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| January 1st Hello and welcome to the new year. Let me introduce myself. I am the new Tracey. The Tracey from last year has ceased to exist and this coming year is the one in which I reinvent myself. There will be remnants of the old Tracey, but I intend to amplfy my good qualities and diminish the bad. To do this, I have compiled a list of new years resolutions. I am officially documenting them so that next year, I can look back and congratulate myself on sticking to them. 1. Move out of the stinkin house. Life begins when you leave the nest, and I can't wait for life to start. Before I move out, there are some essentials I need to purchase (such as a computer) and I don't want to put a strict deadline on moving out (other than it will be this year). Once I have acquired the necessities, good-bye Delta Cable - helllo Shaw employee cable plan! 2. Get over Glen. Wow such a simple 3 word sentence right? While so far the application of this sentence has been cruelly difficult, I decided that I am leaving my relationship with him in 2001 where it belongs. In 2002, Glen will remain one of my closest friends. Someone that I would do anything for, except wait for his love to return. Yesterday I told Glen that I loved him, and I meant it. As of this moment, that love is strictly platonic. Silently, I have said my good-bye, and over the next few months, I hope that Glen will see the change within me, and that he will open himself up to a strong, life-long friendship with a girl he once loved. 3. Pursue my music further. Thanks to Glen I now have 3 things: a good microphone for recording music on my computer, Sound Forge for mixing my music, and the inspiration to follow my musical dreams and take them to the next level. Within the next year sometime, I hope to have gained the courage necessary to start performing my music in public (such as in coffee shops etc), and to actually complete the CD that I have been working towards for the past 2 years. With these resolutions in mind, I forge ahead into the great unknown, whispering solemn good-byes, steadying my feet on my tumultuous past, and preparing myself for greatness. January 7th What a week!!! In 7 days, my life has drastically changed. Ok, maybe not drastically but there are some differences that should definitely be noted. FIrst, let's check the progress on those New Year's resolutions. 1. Move out of the house. Well this is definitely a serious goal of mine, so I took the first steps and talked to a financial advisor on Friday morning. We set some goals, and though he advised me that I should stay at home as long as I can without paying rent, I decided against that advice. I still fully intended on moving out in the early part of the year into an apartment in New West or Burnaby. Then, on Saturday, a simple decision to have Glen leave the Georgia Straight on my desk to read changed everything. While flipping through the Straight, I noticed an ad for loftsvancouver.com. Since ideally I would love to move into a loft, I thought I'd check out the site. After I perused that site for a while, I searched Google for other sites about lofts in Vancouver, and found a gem. c2c-lofts.com was listing new lofts for sale in New West, and suddenly, I had a new dream. My new vision is to get a mortgage and purchase a loft in New West and live happily ever after (or something to that effect). Specifically, loft 404. Check out http://c2c-lofts.com to take a look at the floor plan of this lovely loft. So, today I got in touch with a family friend who is in the real estate business and he is going to look into things for me. The ball is rolling. I'd say that this resolution is in pretty good shape for 7 days into the year!! 2. Get over Glen Isn't it shocking what a difference 7 days makes? Or, for that matter, 7 hours? On New Year's Eve, a conversation with Glen changed my entire outlook on my love life. There was nothing said that hadn't been said before, but for some reason, I was finally ready to listen. I've made some bad decisions this year, and one seemingly less than favourable decision ended up opening the door for me to let Glen go. After silently saying my good-bye to Glen at about 4:00pm on New Year's Eve, I was uplifted and ready to move forward. I turned a love into a friend, and then hours later, turned a friend into a possible love. It may seem shocking to some that I am now involved in a relationship, but it is something that I definitely want and am looking forward to letting grow. Over the next while, you should hear many mentions on this site to my new boyfriend, Aran. I've spent most of the week hanging out with him and his friends, and my friends (including Glen) and I know that I have not been this happy in months. 