?" he said. "Ok, thanks, Dan" "Yup," he said, returning to his paper. Toddesha turned her attention back to Jason, who was still pacing. Using his dry erase board (and some charades), they had a lovely chat, but Toddesha learned that he knew as little about it as she did. In another hallway, Alanna Banana was questioning Tony and Garrison, who are roommates. Tony was standing uncomfortably close, talking about how much better Florida was than Russia. "But do you know who took it?" Alanna Banana asked, exasperated. "Hey, you know what's good?" said Garrison. "That VitaminWater they sell down in the Eagle's Nest." "Yeah, I like that strawberry banana kind," said Tony. "Ew, strawberry banana? That's gay, dude," said Garrison, with mock disgust. "Man, you're gay," he said. And then they tackled each other and rolled around in a not-at-all homoerotic manor. "You know what? You're both fools," Alanna Banana said, giving up. Meahwhile, Chester was in the lounge, chatting with Shannon and Tiffany. "Hey, what's up?" he said as he entered the room. "Not much, just making some ramen," Shannon answered. "Yeah, but something's wrong with the faucet," said Tiffany, as she stood up from under the sink, holding the wrench. "Yeah, I heard that all the water on campus was stolen," said Chester, looking at both of them, waiting for a response. However, neither of them answered, as they were both giggling. "Haha, you look like that guy from Home Improvement," said Shannon. Confused, Chester chuckled and said "What??" Tiffany playfully stared down the still-giggling Shannon. "Just because I"m handy around the dorm..." At the word "handy," both girls cracked up, confusing Chester to no end as he watched their banter and unexplained, uncontrollable laughter. So he just backed out of the room. Chester, Toddesha, and Alanna Banana reconvened in the hallway. "Let's go to Scralanna's room," said Chester, and they walked down the hall to assess the situation. "Ok, as far as I can tell, everyone here is a freaking idiot," said Alanna Banana. "Indeed," said Toddesha "Fact: everyone in Blues Hall is a freaking idiot," said Anders as he passed them on his way down the hall. "I don't know what we can do next," said Chester thoughtfully, as he paced in front of the window. He turned slightly to talk to them. "What do you call someone who has information that will lead us to the culprits?" "I dunno, what?" said Toddesha. "Some dude," said Chester. "So I guess we should keep looking, huh?" said Alanna Banana. Chester nodded and glanced out the window. Something caught his eye: a squirrel carrying a Brita. Boomsause, he said to himself, smiling. Finally, he had something to go on. With that he was out the door on his way to chase down the squirrel (but stopping to change back into his Pearlman disguise, for dramatic effect). Next Previous The Adventures of Pearlman |