Ai No Corrida

By Zaen

CHAPTER FOUR

The next time you saw Justin was at Joey’s wedding. It was a tense reunion; the four of you were still reeling from Justin’s announcement at Challenge in July. You were surprised he actually showed up—even more surprised that he brought his bodyguard as a date instead of Cameron. You were both pissed and thrilled. You two made small talk, but mostly Justin kept to himself. Before you left you made a point to say goodbye to Justin, and gave him a small hug.

“Are you still mad at me, like everyone else?”

“Justin, this is Joey’s day.”

“Can’t we talk about this?” he whispered before you ended your hug.

“Not here.”

“When? You never come to see me.”

“That’s because you’re always with—Justin, don’t you ever think of anyone but yourself? Have you ever considered coming to see me?”

“Yeah, but…but…”

“I’ve gotta go, J.”

It was the first time you walked away from him instead of the other way around. You looked back, and saw him watching you. You knew you wouldn’t be able to stay mad at him for long.

~~*~~

Less than 2 weeks later, Justin showed up at your studio for the first time. You never felt so nervous. He sat in your swivel chair and smirked as you tripped over your feet and pushed buttons and tried to explain the little bits of songs and beats that you had so far. You must have been babbling for a while, because suddenly Justin leaned over and covered your mouth with his hand.

“JC, enough.”

“But, this one isn’t really finished. I’m thinking of changing the tempo—”

“I like it, ok?”

“Oh. You do?”

“Yeah, man.” Officially you didn’t care what Justin or anyone else thought about your music, as long as you were satisfied. But you couldn’t help smiling when Justin nodded his head in time to your stuff.

“I heard through the grapevine that you’re gonna start working on your sophomore solo record, too,” you said to Justin’s feet. Justin shrugged and swiveled around.

“Oh yeah? Well, I heard through the grapevine that you’ve been dating someone for a while now.” Justin cleared his throat and looked at his fingernails. “A woman.”

“Mmm.” You wanted to think that it was a smidgen of jealousy that drew Justin’s mouth up into a smirk, but you knew better. “That’s right.”

“Actress?”

You coughed. “Uh huh.”

“But you don’t want to date actresses.” Justin looked at you pointedly. “You’ve said so on many occasions that you think actresses are fake and—”
“You’ve said things on many occasions, too,” you interrupted, eyes on your feet. “Things I’ve let slide. Things the four of us have let slide, so don’t even start—”

“Ok, ok, C. Forget it.” Justin swiveled around, and for a second you feared that he would leave. “Do you…uh…like her?”

“She’s sweet. And sexy. We have a good time together.”

“But she’s a woman,” Justin said calmly.

“You’re dating a woman,” you snapped.

“Yeah, but I’m not…not—”

“Not what, Justin?”

“Nothing.”

“No, tell me what you’re not that I am, Justin!” you snapped. If he was going to pull that I’m not gay, I’m just experimenting card, you were going to punch him, you just knew it. Instead, Justin merely looked at you, sighed, and shook his head.

“Forget it, C. Nevermind.” He glanced at you and then looked out into space. “If you’re happy, then I’m happy for you.” He smiled weakly. It made you a little sad. “So, yeah, I think I’m gonna start on the next album soon.”

“Uh huh.” This time last year you thought you’d all be working on Nsync’s fifth album, but you didn’t want to fight. Not today. Not when Justin came to see you for a change. “Well, then. Good. I’m sure it’ll be…um…yeah. Got anything yet?”

“Well, there’s something I’ve been rolling around in my head.” Justin smiled shyly and slipped a DAT into your console. Some slow beats filled the air. It sounded very raw, but had a lot of potential, like it was intentionally sparse. Justin turned to you and bit his lip.

“JC. Would you like to do this with me?”

“Sure,” you answered, trying your best to sound blasé. This was a first, since the hiatus anyway. Justin never liked to share in the studio. He got that from you. “What do you want me to do, J?”

“Just, uh, come here. Please.” Justin had you stand in front of him, between his legs. You waited as he fiddled with this and that on the boards. You felt suddenly very nervous. It had been months since you two were alone together, and things between you were tense to say the least.