3. Pursue my music further. Geez did you not read what else I already did this week??!?!?!? What, do you think I'm superwoman or something??? ONE THING AT A TIME!!! That's all for now.... will keep you posted...... January 16th Yesterday was a pretty emotional day for me. I got up (late) to find an email from Stewart in my inbox. I was in a rush, so I didn't have too much time to think about it, but when I arrived at work, there were emails there from both Stewart and Laura. It was definitely a surprise to hear from them (especially both in the same day) but definitely a pleasant surprise. I had basically given in to the fact that I had lost them as friends, and now it seems that is not the case. We talked over email a bit, I found out from Laura that they have all read my site, which again is a surprise, but I guess once you put something on the internet, people are bound to see it eventually. I'm not angry about it, there is nothing on here that I wouldn't tell them if they wanted to know, but it was just unexpected. For a few moments in the afternoon, my emotions were a complete rollercoaster. Back in December, I had accepted the loss of good friends, and now having them come back to me suddenly was more than I was emotionally ready to handle. I was so worried that they were just going to email me to confirm that they were indeed no longer my friends, and when I realized that was not the case, tears literally welled up in my eyes. I had surpressed the emotions of losing these people for over a month, and suddenly all the emotions decided to surface. I was in the middle of a conversation with Glen and literally had to walk away and pull myself together in the women's washroom. I needed to talk it over with someone, so I went on my lunch break with Glen, but by that time, my emotions were in check, and we ended up spending the majority of my break talking about other things. Later that evening, I decided to call Laura. We had left things pretty open in our email, but I think she was still surprised to hear from me. There was some awkwardness in the beginning of our conversation, and I'll admit when I called I really wasn't sure how I was feeling about everything. It was nice to hear her voice again. After a few minutes of talking, I could no longer surpress how much I truly care about Laura. I look forward to rekindling our friendship. So in the end, it appears that the only person I am not going to have friendship with is Catherine. I guess I was naive to think that it was possible to begin with, but I still think it sucks. The entire time I have known Catherine, I have genuinely liked her, and though I have been jealous of her relationship with Glen at times, I never had any negative feelings towards her, and still don't. In years, what I will choose to remember is how she supported me when Glen and I broke up, and how she was the first one to wish me a happy 21st birthday. In other news... let's check on those resolutions. 1. Moving out Well I went to see those lofts last Thursday with Aran, and did I say loft 404?? I meant loft 406! It's the bomb. However, there are a few drawbacks to the lofts. Resale value for one, and the fact that the loft bedroom ceilings are a little low. I can't remember what they were in the two lofts I liked, but in some of them, there were beams which lowered to a height of 5'10. Aran is only 5'7, so he could stand in there comfortably, but there are many guys I know that would be hitting their heads if they went up there. So unless I never intend on inviting over Jeremy, Glen, and Glenn (among others), the low ceilings would be a problem. But the dream is still alive! Mark my words, I WILL be buying a place to live this year. Oh, and I have a meeting with my mortgage broker this Friday. 2. Get over Glen Instead of referring to this resolution as getting over Glen, from now on, I am going to use this space to reflect on my relationship with Aran. There may be instances of Glen in coming paragraphs, but as I am no longer actively head over heels in love with Glen, talking about the degree to which I am over him seems irrelevant. So let's talk about Aran. I felt bad yesterday because I went over to his place after work, and I was so emotionally and physically drained that I could barely have a serious conversation about anything. But the last week has been good. I really enjoy spending time with him, either alone or with friends. And Aran and Glen get along great - it's very important to me that they do, because I don't want to have to separate them and have to circles of friends. So yay! On a completely (well almost completely) irrelevant note, there are interviews being held at work this week, so every day, some guys at work are all dressed up in their shirts and ties. And damn, they look hot! It definitely improves the work environment a certain degree when there are GQs walking around all day. 3. Pursue my music Well it's a small step but I gave my rough CD to a couple guys at work, and Blake is going to help me record cleaner versions of my music, and Bill is supposedly going to make me famous. Sweet. That's all for now, gotta go to work. January 21st Been a while since I updated, but I've been pretty busy. Rebecca came over last Wednesday after work and we decided to dye our hair. After a long debate in Save On Foods (gotta love Ladner - it was the only thing that was open past 10), we both ended up picking the same Herbal Essences red hair colour. We figured it would be safe because our hair was different before we dyed it so it shouldn't look the same afterwards. We got back to my place just after midnight, and started the procedure. We were trying to be quiet since my parents were sleeping in the next room, but we were making such a mess. It was like we forgot we had hair dye all over our gloved hands. We'd spill a bit, but in the process of trying to clean it up, we'd make a bigger mess. Once our heads were covered in purple dye, we tried some more to clean up and were dismayed to discover that the dye was not coming off the cupboards with water. We rummaged around under the sink for a bit, and Becca thought to try nail polish remover, and voila! Mess be gone. However, 25 minutes later, the mess grew again (quarantined to the bathtub though). As we rinsed, the bathtub filled up with purple water. I have the pictures to prove it (and will post when they are developed - sorry no digital). After we rinsed the dye out, we moved our ruckous downstairs to blow dry. Our original plan to watch a couple movies was lost, but we still had a blast. A noisy, messy one, but a blast nonetheless. I did jack shit on Thursday. I went straight home to bed. Friday I had an appointment with my mortgage broker at 10:30 in the morning, and was pleasantly surprised to learn that I actually got approved for a mortgage - and in a higher amount than I had aniticipated. Add that to the progress on my moving out of the house resolution! I've got lots of time to shop (my rate is guaranteed until mid April), so yipee skippy I'm actually gonna have a place to live one day! Maybe I'll build a black picket fence. After work on Friday, Aran, Ngaire and myself went to see theatresports. They performed a skit that lasted an hour, which was quite unique. As always, I had a good time. I got to sleep in on Saturday, which was quite nice. I rolled out of bed around 12:30 or so, and called to make plans with Aran to see Vanilla Sky that afternoon. I took my sweet time getting ready, and we ended up meeting at the theatre because we were running late. For those who are curious, the car Tom Cruise drives in the first scene is a Ferarri. He drives a Mustang for the rest of the movie. After the movie, Aran had to go pick up Becca and Sam, so I went back to Aran's place and waited with Glenn and Tim until everyone was ready to go to dinner. The wait was too long at The Keg ( as per a telephone call), so we all went to Milestone's for dinner. We were running a little late, so we didn't make it to Malones until about 9:30pm (the original plan was 8:30 or 9). We hung out at Malone's for a while, but it was snowing quite heavily, so Aran and I left just before midnight. The snow prevented Aran's car from making it all the way home, so we parked the car a half block away from the house and walked the rest of the way. My shoes weren't really build for walking in the snow, and it took much effort from myself and Aran to make sure my ass or face didn't end up planted in the icy white evil on the ground. We were dripping wet when we got back to Aran's but we hung out and dried off until about 1, when Becca, Chris, Eric, Sam, and Matt arrived back at the house. It was around that time that I was going to head home because I was really tired, but Aran convinced me that would probably not be a good idea because of the weather. After debating (arguing?) over my driving abilities for almost half an hour, Aran won, and I called my parents to let them know I was stranded. 2 minutes later, Glenn, Deanna and Tim got home after pushing Deanna's car some of the way home. It seems Aran was right after all. We then began the discussion of what we were going to do about my contact lenses, because I didn't have any contact solution with me. We ended up putting them in a dish with water. By morning, the slightly blue tint on the contacts had turned green. That can't be good. My eyes ached when I put them in (and in case you're wondering, I had to spit on them first. Ew), and around 12:30, we left to the adventure of getting our cars out of the snow. They had cleared the street, so after kicking the surrounding snow out of the way of our tires, and cleaning the rest of the snow off the windshields, we both were able to drive away comfortably. Aran headed to dialysis, and I went home. When I got there, I took my contacts out, and (though they had turned back to their blue tinted colour) I threw them in the garbage and got some new ones. It was probably about time to chuck them anyway (they're disposable). I chatted with my parents and sister for a bit, then went upstairs to take a short nap before going out to a movie with Rebecca and Chris. We saw The Shipping News. It was pretty good - different than most Kevin Spacey films, and different from most Lasse Hallstrom films (he directed The Cider House Rules, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, My Life as a Dog, Chocolat....). It started off kinda depressing but it was still good. Kevin Spacey rules. After the movie, I raced to Safeway to buy stuff for dinner (it was before 10, so it was still open), then went home and started making fajitas. Aran arrived shortly after that, and we had dinner with my parents and then sat down to watch a movie. We watched Don't Say a Word, and I remembered why I chose Brittany Murphy as a Best Supporting Actress on my Top Ten. Aran left after the movie, and I just hung out, did some e-com work, watched tv and then went to bed. Oh I also played my guitar, and chopped off all my nails. I slept in again today and did some e-com work before getting ready to go to work. I'll probably do some more when