“J?”

“Shhh, just a second.” Justin stood up and leaned in to whisper in your ear. “Are you expecting anyone down here for a while?”

“N-no, Justin,” you uttered with a gulp.

“Good.” It wasn’t until he kissed you that you realized just how long it had been since the last time you felt his lips on yours, or his tongue in your mouth, or his hands around your waist. Somehow he tasted different. You wanted to keep kissing him deep and wet, until you knew where this new flavor came from. But Justin was sliding down to his knees before you could even ask for more.

“J, what are you doing?”

“Mmm…you said we’d be alone.”

“But…but…oh.”

“You still mad at me, C?” he whispered as he kissed your penis. “Huh, baby? Still mad at me?”

“Yes.”

“C’mon, C. Don’t be mad…don’t be mad.”

Maybe Justin’s kiss had changed, but his aptitude for giving head hadn’t. He always could get you to come fast with his mouth, no matter how much you begged him to slow down.

“Justin. Oh.”

“Don’t be mad at me anymore.” He licked his lips like a chocoholic on Halloween. “You know it’s not personal.”

“Really…oh.” He smirked at you and slid two fingers behind your balls.

“Thatttts rigggtthhh. We all…neeedth…more time…away frommmff…Nnnsyyynccuh.” Talking with his mouth full was your trick.

“No…you needed it. We didn’t. You wanted…oh, fuck. Ah. You wanted more time away. From us. From me.” Justin stopped just as he was getting you to the brink. He frowned at you as he let your cock slip from his mouth.

“That’s not it and you know it,” he growled as he stood up, his wet palm already replacing his mouth and working fast.

“Justin…oh.”

“It’s been too long, C,” he grunted as he pushed you down on the console. The knobs and controls crunched into your back, but you barely noticed as you watched Justin pull his shirt off and pull his cock out of his pants. It excited you, watching him stroke himself for you.

“You have any—”

“Yeah, just…almost,” he whispered as he fumbled with your pants and his at the same time. With each passing second your realized how much you missed this, and how eager you were for Justin to be inside you again, even with a bunch of annoying knobs digging into your back, even with the weirdness between you two. Justin had condoms and a small tube in his baggy pants pocket all along, which kind of made you feel special and easy at the same time. Justin knew you so well.

“C’mon…c’mon.” The wantonness in your voice surprised you. Justin was breathing fast as he worked the tube open with one hand and pushed you on your back with the other.

“Get your legs up, C.”

“Oh, God.” Justin leaned over to kiss you, and he kept kissing you even when you cried out at his finger’s invasion. It’d been so long since you’d had him. “J…mph…now.”

“Mmm, kissing you now.”

“Justin.” You stroked his face, then slipped your hand down fast to spread the clear gel all over his latex-covered erection. He smiled gratefully at you. “Justin…you…mmm…you taste different.”

“You taste different too…but still delicious as ever.”

“Baby, you’re so, so, soooooo!!!” His eyes had distracted you, and the penetration surprised you. You cried out happily as he slowly sank into your body.

It was awkward at first, and you kept slipping down. It was frustrating for you, but Justin merely pushed you up harder against the mixing boards and bent you further at the waist.

“Talk to me,” he huffed as he rode you slowly. He reached for something, and you started to panic that he was stopping so soon. Then he grinned and brought a microphone closer to your face. “Talk to me, JC.”

“What do you want me to…mpphh…ohhh. Justin. You taste so good.”

“You’re so delicious, baby. So…so hungry for you, C. You…oh, God.”

You let him flip you onto your belly and take you from behind. You grabbed at the sound controls in a vain effort to latch on to something, and Justin laughed at the result coming through the speakers.

“Ohhh, sweetie. JC. So good.”

“Yes.”

Justin turned a few knobs, still fucking you mercilessly, and you groaned in time to the music. Justin held you and sang along with you. You harmonized for a while, and then laughed so hard he almost slipped out. He fixed his cock back inside you, and you sang together again.

“Louder, C. I want to hear you.”