I get home (after watching my recorded Boston Public of course). I've been looking online at places to buy and should probably give my real estate agent a call in the next couple days as well. This week is gonna be busy. Good thing I cut my claws off. Another thing I'd like to mention is that The Golden Globes were on last night. What a joke. Some of the winners I completely disagree with, others I can understand (though they are not really what I would have chosen) but there isn't one that I think "yes, that was definitely the right decision" Oh wait, Gene Hackman for Best Actor in a comedy was right, but one out of how many? Come on!. It used to be that the Globes were less "hollywood", that true art was rewarded by the Golden Globes and shunned by the Academy, but this year, the Hollywood Foreign Press seems to have jumped on the bandwagon. Did anyone watch these films or shows before awarding the winners? Or did they just think "well Russell was really good in the Insider, so I'm sure he's great in A Beautiful Mind - let's give it to him". For a full list of what exactly has pissed me off, I will post a Golden Globes page. January 24th Thank God it's Thursday. I know this doesn't really mean anything, but it's one step closer to Friday, so that makes me happy. The newsletter goes out today, so that means I don't have to work today or tomorrow (not for Rogers at least), so I should be a little more relaxed than I was earlier this week. I got an email from Calvin yesterday (well technically the night before), and guess what!?!? Monica (his wife) is pregnant! So Calvin is going to be a daddy some time in late August this year. I just want to send out a big congratulations to the both of them - they are going to make wonderful parents. Looks like after a couple years of delay, I can't put it off any longer. I will be taking a vacation this summer to Calgary to see them and the baby. I promised Calvin I would, and now I will put it in writing (kinda). I PROMISE TO GO TO CALGARY THIS SUMMER. Calvin is also planning a trip out here sometime this February, so that'll be good to see him. We also talked a bit about my music, and Calvin might help me out there and get me some gigs (scary eh?) so I am going to add that discussion onto my list of things I have done to further my musical new years resolution. We will talk more about it when he comes down in February though. But where a new life begins, sadly, another life generally ends, so I would like to take a moment ot mention the passing of Chris' grandfather last week, and the passing of Greg and Lauren's cat Merlin. My heart goes out to all of you. January 26th I stopped by Rogers head office yesterday to pick up a cheque, and ended up running into quite a few of my old coworkers. It was really nice to see everyone and catch up with them, and despite the stuff that has happened over the past couple months, I felt really welcome being there. As much as I love my current work environment, there are definitely some differences. The major difference between the environments is that at Rogers, there was a very small tight-knit group of people, and at Shaw, there are a lot of us, and some people's names I still don't even know. There are definite benefits to both environments, and I would be lying if I said I didn't miss what I had with the team at Rogers. Thankfully, it looks like they are still going to be in my life, so I'll retain my closeness with them - just outside of the work environment. Laura and I are going out next Tuesday and I'm really looking forward to that. On the down side of things, I had a fever yesterday and have been plagued with chills for the last 2 days. If I get a cold, I will be so pissed off! I am going out tonight with the e-com team to dinner and theatresports to celebrate the launching of the new site format. Check it out here. Til next time. Be cool, stay in school. January 29th The Friday outing with my Rogers e-com group was really fun. The St.Valentine's Day Massacre is running at theatresports right now (read about it here) and I really enjoyed the tournament last year, so it was no surprise that I enjoyed the show on Friday. Also, I had to save my coworkers from embarassment, so since none of the other audience members volunteered when they asked, I got up on stage and performed someone's hand and arm movements for a scene. And I got free tickets out of the deal! Woo hooo! I love free theatresports tickets. It was snowing pretty heavily on Friday night, so I went straight home after the show was over. I slept in pretty late on Saturday, then got ready and went over to Aran's place to meet him for dinner with his parents. A group of us (me, Aran, Becca, Chris, Jeremy, Aran's parents and Aran's grandparents) went to dinner at Amarosa's (a really nice Italian restaurant) for Aran's birthday (which was actually at the beginning of January, so this was a little belated). After dinner, we went to Barfly (sans the parents and grandparents) for a while, but took off just before midnight. When we got out of the club, it was snowing heavily again, so we slowly but surely made it back to Aran and Jer's place, and I was once again stranded for the evening. I had anticipated it this time, so I actually had my contact stuff on me, so I wasn't all that upset about