“Oh. Oh!”

“You ok, baby?”

You squeezed Justin with your body, and kissed him when he wailed and dug his fingers into your hips.

You were back on your back, your legs aching, barely able to hold yourself up anymore, Justin still inside you, when your eyes locked and Justin gasped, “I love…fucking you. I love it, C.”

“I love it, too,” you whispered, and then he came inside you with a gasp. You held him as he shook, and tried not to feel too sad.

Justin rested on top of you for a few seconds, and then he was down on his knees, taking you into his mouth. You begged for his fingers, and he gave you three because he knew that 3 was the magic number for you. You cried loudly and trembled when you came, but Justin held tight, not stopping fingerfucking you or swallowing you until you were calm again.

You hissed when you moved off the boards. Justin turned you, looked at your back, and hissed, too.

“Baby.” He peeled you off the console inch by inch, and massaged the tiny red welts the buttons left on your skin. “Poor JC,” he whispered as he kissed all over your back and your ass.

“I guess I’m irresistible,” you tried to say facetiously, but you were still too high to make it sound convincing. Justin held you close, his fingers soft on your flaming back.

“You are, JC. I can’t hold back when I’m with you.” Justin smiled bashfully. “Anyway…um, are these your boxers or mine?”

You dressed quickly, and pretended not to notice Justin watching you. When you finished you stretched and rubbed your sore ass. Justin laughed and stuffed the DAT into his bag.

“What are you gonna do with that?”

“Nevermind,” Justin whispered. He finished tying his sneakers and gazed at you. “Come here, JC.” You took the 3 steps to him. He stood up slowly, and looked down at you with that look he always gave you before disappearing from your life for weeks or months. “JC. Next time I see you, I…” Justin touched your collarbone, just a finger’s length to the right of the ever-present pendant at your throat. It startled you; you’d just been so intimate, but this simple gesture—something he’d done from time to time even when he was a teenager—inexplicably made your knees go weak. “Next time, I want you inside me. No matter where we are, or who we’re with, I want you in me. Promise me, C.”

You barely uttered, “Promise.”

“I mean it, JC. Because, well, before today, how long has it been since we’ve hooked up?” Justin asked breathily.

“About three months.”

“How long since…” Justin pulled you firmly against him and made you look into his eyes. “Since we…fucked?” Before you could think, Justin blurted out, “Ten months.” His cheeks reddened a little. “Ten months and two weeks, C. That’s too fucking long to go without you, baby.”

“Too damn long.” You kissed and hoped he couldn’t tell that you were trembling.

“I can’t believe it’s been so long. I need you, C. I don’t care where we are.” Justin kissed you, inhaled the soft, short breaths you were having trouble taking all of a sudden. “I don’t care if we don’t have condoms…or lube…or a bed…or a desk. I just want you to take me,” he whispered.

“Y-yes. I will.”

“It’s been so long since you’ve had me.” He kissed you and talked at the same time. “If we had time, right now, I’d let you—damn it.” It took you a few seconds, but eventually you realized that Justin was walking away from you and saying hello to the people that were pouring in the studio door. You watched him make small talk like nothing had happened, like he hadn’t just fucked your brains out all over the controls that these guys were about to touch. You wondered if you could walk away as easily as he was then, with a wink and a nod to you before he was out the door.

Then you realized he’d kept his hands to himself, shoved deep in his pockets, and had quickly slipped out the door someone else had opened. You hoped it was you he was trying to keep to himself, you still all over his fingers and in his mouth. While the studio guys and musicians started setting up, you imagined Justin driving away with that hand on his face, smelling you. Tasting you.

You had to excuse yourself to the bathroom. Then you sang like a bird for the rest of the day.

Not two weeks later you got a hand delivered package—a box containing a box containing a box containing an envelope containing a jewel case containing a sleeve containing a compact disc. The handwriting on the label read Recording Studio 2004 : Listen when you’re missing me. It took all your willpower to not play it right away and instead save it for your upcoming trip to London. Finally, a 9 hour flight that you could actually look forward to.

~~*~~