it. Aran was a total sweetheart and ran me a hot bath to warm up in, and then after the 4 of us (Becca had gone home) watched the first 20 minutes of Gone in 60 Seconds, we all got pretty tired and went to bed. I spent most of the day Sunday cleaning about a foot of snow off my car. Ok, so I didn't really spend most of the day doing it, but I had to do that in the morning before we could do anything else. After the car was cleaned off, I drove Aran to dialysis, and Chris and I went to see Black Hawk Down at Tinseltown. It was actually a bit better than I had anticipated. There was no love story in it, it was purely a war-drama, so I was quite happy with that. I wouldn't say it's a best picture contender or anything, but I enjoyed it. After the movie, we went and picked Aran up from dialysis, then I took them home, and went home myself. I watched the movie Rat Race with my parents (which was quite funny), then went to bed because I had to work at 7 in the morning. I was late for work Monday morning. Aran called me around 6:15am because he didn't have a way to get to work. So I went and picked him up, and drove him to work with me. After work, we hung out at his place for a bit (I took a nice nap) and then headed to the theatre to meet Jeremy to watch The Count of Monte Cristo. It was really good. Jim Caviezel rules the school. And Guy Pearce is a very talented hottie. I had never read the book, but I still really enjoyed the story. There were some minor editing issues, and Dantes signs something with his left hand (when it is well known that people weren't alllowed to write with their left hand until about 20-25 years ago) but aside from that, the movie was very good. I went home after the movie and went to bed. One more day of work, then I get another weekend!! Yipeeeeeeeeeee. I have some errands/chores to do on my days off. I am writing them here so I cannot procrastinate. 1. Do laundry 2. Go shopping to replace stuff lost in car break-in 3. Call my real estate agent 4. Call Chevy and ask them when the hell my car door will be fixed. 5. Book appointment for car service. 6. Go to the bank. I think that's really all I have to do, but if I think of anything else... I'll just procrastinate on those things. January 31st 1. Do laundry.... check! 2. Go shopping to replace stuff lost in car break-in...... 99% check (still have to buy track pants) 3. Call my real estate agent.... check (and another check for getting listings from him and looking at them) 4. Call Chevy and ask them when the hell my car door will be fixed..... mmm check for calling but Chevy gets no check for their vast lack of information. 5. Book appointment for car service.... check 6. Go to the bank..... check, but have to go to the bank again because I now have another cheque to deposit. My two days off were quite productive. On top of these chores, I also cleaned my car (inside only), watched several movies (which I will discuss in further detail lower down on the page), and got my hair cut. I do not remember the last time I had two quite as productive days. So here we go with the movies. Tuesday - I am Sam This was quite a touching movie, and Sean Penn's performance was really great. Michelle Pfieffer was also really good, playing a rather nasty character - turned good, and I would really like to commend the performance of Dakota Fanning - the young girl who played Sam's daughter. She is a total cutie and really talented. I look forward to watching her career (let's just hope she doesn't get ruined by the industry). I would recommend I am Sam if you're looking for a touching drama. Wednesday - The Mothman Prophecies and A Beautiful Mind The Mothman Prophecies was quite disappointing actually. If I for a second believed that the story actually is based on true events, I still would not find it chilling because there are other ways the film could have been done that would make it better and scarier. It was incredibly predictable and on a whole, I felt it was pretty silly. A Beautiful Mind - as much as I was totally geared up to dislike this film, I just couldn't do it. The preview for the movie does no justice on what the film is actually about so it was quite a pleasant surprise. While it was good though, I am not going to modify my top ten list at all to fit it it - I thought it was great, but I still think that other films are much more deserving of an Oscar nomination or win, or even a Golden Globe. And yes Russell Crowe was good in this movie, but I don't think he should win any more awards because, let's face it - they gave him an Oscar last year when he didn't deserve it, so they should just overlook him now that he does. (and I'm not bitter... really...). But I will recommend A Beautiful Mind - go see it - it is a great movie. Well that basically covers what I did on my days off. I saw Jessica on Wednesday - she is nice and tanned from her trip to Mexico. And I hung out with Kristina on Thursday. Kristina's hair is now significantly longer than mine. I also saw Laura on Tuesday - we went out for dinner and it was a nice surprise to see that we can still talk to each other for hours, and completely open up to one another. I look forward to seeing her again soon. But for now I must get my ass to bed because I have a nice weekend of early mornings ahead of me. |